Ke1t Posted August 17, 2012 Share Posted August 17, 2012 currently watching a bunch of souped up open back trucks belting round in a big circle at 200 mph. This is shite... Me and the loon own about 50% of all the teeth for a 2 mile radius. I am king of dental hygiene here! Anyone need any redneck shit, while I'm here? Link to comment
granite sheep Posted August 17, 2012 Share Posted August 17, 2012 Correct me if I'm wrong, but is NASCAR just nae the big budget Yank version o Banger Racing, like they dee at Crimond, but in a boring as fuck oval? That's nae a race, it's a procession o cars that canna handle real corners! Link to comment
dervish Posted August 17, 2012 Share Posted August 17, 2012 Show the loon what a tramp stamp and inbreeding does like a wee redneck safari. 1 Link to comment
looksgoodinred Posted August 17, 2012 Share Posted August 17, 2012 the start of the race was delayed? Denny Hamlin's starting in 11th. i'll be rooting for him. :thumbs: Link to comment
Bobby Connor Posted August 17, 2012 Share Posted August 17, 2012 Should have just bought/rented out Pixar's Cars or Cars 2. Fool. Link to comment
Ke1t Posted August 17, 2012 Author Share Posted August 17, 2012 Should have just bought/rented out Pixar's Cars or Cars 2. Fool. Loon watched Cars 2 all the way here. Just saw a couple slutties with the lowest-rider short shorts ever. Filthy, filthy slutties. Currently at Danicka Patrick's merch trailr...the filthy, filthy slutty. This is shite. Link to comment
granite sheep Posted August 17, 2012 Share Posted August 17, 2012 Should have got the Scalextrix out, however I take it you're tryin to educate the loon as the differences between an Aberdonian minker and a Yank minker...BTW, any gun tents there, wi mad survivalist types gazing lovingly at their assault weapons that Congress wouldnae mind alternatively banning/legalising? Link to comment
tutankamun Posted August 17, 2012 Share Posted August 17, 2012 Should have got the Scalextrix out, however I take it you're tryin to educate the loon as the differences between an Aberdonian minker and a Yank minker...BTW, any gun tents there, wi mad survivalist types gazing lovingly at their assault weapons that Congress wouldnae mind alternatively banning/legalising? Surely a minker is a minker is a minker in any language? Just fukin minkers. Link to comment
Bobby Connor Posted August 17, 2012 Share Posted August 17, 2012 Loon watched Cars 2 all the way here. Just saw a couple slutties with the lowest-rider short shorts ever. Filthy, filthy slutties. Currently at Danicka Patrick's merch trailr...the filthy, filthy slutty. This is shite. Sounds like the eye candy might make up for the overall shiteness. Make a move on one of them Kelt. Show yer loon some proper chat up technique. Set a good example for him and something to aspire to. Link to comment
Ke1t Posted August 17, 2012 Author Share Posted August 17, 2012 Sounds like the eye candy might make up for the overall shiteness. Barely. Just purchased a set of sportscam sunglasses. May well have capped the lowriders Link to comment
tutankamun Posted August 17, 2012 Share Posted August 17, 2012 Yankee sport is shit 2 Link to comment
tainboy Posted August 17, 2012 Share Posted August 17, 2012 Get me the most kitsch t shirt there please. I'm currently sporting a Houston livestock and rodeo bad boy. Circa 2008. Link to comment
Stoney Posted August 17, 2012 Share Posted August 17, 2012 Sorta redneck stuff we talking about here kelto? Link to comment
The Oxford Don Posted August 17, 2012 Share Posted August 17, 2012 currently watching a bunch of souped up open back trucks belting round in a big circle at 200 mph. This is shite... Me and the loon own about 50% of all the teeth for a 2 mile radius. I am king of dental hygiene here! Anyone need any redneck shit, while I'm here? Can you get me some vagisil please... thanks in advance. 1 Link to comment
Ke1t Posted August 18, 2012 Author Share Posted August 18, 2012 They had a couple of shirts that caught my eye... 'Drunk As Shit'.... Fuck me, the fatty in the Cabana ne,t to me just flashed at me... And 'God Don't Make No Trash'... The former being accurate, the latter being pretty goddamn inaccurate. Today we're at a Redneck water park, which is nice... but about half the people here are Drunk As Shit. Last i I wanted to see was some 300l b moose's bare arse. Headed home tonight... I'm just about all Rednecked out. Link to comment
