The Boofon Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 Get fired in tonight. :ninja: 1.Fair fa' your honest, sonsie face,Great chieftain o' the puddin-race!Aboon them a' ye tak your place,Painch, tripe, or thairm:Weel are ye wordy of a graceAs lang's my arm.2.The groaning trencher there ye fill,Your hudies like a distant hill,Your pin wad help to mend a millIn time o' need,While thro' your pores the dews distilLike amber bead.3.His knife see rustic Labour dight,An' cut ye up wi' ready slight,Trenching your gushing entrails bright,Like onie ditch;And then, O what a glorious sight,Warm-reeking, rich!4.Then horn for horn, they stretch an' strive:Deil tak the hindmost, on they drive,Till a' their weel-swall'd kytes belyveAre bent like drums;Then auld Guidman, maist like to rive,'Bethankit!' hums.5.Is there that owre his French ragout,Or olio that wad staw a sow,Or fricassee wad mak her spewWi perfect scunner,Looks down wi' sneering, scornfu' viewOn sic a dinner?6.Poor devil! see him owre his trash,As fecl;ess as a wither'd rash,His spindle shank a guid whip-lash,His nieve a nit;Tho' bluidy flood or field to dash,O how unfit.7.But mark the Rustic, haggis-fed,The trembling earth resounds his tread,Clap in his walie nieve a blade,He'll make it whistle;An' legs, an' arms, an' heads will snedLike taps o' thrissle.8.Ye pow'rs, wha mak mankind your care,And dish them out their bill o' fare,Auld Scotland wants nae skinking ware,That jaups in luggies;But if ye wish her gratfu' prayer,Gie her a Haggis! Link to comment
BrianFaePerth Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 Eh love haggis, but it's kinda in short supply roond these parts. Eh'll content myself wi a few drams Link to comment
Redmist1903 Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 I'll tell you what I love haggis but have had a few shite haggis's from butchers recently. I tried one of that 'award winning' ones from the butchers at Huntly it was dry tasteless shite. Kintore butcher = dry tastless shite. Inverurie butcher = dry tasteless shite. Believe it or not the best haggis I have had recently was one of those McSween things from Costco, salty, spicy and tasty as fuck,a real treat, lovely. The butcher at the top of Rosehill Drive does a good one also. Link to comment
tup Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 Fuck Robert Burns. I'll eat whatever the fuck I want tonight, and I won't be piping it onto the denner table, like a dramatic spastic. Nor will I be wearing a Jimmy wig when I eat it. Fuck all that twee pish. Link to comment
NorthernLights24 Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 I'm having haggis, neeps and tatties for lunch and I'm really looking forward to it Link to comment
Crossbow Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 I'll be having haggis tonight - we often do - McSween haggis nice and spicy - their veggie version is also good in a nutty way. Link to comment
Redmist1903 Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 Fuck Robert Burns. I'll eat whatever the fuck I want tonight, and I won't be piping it onto the denner table, like a dramatic spastic. Nor will I be wearing a Jimmy wig when I eat it. Fuck all that twee pish. I'll nae be piping it into the denner table neither but surely the wearing of a see you Jimmy hat is mandatory? Link to comment
Bluto10 Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 Fuck Robert Burns. I'll eat whatever the fuck I want tonight, and I won't be piping it onto the denner table, like a dramatic spastic. Nor will I be wearing a Jimmy wig when I eat it. Fuck all that twee pish. poor show tup. poor. Link to comment
BrianFaePerth Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 poor show tup. poor. Totally agree, abody kens the politcally correct word is retard. Link to comment
tightbreeks Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 tups got a point, burns probably wouldn't agree with all this brig-a-doon sideshow. Link to comment
tup Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 Why the fuck are we 'celebrating' some dandy fae anither century? Poetry is pish, for poofs. Easy to put together a few verses of utter crap when you're smashed out your skull. Link to comment
tightbreeks Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 tup, write, sorry, compose a poem for sky promoting a super sunday with man utd v chelsea and oooh let's say citeh v liverpool in the game after. the music could be by massive attack Link to comment
tup Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 Anyone care to explain why we have a 'Burns' night? Why not a 'Thomas Telford' day? Or an 'Adam Smith' one? Both of the above did more for Scotland than Robert fucking Burns ever managed. But of course thesps rule the roost in bourgeois Edinburgh, laughable. Fuck celebrating that havering cunt. Link to comment
BrianFaePerth Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 Anyone care to explain why we have a 'Burns' night? Why not a 'Thomas Telford' day? Or an 'Adam Smith' one? Both of the above did more for Scotland than Robert fucking Burns ever managed. But of course thesps rule the roost in bourgeois Edinburgh, laughable. Fuck celebrating that havering cunt. Doesnae even rhyme Link to comment
