Cat Owners

[Jack_Glass]

any cat owners on here? just thought i'd share this bit of info with ya in-case your suffers similar symptoms, i'm a big softy when it comes to cats

 

symptoms of 'compact anal glands' its basically an infection that causes cats a lot of pain thus they can't do the toilet

 

large pupils

won't eat but may drink if you take the water to them

avoids moving around n becomes more affectionate than usual

looks a bit delirious and scared

tale tucked low and close to the body

we noticed late at night the cat making sounds like she was in distress

this can last for several days, a cat dying has similar symptoms so it's a worry for cat lovers

 

cost to remedy this was £47

 

basically the vet pushes down on the bladder and anal glands to release everything, this causes the cat to scream out, they then give the cat an anti-biotic to deal with the glands, a mild pain killer and the cat equivalent of human valium, by the time we got her home she was strolling about, the change was practically instantaneous, expect a full recovery within 24hrs

 

happy days

[seanthesheep]

Bluto gets sexual thrills from stuff like that.

 

Its what happens after a lifetime of female rejection.

 

After he's spunked he lies there in his personalised football top sobbing as the realization kicks in that he is a complete waste of skin.

 

He's now down to cyber mates, although we'll use the term mate loosely as everyone thinks hes a balloon.

 

It didn't work out in the real world, the cyber world hate you, your parents didn't even know each other and your stepparents are up to this point your only sexual encounter to involve a third party.

 

He'll combat the hate with laughing smilies and crazy talk of days gone by but he's sitting there typing, tears rolling down his cheeks, completely naked. He'll glance up at a row of hanging personalized football tops, the tears will stop, he'll stand up chest puffed out, pull down his favourite and like Reeves in Superman the transformation is complete, he's back in the game, a f**king superhero if you will!!! BRING ON THE WORLD!!

 

But sorry folks, what we have is a grown man, naked from the waist down, a penis that gave up on seeing the velvet inner of a womans vagina years ago getting minor sexual thrills from being a banjo on the internet. As all the members all log off one by one as the night wears on Bluto is left screaming at the screen, TALK TO ME, LET ME HUMILIATE YOU!! But alas his screams are silent and again, he's all alone as he slumps into the mountain of empty Pot Noodle cartons and beds down for the evening.

 

By the way

 

I like cats.

 

 

I like cats too. My mum is mad for them. I always remember 1 cat in particular. Very clever it was. It used to go outside, do a poo, dig a hole and put its poo in it. Clever cat was oor Charlie!

[TheG_L_A]

Cat sh*t is worse than most other animals shits.

 

Is what i think on the subject.

 

I bet Bluto prowls the streets at night after a heavy session looking for stray cats to f**k.

[CrazyBullSheep]

Mr pipes did you get out of bed on the wrong side this morning.

 

You'll have Bluto in tears min.

 

 

 

I have a cat and i hate it and it hates me uses my house like a f**king hotel and think he owns me.

 

All cats must f**king die

 

I like Dogs though :thumbs:

[Jonty]

I don't trust people that own cats, shifty buggers.

[TheG_L_A]

 

 

 

I have a cat and i hate it and it hates me uses my house like a f**king hotel and think he owns me.

 

 

 

Why don't you volley the f**ker then?

[CrazyBullSheep]

Why don't you volley the f**ker then?

 

Hmm good option

 

Dont think the wife would approve though

[Pash]

I am also a cat lover.

 

I have 2 female cats. One is 10 years younger than the other and tries to be friends with the older one but she has none of it. This is after our last cat died (RIP Smokey) cos the young one used to follow him around everywhere but she doesn't have a mate anymore to play with.

 

All cats do is sleep, eat and sleep.

 

I want to be a cat.

[TheG_L_A]

Hmm good option

 

Dont think the wife would approve though

 

Volley her to.

[amancalledbuck]

Volley her to.

 

To where?

[TheG_L_A]

to f**k.