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What's The Best Prank You Have Played On Someone?


Bad_Mobby

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Was at some kind of 'Team Building' shite with my work, out in the wilds of Scotland with winter approaching. It was fucking miserable, made all the more depressing by the fact that there were a bunch of English guys on the course inna.

 

I usually don't mind the English, truth be told, but there was a lad, Paul, from Wigan, who was a Tosser without equal. He was just an ignorant, obnoxious, arrogant twat of a guy, and everyone hated him. Naturally he was placed as team leader, and he chose all the English lads to be his team, which suited the Scottish guys down to the ground

 

We actually played a few 'pranks' on the fucker, at least one of which, in retrospect, might be construed by a court of law as 'attempted murder'.

 

We had him convinced that Haggises were real animals, and that the guy from Inverness had an uncle whose Haggis Farm was the second largest in Scotland. One night, as we're bumping along a dark, pissing wet, forest road, some animal darts out in front of the jeep's headlights. "SAW 'AGGIS!" screams Paul fae Wigan, and shoots off into the forest to claim his prize. The lad was a fucking tool.

 

One of the 'Team Building Activities' was to build a raft and float it across a fucking Loch. The temperature can't have been much above zero, it was snowing, and they wanted us to build a raft on the beach, then paddle it across to the other side, where there was stuff left out for a bivouac. Obviously the team first across got the pick of the tarps and string... fuckin' yay :clangers2:

 

The Weegian, I forget his name... but he was actually a first class bloke... pulls out his knife and, when the English lads are all off foraging, he sabotages the ropes binding the oil drums under the English raft and returns with a grin on his face.

 

The English get their shit together before we do, and with howls of derision at the feckless sweaties, off they paddle into the freezing waters of the loch in the fading light of a Scottish almost-winter.

 

Progress is slow for them, the water's a bit choppy, the wind is driving snow into their faces, but their spirits are buoyed by repeatedly turning round to flip us off and shout 'encouragement' at us.

 

Splash Splash Splash go their little wooden paddles. Splash Splash Splash, they go.

 

"Hurry up, Sweaties!" They shout! "Come on, Jock! Shake a leg!"

 

They were so happy, bless them.

 

They were about a third of the way across when the first oil drum catapults itself 10 feet into the air.

 

Desperately they reposition themselves to counterbalance the loss of oil drum number 1.

 

As they're trying to retrieve that barrel another pops off, and the first of the English plunge into the freezing water.

 

Chaos ensues as the raft continues to break apart and the English are left clinging to barrels and logs in the gathering darkness.

 

Now there were canoes. We could, technically, have paddled out and performed a rescue, but since none of us were licensed Canoe Drivers we felt it safer to just pish ourselves laughing on the beach as the English clung onto life and screamed like children.

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My family are all originally from Falkirk/Stirling area but my mum and I moved to a place between Inverness and Tup's part of the country when I was young.

 

Anyway coming back from a family funeral in Falkirk at night, I was probably about 13 and in the car with my mother a bit before Aviemore and she ordered my tape of Scremaldelica to be turned off. So the radio was on which I gently de-tuned, blaming the mountains - which we'd mostly passed by then: so with only static to listen to Bobby G. and co. were put back on.

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Me and my mates used to go up to folks houses

 

Ring the doorbell

 

Then run away :hysterical:

 

Folk actually thought they had visitors at the door :hysterical:

 

Mugs.

 

Belter

 

hysterical.gif

 

We used to play fitba at school every lunchtime. Abody would put down there bags and we would use them as goalposts.

 

I mind once I nicked my mates bag and threw it on top of the school roof for no reason (we were just like that with each other). When we told him about it he was raging, but he was too embarrassed to tell the school receptionist what had happened and ask for it back...

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Again during a drug fuelled night in the early 90's Acid I believe, there was a heap of new trees planted on the field between Oldmachar and Asda, for a prank we started attacking them with no mercy and it got a bit out of hand.

None of us could even remember if it even happened or had we imagined it.

 

Oh how we laughed when we were reminded by it on the front page of the Evening Express on the Monday with the headline Mindless Vandals.

 

It was really really funny, it really was, ripping the life out the defenceless saplings.

 

 

You had to be there.

 

For Mobbys benefit..........Slinkers was heavily involved but I may have administered the first body slam.

 

Similar to when The Hulk and myself destroyed then threw that whole hotel room out of the window in Lithuania

 

The look on the staffs and bus load of Danish school childrens faces :hysterical:

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Was at some kind of 'Team Building' shite with my work, out in the wilds of Scotland with winter approaching. It was fucking miserable, made all the more depressing by the fact that there were a bunch of English guys on the course inna.

 

I usually don't mind the English, truth be told, but there was a lad, Paul, from Wigan, who was a Tosser without equal. He was just an ignorant, obnoxious, arrogant twat of a guy, and everyone hated him. Naturally he was placed as team leader, and he chose all the English lads to be his team, which suited the Scottish guys down to the ground

 

We actually played a few 'pranks' on the fucker, at least one of which, in retrospect, might be construed by a court of law as 'attempted murder'.

