Worst Christmas Present You Have Received

[Tenerifered]

Mind getting Talcum Powder WTF

[thebladder]

Celtic Car Air-Freshner

 

To be fair, ma Grunny went loopy that year and got abody bizarre presents.

[RUL]

Celtic Car Air-Freshner

 

To be fair, ma Grunny went loopy that year and got abody bizarre presents.

quality, what did you say?

[snoyl]

I got Billy Elliot on video years ago! The person that got me it thought it was a football film for some fucked up reason, add that to the fact videos were getting binned at the time for DVD's, now thats a gift hard to beat!

[Podge]

A Savage Garden cd. After my confusion when I opened it, 'santa' soon realised they had got the wrapping wrong and quickly switched it for the cd my sister had still wrapped up, before our little brother noticed!

[The Boofon]

I got a packet of batteries when I was a kid.

 

Shit present but they were for a remote control car which was opened a couple of presents later so it turned out well in the end but I remember thinking at the time what the fuck kind of a present is that?

 

Too young to appreciate that it was a clue to something else coming later.

 

Worst one I bought was flying lessons for my wife.

However the company went bust before she took the lessons rendering the vouchers worthless.

[Pash]

I get a Lynx shower set every year.

 

Woopee.

[zander]

My uncle bought me a rugby game for the pc. Pretty horrific.

[Dazzler]

Boxer shorts, two sizes too small and by George at Asda.

 

My brother from the same Auntie got

[King Street Loon]

My auntie and uncle are a bit eccentric and visit India 2-3 times a year.

So you always know that you're going to get a strange gift at Christmas.

Weirdest one I've had would be a fist sized, smooth stone which was painted with an Elephant on it.

It was decided that it was a paperweight I'd been given.

My parents and sisters always get strange stuff from them too.

[The Boofon]

Boxer shorts, two sizes too small and by George at Asda.

 

My brother from the same Auntie got

[tup]

I got Billy Elliot on video years ago! The person that got me it thought it was a football film for some fucked up reason, add that to the fact videos were getting binned at the time for DVD's, now thats a gift hard to beat!

 

The football musical is called Calum Elliot, but is possibly a bit risque for children, although Hearts have an amoral stance in terms of what children should/should not be exposed to, so it's got a PG certificate, meaning kids have to watch it with an adult, which the club can provide if the kids are struggling.

 

You can get it in the Hearts club shop, would make a cracking stocking filler for any homosexual relatives.

[Oklahoma 1903]

When I was a kid I told my folks I wanted something to wear and something to play with.

 

 

On Christmas day I got a pair of trousers with the pockets cut out.

[tup]

My nana used to knit me gansies with corn-rows on them, kids these days wouldna be seen dead in them, but by fuck they were warm, and they lasted years as hand-me-downs.

 

Now the kids are cutting about with jeans with no arse in them, skinny saps, with long hair and Ipods, thinking they're fucking Erchie.

 

We had fuck all, but it was the making of us, taught you to fight for everything.

[Tenerifered]

Why only last year my folks were getting chezed saying, "just you wait for your xmas present".

 

Straight away i knew it would be shit.

 

It was one of those Harry Potter wands for the TV.

 

It might have been a good gift if, i liked Harry Potter, was a Geek and it was 1985 and there were still only 4 channels.

 

You flick up the channels with an upward swoosh so BBC 1 up to Sky Sports and then up to Babestation is a fair amount of swooshing, swooshing that i reckon the Speccy Twat wizard himself would tire of pretty quickly.

 

Its been in my pants and socks drawer since last Boxing Day.

 

Thats not the wand your used to flicking at the tv eh cheesers ;-)

[Tenerifered]

Why only last year my folks were getting chezed saying, "just you wait for your xmas present".

 

Straight away i knew it would be shit.

 

It was one of those Harry Potter wands for the TV.

 

It might have been a good gift if, i liked Harry Potter, was a Geek and it was 1985 and there were still only 4 channels.

 

You flick up the channels with an upward swoosh so BBC 1 up to Sky Sports and then up to Babestation is a fair amount of swooshing, swooshing that i reckon the Speccy Twat wizard himself would tire of pretty quickly.

 

Its been in my pants and socks drawer since last Boxing Day.

 

Thats not the wand your used to flicking at the tv eh cheesers ;-)

[stirlingsheep]

My aunt once bought me a sponge for xmas. I was four. Like someone mentioned above she had lost the plot at this stage.

[tup]

My sadistic cunt of a mother knitted me a school jumper one year, from the rear a simple grey wool jumper, from the front a hideous technicolour patchwork design that a lesser man would have been bullied to the point of suicide.

 

Primary 4 was a year i'll never forget, i was brave and came out the other end a fucking warrior.

 

Getting bullied is character building, helps you think outside the box, and think of ways of physically hurting folk much bigger than you, when they are least expecting it.

 

My brother bullied me solid for 16 years, water off a duck's back, one punch ended it at 17, once I became bigger than him.

 

Complaining about being bullied on the other hand will mean you live a cossetted life, where you rely on others for everything, as you are simply unable or unwilling to stand up for yourself.

 

If a kid is being bullied at school, the ONLY means of stopping it is to hit your perpertrator hard, right between the eyes, making sure you get your knuckles in contact with the nose, blood drawn, you get credit, end of bullying.

 

Running to the teacher makes the situation much, much worse.

[dervish]

My nana got me a gameboy game, never had one. Most galling fact was that it looked quite good. Days before ebay too.

[Henry]

If your rumbled mid filth channel you could be 10 downward flicks from safety, coupled with an erection poking out your dressing gown, its time to pull out the emergency handbook and fake a heart attack.

 

literal lol.