Pet Hates

[Simply Red]

Cop26. Everything about it. Fuck off

[maryhilldon]

36 minutes ago, Simply Red said:

Cop26. Everything about it. Fuck off

Yep. Brutal for the minions trying to go about their daily lives in the weeg atm. Folk can't even access the streets they live in or get to work without big diversions. Fuck politicians.

[Ke1t]

56 minutes ago, Simply Red said:

Cop26. Everything about it. Fuck off

You a coal merchant, by any chance? 

[Parklife]

I absolutely love having Scotland the centre of the world for once. It's great. 

[Redforever86]

29 minutes ago, Sooper-hanz said:

It's a pain in the arse. They could have done it over Skype or Microsoft Teams

Should have hosted it out of the way of everyone at the bottom o one of those Bitcoin mines. 

[Ke1t]

Women explaining shit gets on my fucking wick. 

There's a thing lezzas like to say, 'Mansplaining', which is when a guy explains something that a chick may or may not already know. 

"Oh, hey, thanks for mansplaining how to use an angle-grinder', they'll say sarcastically.. as if they already fucking knew what an angle grinder is, never mind how to use one properly. They didn't know... none of them fucking know...which is why they'll always  let you explain how it works before saying, "I already knew that"... aye, did you fuck. 

At least when a guy explains something he gets to the point.

'Here's how it works, Any questions?' Done. Explained. 

You look on Youtube for any kind of recipe, though, and you have these wittering fucking cunts banging on about how, "My family LOVES this beef stew, especially when the cold weather starts to..." 

...just fucking tell me how many carrots I need, you fucking inane cunt! I don't care if your family DOES love to get out in the Winter and walk down snowy paths with Jacky-Boy your Golden Retriever... who you found as a puppy abandoned by the side of the road... and your Labradoodle mix who you just HAVE to tell us a funny story about... when I'm standing here waiting for you to get around to FINALLY fucking telling me what to set the gas to, you bitch... you fucking bitch... 

You fucking bitch. 

[Redforever86]

I’ve got a bird fae South America  volunteering here, academically clever but I presume back home she had servants, cause after watching her try to use a potato peeler and put glasses in the dish washer the wrong way round I’ve decided she has the domestic skills of a pissed Harvey Price. 
 

Yet she laughs at me when I repeat things to her like she’s a five year old. 

[Ramandu]

4 minutes ago, Sooper-hanz said:

No such thing imo

You mean that us folk who did well in education but are useless in real life are actually clever in all areas? I could like this theory.

[Ke1t]

2 minutes ago, Sooper-hanz said:

Nah. Ive never been impressed by academic achievement in the main. You've got a degree? So fuck. So have I. Anyone can do that.    

Nail on the heed, my homosexual friend. 

The last year of EVERY college degree should be surviving in the wilderness without a cell phone, or access to shelter,  or medical assistance.

If you can survive a year on your tod, fighting the elements, hunger, and... most importantly.. bears, then and only then should you be allowed into society. 

If you can't survive, then the C List celebrity of your choice will deliver one of 3 pre-recorded eulogies at your funeral, should your remains ever be found. 

 

 

[Ohjimmyjimmy]

1 hour ago, Sooper-hanz said:

Nah. Ive never been impressed by academic achievement in the main. You've got a degree? So fuck. So have I. Anyone can do that.    

The fuck have you got a degree in? Selling carpets?

[Misers Hill]

1 hour ago, Ohjimmyjimmy said:

The fuck have you got a degree in? Selling carpets?

He's divorced fae Shiela Ferguson...never had the width...?....pathetic ?

[Simply Red]

7 hours ago, Sooper-hanz said:

It's a pain in the arse. They could have done it over Skype or Microsoft Teams

Surely skype shouldve been the first choice, greener, cheaper, more 2021 way to do it.

Farcical the expense, waste, carbon footprint, upheaval to the locals that its caused. 
 

Its a hollow rhetoric cliche fest on all sides and the protestors/campaigners are unbearably cringey. 
 

One in the news last night getting into a real tiz cos she didnt like how the police were ‘kettling’ them as they protested in the city streets because it was intimidating. No thoughts to the fact they are helping keep the peace and give the locals a bit of assurance that the middle class eco warriors arent going to start coming the cunt.

[Poodler]

8 hours ago, Parklife said:

I absolutely love having Scotland the centre of the world for once. It's great. 

Just seen pics of Di Caprio in Maryhill 

bizarre 

[BrianFaePerth]

19 minutes ago, Poodler said:

Just seen pics of Di Caprio in Maryhilldon

 

That’s one WhatsApp group eh am glad not to be a part of

[For Fecks Sake]

7 hours ago, Sooper-hanz said:

Nah. Ive never been impressed by academic achievement in the main. You've got a degree? So fuck. So have I. Anyone can do that.    

Love Shania Twain

[Redforever86]

4 hours ago, Simply Red said:

One in the news last night getting into a real tiz cos she didnt like how the police were ‘kettling’ them as they protested in the city streets because it was intimidating. No thoughts to the fact they are helping keep the peace and give the locals a bit of assurance that the middle class eco warriors arent going to start coming the cunt.