Ke1t Posted August 19, 2012 Author Share Posted August 19, 2012 Final destination 6. Kelt cheats death Interesting place, the western portion of this state. Definitely full of spots you don't want your car to break down. Irish Hills being one of them. Place looks like a refugee camp, full of Pikeys in trailers and packs of wild kids and dogs, or dags. Not sure if the caravan cities are there because people live there or because they're there to watch the NASCAR... it's fucking terrible. I do know you can buy a beer and have it served to you by a chick with a fake Oirish accent, if that's your thing. Or you can go to one of the area's many abandoned theme parks... particularly Prehistoric Park. That's a cracker. It was built, I assume, to inform people about the wondrous magnificence of the age of the Dinosaur, and you could walk around the place looking at all the life size models of T-Rex and... I think one of them might have been Godzilla. Unfortunately for the park it transpires that Dinosaurs never existed, and that God merely secreted an entire fake fossil record as a test of man's faith, so that was it tatties for Irish Hills' attempt at Jurassic Park. I've also figured out why Rednecks always seem to be trying to start a fight. NASCAR renders you stone fucking deaf after 10 minutes. So when some toothless fuck in an 'Evolution Sucks' T-Shirt says to you, "What's that yo sayin', Boy.?" It's because he genuinely can't hear a fucking word you're saying. Link to comment
looksgoodinred Posted August 29, 2016 Share Posted August 29, 2016 Amber Balcaen. The 24-year-old dirt racer from Winnipeg made history this weekend becoming the first Canadian-born woman to win a NASCAR-sanctioned race in the United States. http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/manitoba/amber-balcaen-makes-history-1.3739229 1 Link to comment
Clydeside_Sheep Posted August 29, 2016 Share Posted August 29, 2016 Amber Balcaen. A fine looking young lady. Link to comment
looksgoodinred Posted August 29, 2016 Share Posted August 29, 2016 A fine looking young lady. but more to the point, talented and successful at what she loves to do. Link to comment
Poodler Posted August 29, 2016 Share Posted August 29, 2016 Whatever happened to Kelt? Link to comment
Redstar Posted August 29, 2016 Share Posted August 29, 2016 Whatever happened to Kelt?Crystal Meth would be my guess...that or been shot for smart mouthing some cunt. Link to comment
Bluto10 Posted August 29, 2016 Share Posted August 29, 2016 maybe mistaken for a gang member by the police in his his cat boots and combat trousers. Link to comment
dave_min Posted August 29, 2016 Share Posted August 29, 2016 Maybe he's got a job washing dishes in a hotel kitchen. Link to comment
Bluto10 Posted August 29, 2016 Share Posted August 29, 2016 Father Ted.Who is incidentally Father Ted. Link to comment
Bluto10 Posted August 29, 2016 Share Posted August 29, 2016 Maybe he's got a job washing dishes in a hotel kitchen.Your banter is sub-potman level. 3 Link to comment
Clydeside_Sheep Posted August 29, 2016 Share Posted August 29, 2016 but more to the point, talented and successful at what she loves to do. I knew you would say that if I commented on her looks But of course I agree. Power steering has indeed made motorsport a level playing field for the sexes. I hope they put a bag of sand in her car, to make up for the fact that women are lighter than men! Link to comment
Clydeside_Sheep Posted August 29, 2016 Share Posted August 29, 2016 Whatever happened to Kelt? I miss him, but am sure he will be back. I am guessing one of the following: - busy- jail- hold up in the woods with some red neck militia he has joined Link to comment
The Cockney Don Posted August 29, 2016 Share Posted August 29, 2016 I too hope Kelt is ok, hopefully just on a break from here. Link to comment
King Street Loon Posted August 29, 2016 Share Posted August 29, 2016 Didn't even notice he'd gone. 1 Link to comment
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