Shittiest Job In The World

[Ke1t]

There's some law here that prevents businesses sticking signs up on the grass at the side of the road. Understandable, because when few pedestrians there are would have their egress impeded by big fucking signs.

 

What there ISN'T a law against is putting your sign down next to you if you just happen to be standing on the grass verge by the side of the road.

 

So for a long while you would see a sign by the side of the road, and next to it was some homeless dude who was being paid like a buck an hour to stand next to the sign. That was his job... standing in the proximity of a sign. Not particularly challenging work, but hey, getting paid to stand?

 

Anyway, that wasn't good enough for some businesses, and so they then demanded that their homeless employees hold a sign aloft and walk up and down the street advertising their product.

 

And then, shit, if you're going to have a homeless guy to hold your sign then why not dress the fucker up in a stupid costume? I mean, what's more high visibility than a homeless guy with a sign? A homeless guy with a sign in a Yosimite Sam costume!

 

Anyway, we've been having all blizzards and shit the last couple of days, and at the end of our road there's a main street that leads to a bunch of businesses.. and it seems the tobacconist in the strip mall has waited for the shittiest weather of the year in order to advertise their fags... because there's been some homeless dude walking up and down the street advertising 'FAGS! CHEAP!", and doing so while forced to wear a giant foam cowboy hat.

 

I don't even see the connection between fags and cowboy hats, and I've concluded that the dude who owns the tobacconist just wants to humiliate a homeless guy.

 

That then got me to thinking that maybe Millertime and his advanced Dolphin society isn't so crazy after all.

 

I mean, take out the tuna net situation, and what do you have?

 

Zero homelessness. Zero unemployment. You don't see dolphins standing in line for a taxi then getting jumped by some twats of dolphins who can't handle their shandy. How many dolphins are in prison?

 

How many dolphins have you seen washed up on the beach, holding a sign offering "CHEAP FAGS" and wearing a giant foam cowboy hat in freezing blizzards?

 

[The Boofon]

There's some law here that prevents businesses sticking signs up on the grass at the side of the road. Understandable, because when few pedestrians there are would have their egress impeded by big fucking signs.

 

What there ISN'T a law against is putting your sign down next to you if you just happen to be standing on the grass verge by the side of the road.

 

So for a long while you would see a sign by the side of the road, and next to it was some homeless dude who was being paid like a buck an hour to stand next to the sign. That was his job... standing in the proximity of a sign. Not particularly challenging work, but hey, getting paid to stand?

 

Anyway, that wasn't good enough for some businesses, and so they then demanded that their homeless employees hold a sign aloft and walk up and down the street advertising their product.

 

And then, shit, if you're going to have a homeless guy to hold your sign then why not dress the fucker up in a stupid costume? I mean, what's more high visibility than a homeless guy with a sign? A homeless guy with a sign in a Yosimite Sam costume!

 

Anyway, we've been having all blizzards and shit the last couple of days, and at the end of our road there's a main street that leads to a bunch of businesses.. and it seems the tobacconist in the strip mall has waited for the shittiest weather of the year in order to advertise their fags... because there's been some homeless dude walking up and down the street advertising 'FAGS! CHEAP!", and doing so while forced to wear a giant foam cowboy hat.

 

I don't even see the connection between fags and cowboy hats concluded that the dude who owns the tobacconist just wants to humiliate a homeless guy.

 

That then got me to thinking that maybe Millertime and his advanced Dolphin society isn't so crazy after all.

 

I mean, take out the tuna net situation, and what do you have?

 

Zero homelessness. Zero unemployment. You don't see dolphins standing in line for a taxi then getting jumped by some twats of dolphins who can't handle their shandy. How many dolphins are in prison?

 

How many dolphins have you seen washed up on the beach, holding a sign offering "CHEAP FAGS" and wearing a giant foam cowboy hat in freezing blizzards?

 

 

I've given this dolphin thing some thought. The only thing fucking them up is getting caught in tuna nets.

 

What they need to do is get the tuna to evolve so they're 100 feet tall and 200 feet long.

 

No more getting stuck in nets.

 

Did you make that picture or is it a dolphin at Sea World Detroit?

[looksgoodinred]

it might be a shitty job, but some days, it would be preferable to others.

aside from the strange headgear, it IS low stress. you just have to make sure your sign doesn't blow away or get stolen. and stand there. i think i could do that.

[Dom Sullivan]

There's some law here that prevents businesses sticking signs up on the grass at the side of the road. Understandable, because when few pedestrians there are would have their egress impeded by big fucking signs.

What there ISN'T a law against is putting your sign down next to you if you just happen to be standing on the grass verge by the side of the road.

