Ramandu Posted June 15, 2023 Share Posted June 15, 2023 26 minutes ago, perthshirered said: 5. The other ane that's so shite it doesn't get a real name. You mean your ring finger? It's called a "ring finger". Obviously not for those who want to stay free and don't want to be tied down (are scared of commitment). Link to comment
GRECOSSE Posted June 15, 2023 Author Share Posted June 15, 2023 Things you really shouldn’t like to eat Foie gras (with honey) lescargots in a garlic butter Pork scratching Potted meat A whole packet of marzipan eaten slowly with a knife Link to comment
Dad Posted June 16, 2023 Share Posted June 16, 2023 Top 5 Wives: 1. Hilary Clinton 2. Mia Farrow 3. J-Lo 4. Jackie Onassis 5. KT Tungstall Link to comment
BrianFaePerth Posted June 16, 2023 Share Posted June 16, 2023 Top 5 beasts 1 Dad 2 Poodles 3 Mobby 4 Dad 5 Dad Link to comment
Dad Posted June 16, 2023 Share Posted June 16, 2023 Top 5 Chives: 1. Common 2. Garlic 3. Giant Siberian 4. Hooker's 5. Blue Link to comment
Dad Posted June 16, 2023 Share Posted June 16, 2023 Top 5 Clive's: 1. Sinclair 2. Anderson 3. James 4. Mendonca 5. Barker Link to comment
Redmist1903 Posted June 16, 2023 Share Posted June 16, 2023 8 hours ago, Hagi's pubic hair said: Top 5 worst UK accents Welsh Northern Irish male Welsh Cunts from Easterhouse in Glasgow Brummie 1. Scouse 2. Scouse 3. Scouse 4. Scouse 5. Nasal Glaswegian Link to comment
redone Posted June 16, 2023 Share Posted June 16, 2023 A wee early morning teaser for the Hatters…. Guess what the topic of this Top 5 is 1. Fried 2. Scrambled 3. Poached 4. Soft-boiled 5. Hard-boiled Link to comment
NEM Posted June 16, 2023 Share Posted June 16, 2023 9 hours ago, Dad said: Top 5 Knives: 1. Nakiri Bocho 2. Santoku 3. Dagger 4. Butter 5. Bread Stabby old cunt Link to comment
NEM Posted June 16, 2023 Share Posted June 16, 2023 9 hours ago, RAZOR said: 1. Brannigans 2. Discos 3. Nik Naks 4. Flamin Hot Cheetos 5. McCoys Walkers Max jalapeño and cheese S&V discos Brannigans Space Raiders Monster Munch Link to comment
Studebaker-90 Posted June 16, 2023 Share Posted June 16, 2023 Top 5 types of poo 1. Ones that leave huge skids 2. Ghostys (no wipe) 3. Logs with sweetcorn 4. After coffee fast ones 5. Ones that are different shades of brown throughout Link to comment
milne_afc Posted June 16, 2023 Share Posted June 16, 2023 26 minutes ago, Studebaker-90 said: Top 5 types of poo You’re an adult male. It’s shit, shite or if an elderly woman is present, poops is acceptable. Link to comment
BrianFaePerth Posted June 16, 2023 Share Posted June 16, 2023 28 minutes ago, Studebaker-90 said: 5. Ones that are different shades of brown throughout My dog is an expert at that. From a very light tan colour to Jimmy Calderwood, the colours sort of intertwine. Link to comment
Studebaker-90 Posted June 16, 2023 Share Posted June 16, 2023 Doing a coffee one as we speak Link to comment
Dad Posted June 16, 2023 Share Posted June 16, 2023 2 hours ago, NEM said: Stabby old cunt A dab hand in the kitchen son 🤚 Link to comment
Studebaker-90 Posted June 16, 2023 Share Posted June 16, 2023 Just now, Sooper-hanz said: What on gods earth is a coffee shite? When you have your morning coffee it gets your bowels moving and it comes out hard and fast, leaving an almighty mess. Link to comment
GRECOSSE Posted June 16, 2023 Author Share Posted June 16, 2023 21 hours ago, Beachend Bootboy said: Top 5 swear words. 1) Cunt 2) Wanker 3) Bastard 4) Cunt again 5) Fuckin areshole (two words but I've use Cunt twice) The OP of this thread qualifies as every one. Fuckin' Cocksocket (bonus word). Edgy! Have you ever thought about a career in writing in the immortal words of the Big Yin “you should get yourself an agent pal why sit there in the dark handling yourself “ Anyway enjoy you free soup tomorrow Link to comment