 

We had him convinced that Haggises were real animals, and that the guy from Inverness had an uncle whose Haggis Farm was the second largest in Scotland. One night, as we're bumping along a dark, pissing wet, forest road, some animal darts out in front of the jeep's headlights. "SAW 'AGGIS!" screams Paul fae Wigan, and shoots off into the forest to claim his prize. The lad was a fucking tool.

 

One of the 'Team Building Activities' was to build a raft and float it across a fucking Loch. The temperature can't have been much above zero, it was snowing, and they wanted us to build a raft on the beach, then paddle it across to the other side, where there was stuff left out for a bivouac. Obviously the team first across got the pick of the tarps and string... fuckin' yay :clangers2:

 

The Weegian, I forget his name... but he was actually a first class bloke... pulls out his knife and, when the English lads are all off foraging, he sabotages the ropes binding the oil drums under the English raft and returns with a grin on his face.

 

The English get their shit together before we do, and with howls of derision at the feckless sweaties, off they paddle into the freezing waters of the loch in the fading light of a Scottish almost-winter.

 

Progress is slow for them, the water's a bit choppy, the wind is driving snow into their faces, but their spirits are buoyed by repeatedly turning round to flip us off and shout 'encouragement' at us.

 

Splash Splash Splash go their little wooden paddles. Splash Splash Splash, they go.

 

"Hurry up, Sweaties!" They shout! "Come on, Jock! Shake a leg!"

 

They were so happy, bless them.

 

They were about a third of the way across when the first oil drum catapults itself 10 feet into the air.

 

Desperately they reposition themselves to counterbalance the loss of oil drum number 1.

 

As they're trying to retrieve that barrel another pops off, and the first of the English plunge into the freezing water.

 

Chaos ensues as the raft continues to break apart and the English are left clinging to barrels and logs in the gathering darkness.

 

Now there were canoes. We could, technically, have paddled out and performed a rescue, but since none of us were licensed Canoe Drivers we felt it safer to just pish ourselves laughing on the beach as the English clung onto life and screamed like children.

 

Awesome.

 

I'd +10 it if I could.

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Stole a car from the local garage and drove it into the side of a house

 

Stole a works van and wrote it off by crashing it into field ( 2 weeks in hospital)

 

Blew up a guys garage

 

Got taken to court for calling out the fire brigade on several occassions (fined

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Went to auchmill golf course once.

Shit in the 18th hole.

Waited till some mug got to the green.

He holed, to me and my mates' applause.

...............

...............

Boy's face turned slate gray as he realised what was co-habiting the hole with his ball.

Massive LOL apart fae him, who launched said shitey projectile in our direction as we legged it!

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About 6 years ago when I was 16, my friend egged Fraser Fyvie at his house in Sheddocksley. Knocked on his door, he answered and cracked an egg right off his head. He then proceeded to go and get his own egg and tried to egg us back. Then his mother chased us all for ages with the thick end of a snooker cue. She nearly caught me, she was surprisingly agile for an older lady.

 

I loved the eggings that used to occur on Halloween.

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Excellent Rumpus, you would have got on smashing with my pal Smiley.

 

He was an amateur pyrotechnic enthusiast and arsonist once he'd had a cider or two.

 

Almost burnt Asda BOD to the ground had it not been for the entire Grampian Fire Brigade keeping the fire from getting further out of hand.

 

We put a firework through the letterbox of a family known only as the flares family. Their only crime was having little money and still, quite rightly so utilising old clothes from the 70's.

It was a letterbox that was direct into the living room. The colours even through the half closed curtains when the firework went off were quite beautiful.

 

When I say we, I was but a bystander.

 

:hysterical::hysterical:

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Was down in London visiting some friends, when they told me it was the weekend of the London Marathon

 

So I went to a shop and bought a massive jar of marbles

 

I then went down to the starting line

 

And just before the starting pistol fired

 

I pished on the leg of the boy standing infront of me :hysterical:

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Guest milne_afc

Me and a coupe of mates were down in Edinburgh last year

 

We went into a joke shop

 

Bought some stink bombs

 

.....then let them off in the shop :hysterical:

 

 

Your spastic impression at one of the bouncers the following night was rather amusing too.

 

 

Also had the bobbies at my door for setting light to dogshit on someone's doorstep. Think i convinced them that if i hadn't chapped on the door, that whole family could have perished.

 

:hysterical:

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Me and my mate Jimmy were skiving school

 

We were mucking about with spud guns

 

A lorry was away to drive past so Jimmy stared straight into the drivers soul then pointed his spud gun at his head

 

The boy shat it and skidded into some old wifies Metro City :hysterical:

 

We ran away laughing :hysterical:

 

She never recovered after that

 

But it was worth it :hysterical:

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