 

So for a long while you would see a sign by the side of the road, and next to it was some homeless dude who was being paid like a buck an hour to stand next to the sign. That was his job... standing in the proximity of a sign. Not particularly challenging work, but hey, getting paid to stand?

 

Anyway, that wasn't good enough for some businesses, and so they then demanded that their homeless employees hold a sign aloft and walk up and down the street advertising their product.

 

And then, shit, if you're going to have a homeless guy to hold your sign then why not dress the fucker up in a stupid costume? I mean, what's more high visibility than a homeless guy with a sign? A homeless guy with a sign in a Yosimite Sam costume!

 

Anyway, we've been having all blizzards and shit the last couple of days, and at the end of our road there's a main street that leads to a bunch of businesses.. and it seems the tobacconist in the strip mall has waited for the shittiest weather of the year in order to advertise their fags... because there's been some homeless dude walking up and down the street advertising 'FAGS! CHEAP!", and doing so while forced to wear a giant foam cowboy hat.

 

I don't even see the connection between fags and cowboy hats, and I've concluded that the dude who owns the tobacconist just wants to humiliate a homeless guy.

 

That then got me to thinking that maybe Millertime and his advanced Dolphin society isn't so crazy after all.

 

I mean, take out the tuna net situation, and what do you have?

 

Zero homelessness. Zero unemployment. You don't see dolphins standing in line for a taxi then getting jumped by some twats of dolphins who can't handle their shandy. How many dolphins are in prison?

 

How many dolphins have you seen washed up on the beach, holding a sign offering "CHEAP FAGS" and wearing a giant foam cowboy hat in freezing blizzards?

 

I always wondered why when in FLA there are Dudes waving signs for the sunglasses store at you as you drive by at the height of the day.

 

Always wondered why they didn't just plant the sign in the grass then go for a beer.

 

You are a veritable font of knowledge Mr K.

 

You have enlightened me

[Jones]

the connection between fags and cowboy hats

 

John Wayne was gay...

[Ke1t]

I always wondered why when in FLA there are Dudes waving signs for the sunglasses store at you as you drive by at the height of the day.

 

Always wondered why they didn't just plant the sign in the grass then go for a beer.

 

You are a veritable font of knowledge Mr K.

 

You have enlightened me

 

Oh aye, I'm Mr Knowledge, me.

 

Battle of Bannockburn.. 1314. See that? Didnae even have to look it up.

 

First four minute mile, Roger Bannister.

 

My favourite mode of transport... the car. Boom... nothing I don't know.

 

Anyway, as an addendum, I thought it might be interesting to film the poor bastard in order to give you all a look at what happens when you don't stick in at school, but all you get is a brief glimpse of hat guy, me wheelspinning across the icy junction as I realise I'm sitting at a green light, and the wife getting me into trouble for wheelspinning across the icy junction.

 

Such is the exciting, high-powered life Kelt lives.... for a glimpse of that exciting life see below

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HDQF-3SsyR4

[daytripping]

You wear chinos.

[Ke1t]

You wear chinos.

 

Those are cargo pants, min... lots of pockets for computer components and wee screwdrivers.

 

[daytripping]

Those are cargo pants, min... lots of pockets for computer components and wee screwdrivers.

 

 

I believe yeh Kelt, M16 in the big hipster pocket nae doot.

 

In Aiberdeen we call em gay chinos.

[tommo1903]

Cargo pants are chinos lazy older brother.

 

They aren't as gay, but thats like saying David Murray isnt as disabled as Helen Keller.

[Ke1t]

I believe yeh Kelt, M16 in the big hipster pocket nae doot.

 

In Aiberdeen we call em gay chinos.

 

I refer you to the thread of November last year, 'What's Your Dress Style' for confirmation.

 

:thumbs:

 

Kelt's Gear

[Ke1t]

Cargo pants are chinos lazy older brother.

 

They aren't as gay, but thats like saying David Murray isnt as disabled as Helen Keller.

 

Bollocks... cargo pants are the shit. They're the Arnold Schwarzenegger of men's breeks, and show jeans up for the blatant faggotry that they are.

 

I know I'm going to upset a lot of people here, but jeans are for the homeless, the poor, and queerbait... and that's just basic science.

[tommo1903]

Bollocks... cargo pants are the shit. They're the Arnold Schwarzenegger of men's breeks, and show jeans up for the blatant faggotry that they are.

 

I know I'm going to upset a lot of people here, but jeans are for the homeless, the poor, and queerbait... and that's just basic science.

 

I have cargo shorts for festivals. Excellent for hiding beer in. Just that cargo pants look like chinos, and chinos are for poofs.

 

Jeans are better, as they cost hundreds of pounds and look well cool, innit.

[BrianFaePerth]

At least ye edited the video so we didnae have tae see ye tugging yerself while looking at thon homeless cowboy.