Beachend Bootboy Posted June 16, 2023 Share Posted June 16, 2023 48 minutes ago, GRECOSSE said: Edgy! Have you ever thought about a career in writing in the immortal words of the Big Yin “you should get yourself an agent pal why sit there in the dark handling yourself “ Anyway enjoy you free soup tomorrow For fuck's sake. Is that yer best shot? Borin' cunt. Lolz!!!! Link to comment
Zeus Posted June 16, 2023 Share Posted June 16, 2023 Top 5 suppers from the chipper. 1. King rib 2. Jumbo haddock 3. Mock chop 4. Spicy haggis 5. Macaroni pie Link to comment
Parklife Posted June 16, 2023 Share Posted June 16, 2023 2 hours ago, Zeus said: Top 5 suppers from the chipper. 1. King rib 2. Jumbo haddock 3. Mock chop 4. Spicy haggis 5. Macaroni pie 1. Fish 2. Pizza Crunch 3. Sausage 4. Haggis 5. Steak Pie Link to comment
DD1903 Posted June 16, 2023 Share Posted June 16, 2023 Most easily quotable tv shows partridge the office (US) the office (original) phoenix nights simpsons (classic episodes) special mention to beavis and butthead. Link to comment
RAZOR Posted June 16, 2023 Share Posted June 16, 2023 47 minutes ago, Bad_Mobby said: Easy. Fish (the others are just chasers)’ Have to agree. It's a hudduck supper with a chaser. Top 5 chasers 1. Red (nae Glesga) 2. White 3. Mock chop 4. King Rib 5. Sausage (in Glesga when you get 2) Link to comment
tutankamun Posted June 16, 2023 Share Posted June 16, 2023 1. Milligan 2. Cleese 3. Everett 4. Sessions 5. erm… 2 Link to comment
Misers Hill Posted June 17, 2023 Share Posted June 17, 2023 17 hours ago, BrianFaePerth said: My dog is an expert at that. From a very light tan colour to Jimmy Calderwood, the colours sort of intertwine. Certainly don't see White dog shite anymore🦈.....all eh rave back en💀 Link to comment
Beachend Bootboy Posted June 17, 2023 Share Posted June 17, 2023 3 hours ago, Misers Hill said: Certainly don't see White dog shite anymore🦈.....all eh rave back en💀 Bone meal. I miss that. Link to comment
Beachend Bootboy Posted June 17, 2023 Share Posted June 17, 2023 5 top ways to hit some cunt. 1) Heidbutt 2) Kick in the steens 3) Poke in the eye 4) Poke in both eyes 5) Straight fingers or punch to the throat Doon yeh go son and don't get up, there's mare o' that. There after, pick yer shots😁 Link to comment
alscotoz Posted June 17, 2023 Share Posted June 17, 2023 Live albums The Last Waltz Get Your Ya Yas Out At Folsom Prison Nirvana unplugged The Way to go Out Link to comment
Fridge Posted June 17, 2023 Share Posted June 17, 2023 4 hours ago, Beachend Bootboy said: 5 top ways to hit some cunt. 1) Heidbutt 2) Kick in the steens 3) Poke in the eye 4) Poke in both eyes 5) Straight fingers or punch to the throat Doon yeh go son and don't get up, there's mare o' that. There after, pick yer shots😁 This is incorrect, I’ve consulted Hutch. It’s air shot and get lamped. 1 Link to comment
redone Posted June 17, 2023 Share Posted June 17, 2023 13 hours ago, tutankamun said: 1. Milligan 2. Cleese 3. Everett 4. Sessions 5. erm… Most smug, over-rated , up-their-own-arse , so-called comedians ? ….. Ross Noble at no. 5 Link to comment
Fridge Posted June 17, 2023 Share Posted June 17, 2023 33 minutes ago, redone said: Most smug, over-rated , up-their-own-arse , so-called comedians ? ….. Ross Noble at no. 5 Jimmy Carr Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now