Im quite disappointed the local neds haven’t been battering the posh cunts and stealing their bongos. Weegies gone soft. 

[Redforever86]

11 hours ago, Sooper-hanz said:

No such thing imo

Yeah you’re right, I was just being polite. It’s a nice way of saying retard with out common sense who if they work hard enough can memorise some simple theories to regurgitate. 

I slept in a bit this morning* and despite fuck all in the kitchen being on, zero food cooked, no dirty dishes, etc etc she thought rather than being in bed I was maybe outside and had had an accident. 
 

*phone charger fucked and battery died in the night when plugged in to it.

[manboobs109]

13 hours ago, Simply Red said:

Cop26. Everything about it. Fuck off

If they achieved anything they wouldn't have had to have 26 of them.

I'm with you. Everyone of them can fuck right off. BoJo got a private jet to London then a Range Rover to the Garrick Club to eat roast beef and imported red wine after lecturing us all about carbon footprints.

Bunch of utter cunts

[manboobs109]

5 hours ago, Simply Red said:

Surely skype shouldve been the first choice, greener, cheaper, more 2021 way to do it.

Farcical the expense, waste, carbon footprint, upheaval to the locals that its caused. 
 

Its a hollow rhetoric cliche fest on all sides and the protestors/campaigners are unbearably cringey. 
 

One in the news last night getting into a real tiz cos she didnt like how the police were ‘kettling’ them as they protested in the city streets because it was intimidating. No thoughts to the fact they are helping keep the peace and give the locals a bit of assurance that the middle class eco warriors arent going to start coming the cunt.

I saw footage of a guy getting threatened and called a fascist because he had some banner about closing borders. Surely less travel is what these cunts want?

[manboobs109]

2 hours ago, Sooper-hanz said:

You think selling carpets is easy?

I hate doing these but for @Parklife

Love Slick Rick

[manboobs109]

2 hours ago, Sooper-hanz said:

You think selling carpets is easy?

I'm away to buy a carpet today Hanzo, any buzzwords or industry terms I can throw in so the boy knows he's not dealing with a chump?

[Guest milne_afc]

3 minutes ago, manboobs109 said:

I'm away to buy a carpet today

For the bathroom?

[Bluto10]

aye. mention pile, and throw in underlay

[Parklife]

14 minutes ago, manboobs109 said:

I'm away to buy a carpet today Hanzo, any buzzwords or industry terms I can throw in so the boy knows he's not dealing with a chump?

Ask him if he knows what Mexicans put under their carpets. 

He'll never have heard that one before. 

[Matt Armstrong's Dog]

31 minutes ago, manboobs109 said:

I'm away to buy a carpet today Hanzo, any buzzwords or industry terms I can throw in so the boy knows he's not dealing with a chump?

Dinna buy your carpet online, Moobs min. Far better getting a feel of one in a showroom and relying on your instincts rather than getting one online. 

The last couple I bought online have been very poor quality, mind you I dinna ken what I expected for £2.99 a squared metre and £7.99 a squared metre respectively though. My own fault but needs must, better than walking on splinters though?.

[dazzy_deff]

1 minute ago, Matt Armstrong's Dog said:

Dinna buy your carpet online, Moobs min. Far better getting a feel of one in a showroom and relying on your instincts rather than getting one online. 

The last couple I bought online have been very poor quality, mind you I dinna ken what I expected for £2.99 a squared metre and £7.99 a squared metre respectively though. My own fault but needs must, better than walking on splinters though?.

Or go view them in a shop, take a note of the make and style of carpet, then source it cheaper online. 

[Matt Armstrong's Dog]

4 minutes ago, dazzy_deff said:

Or go view them in a shop, take a note of the make and style of carpet, then source it cheaper online. 

Very good shout min?.

Never thought of that for the one I bought, pre-lockdown. The other one though was bought when the showrooms were shut, but me being an impatient bugger, plumped for one online instead of waiting a wee bit longer for the showrooms to reopen.  

[manboobs109]

26 minutes ago, Matt Armstrong's Dog said:

Dinna buy your carpet online, Moobs min. Far better getting a feel of one in a showroom and relying on your instincts rather than getting one online. 

The last couple I bought online have been very poor quality, mind you I dinna ken what I expected for £2.99 a squared metre and £7.99 a squared metre respectively though. My own fault but needs must, better than walking on splinters though?.

Na I'll be buying in store.

[Matt Armstrong's Dog]

2 minutes ago, manboobs109 said:

Na I'll be buying in store.

Good lad. That's the best way to do it plus the smell of a new carpet in a showroom is one of life's simple pleasures. 

[The Boofon]

30 minutes ago, dazzy_deff said:

Or go view them in a shop, take a note of the make and style of carpet, then source it cheaper online. 

I only agree with this if you're going to some big chain like Carpetwise. If going to an independent shop then that's very poor form.

4 minutes ago, manboobs109 said:

Na I'll be buying in store.

Good lad. (If it's an independent one)