Too Old To Be A Tart

[The Boofon]

I'd shag her although she is pig ugly.

 

Jings

[Ke1t]

I'd shag her although she is pig ugly.

 

Jings

 

 

That's a dude, dude.

 

[The Boofon]

That's a dude, dude.

 

 

 

Fuck link wasn't added.

 

Try this.

 

Doh

[robbo]

lulz, boofon has a thing for male heroin junkies. dinna try and cover it up wi that 28 yr old slapper, your secrets out

[Redstar]

Fuck link wasn't added.

 

Try this.

 

Doh

 

Think I'd rather do the bloke

[Jones]

Yikes she's only 28...

 

I still would of course as she's definitely of the dirty variety but she's definitely seen better days.

[dervish]

Doesn't look 28, but I know that's just the sort I'd bang the shit out of if I had half a chance at the end of a night. I'd prob have her down as a 40yr old divorcee, and I'd be half right. Only (kinda...) thing is 5 kids... depends on how well she's been sewn back up could be a right mess.

[Ke1t]

Doesn't look 28, but I know that's just the sort I'd bang the shit out of if I had half a chance at the end of a night. I'd prob have her down as a 40yr old divorcee, and I'd be half right. Only (kinda...) thing is 5 kids... depends on how well she's been sewn back up could be a right mess.

 

Okay, so I'm going through the checklist, and I'm seeing a major problem here...

 

1. Body's good. Looks like she takes care of it, hair's bleached all to fuck, but, hey, I'm not a hair care specialist so pass marks there too.

 

2. Clothes. Less material than a pair of my boxers, so yeah... she knows the score.

 

3. Boots. Oh yeah She's got the boots... and she'll be keeping them on inna.

 

4. Tatas. Good looking tatas. And big tatas like Kelt likes. What's not to like with big tatas?

 

5. Face. This is my problem right here. She's obviously put a shitload of effort into everything else, despite what the faggot who runs the club has to say for himself, but... where's the make-up? 99% of chicks do NOT look like Angelina Jolie. A couple of the chicks I've banged haven't even looked like members of the same species without their make-up... and one of them might have actually been a guy when it comes right down to it, but that's for another thread... chicks NEED make-up. That's not being unkind, that's just how it is.

 

Where's her whore-lashes and cartoon eyebrows?

 

Where's the lipstick that makes her look like she was eating jam with a wooden spoon?

 

Where's the orange foundation and the airbrushed cheeks that make her look like an Oompa-Loompa that just ran upstairs carrying a box of bricks?

 

Now if there's ANY reason for banning this, let's be fair... VERY acceptable whore... from your nightclub then it's because she's completely forgotten that she looks like Droopy with her miserable, hang dog expression.

 

I can understand her looking unhappy.. a slutty without place to slut is like a beautiful butterfly without a flower to land on. Or, in her case, without a place to get fucked against the wall of the bogs by some bloke while she Facebooks her friends and family to tell them her status is "Getting fucked against the wall of the bogs by some bloke. lol!!!!!"

 

Of course by now I've forgotten what my point might have been, assuming I actually started out with a point in mind.

 

Anyway, I'm not saying I want her to look like the Widow Twanky... I'm just saying I'd prefer her if she looked like the Widow Twanky.

 

[dervish]

I can understand her looking unhappy.. a slutty without place to slut is like a beautiful butterfly without a flower to land on. Or, in her case, without a place to get fucked against the wall of the bogs by some bloke while she Facebooks her friends and family to tell them her status is "Getting fucked against the wall of the bogs by some bloke. lol!!!!!"

 

 

funny cos it's true!

[Betty Swallicks]

No way she is 28.

 

I wid tho.

 

Horrible coupon, decent bod, poor clize.

[OddJob]

First thing i thought when i saw her photo:

 

she is not 28