tightbreeks Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 very sylvia plath tup, like it hows about a haiku? Link to comment
tup Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 Nor does Burnses shite. He was out his box on opium when he wrote it. It does nothing for me all that crap, and I certainly won't be toasting it by eating something as disgusting as a haggis. It makes us a laughing stock as a nation this carryon. Link to comment
tup Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 Australia Day the morn I'll be having a pie. Adam Smith??? Jesus min clearly the imbecility of the Aussies is rubbing off on you. Link to comment
The Boofon Posted January 25, 2012 Author Share Posted January 25, 2012 Anyone care to explain why we have a 'Burns' night? Why not a 'Thomas Telford' day? Or an 'Adam Smith' one? Both of the above did more for Scotland than Robert fucking Burns ever managed. But of course thesps rule the roost in bourgeois Edinburgh, laughable. Fuck celebrating that havering cunt. Doesnae even rhyme :hysterical: Link to comment
The Boofon Posted January 25, 2012 Author Share Posted January 25, 2012 Anyone care to explain why we have a 'Burns' night? Why not a 'Thomas Telford' day? I thought you were wary of masons? Link to comment
tup Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 I thought you were wary of masons? Not wary of them at all, hate them, big difference. Link to comment
The Boofon Posted January 25, 2012 Author Share Posted January 25, 2012 Not wary of them at all, hate them, big difference. Why do you like Thomas Telford then sherlock? Thomas Telford was born the son of a shepherd near Langholm in the Scottish Borders. At the age of 14 he became an apprentice stonemason in Edinburgh. In 1782 Telford moved to London to work on Somerset House and in 1784 he was managing the construction works at Portsmouth Dockyard. In 1788, he was appointed Surveyor of Public Works in Shropshire. He returned to Scotland in 1790 to survey harbours and piers on behalf of the British Fisheries Society, for whom he had designed Ullapool in 1788, but by 1793 was back in Shropshire, building the Ellsmere Canal. Telford's works can be seen all over Europe: they include a canal in the English midlands, canal tunnels in the north country, the Gota Canal in Sweden; St. Katherine Docks in London and roads that opened up the Scottish Highlands. If any Scot made a difference to countless generations, it surely was Thomas Telford. His work in improving highways and bridges, canals and road made much of the Industrial Revolution possible. Thomas Telford was an active Freemason, and whilst it is not certain in which Lodge he was initiated, the Phoenix Lodge No. 257 in Portsmouth is probably the Lodge he first saw light. He later joined Lodge Salopian No. 525 in 1788 and would hold the position of Senior Warden, and later become the Lodge treasurer. Cannongate Kilwinning is probably the lodge he was most associated with, although in 1786 whilst in Portsmouth he states, 'he is taking great delight in Freemasonry, and is about to have a lodge-room at the George Inn fitted up after his plans and under his direction.' Link to comment
StandFree1982 Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 Spicy Haggis Pouch Don't think we'll be having haggis the night though. Link to comment
a don in oz Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 No haggis and a couple of days late but on Friday will take a drive to the Scottish butcher lad and get some mealie puddings and make mince, mealie and tatties for Friday dinner. That is if the place isn't flooded to shit by then. Link to comment
tup Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 Why do you like Thomas Telford then sherlock? I never said I liked him, I said why not have a day for the handshaking cunt? Makes as much sense as a Burns night. Link to comment
The Boofon Posted January 25, 2012 Author Share Posted January 25, 2012 I never said I liked him, I said why not have a day for the handshaking cunt? Makes as much sense as a Burns night. What would you eat on a Thomas Telford night? Link to comment
a don in oz Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 Nah nah. Shit poetry trumps capitalist pigdoggery and good roads and bridges anyday. Link to comment
tup Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 What would you eat on a Thomas Telford night? Roadkill. Link to comment
tup Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 Nah nah. Shit poetry trumps capitalist pigdoggery and good roads and bridges anyday. Celebrating either, now, hundreds of years later, is bizarre. That's my point. Link to comment
The Boofon Posted January 25, 2012 Author Share Posted January 25, 2012 Celebrating either, now, hundreds of years later, is bizarre. That's my point. How was your Christmas? Link to comment
tup Posted January 25, 2012 Share Posted January 25, 2012 How was your Christmas? Pish. Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now