There's Summing No Richt Aboot This Place.

[Jigot]

I am working at a couple of hamlets on the East shore of Loch Lomond at the present time and at this time of year it's braw right enough but I can't get rid of the feeling of unease up there.The folk are weird like,baking you a never ending supply of scones and pouring you a river of tea.I just can't shift the feeling of dread,like we are getting "fattened up"for their next burnt offering or live sacrifice.

Should I cut out the scones or smoking skunk or both?

[fatshaft]

I get like that whenever I am in Alford.

[Ke1t]

Yeah, be very, very wary of over-friendly types.

 

Personally I maintain a demeanour of complete stand-offishness around new people, unless we're out drinking... in which case I'm the first one with the traffic cone on his heid and showing everyone my 'Elephant'...

 

But these people who are super-friendly and asking to do shit for you without solicitation... "Let me get that for you." and "Oh, I'll do that, you put your feet up" and "Have a jam sandwich"... they're the fuckers I hate and want nothing to do with.

 

Perfect example, my wife makes friends with pretty much anyone with a pulse... and tomorrow she has to look after someone's dog for a week.

 

"Felicity asked if we can look after her dog. Is that okay" says the wife at the weekend.

 

"Nope." I says, "I'm not looking after anyone's dog. Feel free to look after it all by yourself, though."

 

And thus it shall be.... she'll be taking it for walks and picking up its shite, and feeding it and cleaning up after it.

 

It better stay out of my fucking way.

 

Anyway, don't accept their hospitality... they're at it.

[King Street Loon]

You don't like dogs do you kelt.

[Jigot]

Yeah, be very, very wary of over-friendly types.

 

Personally I maintain a demeanour of complete stand-offishness around new people, unless we're out drinking... in which case I'm the first one with the traffic cone on his heid and showing everyone my 'Elephant'...

 

But these people who are super-friendly and asking to do shit for you without solicitation... "Let me get that for you." and "Oh, I'll do that, you put your feet up" and "Have a jam sandwich"... they're the fuckers I hate and want nothing to do with.

 

Perfect example, my wife makes friends with pretty much anyone with a pulse... and tomorrow she has to look after someone's dog for a week.

 

"Felicity asked if we can look after her dog. Is that okay" says the wife at the weekend.

 

"Nope." I says, "I'm not looking after anyone's dog. Feel free to look after it all by yourself, though."

 

And thus it shall be.... she'll be taking it for walks and picking up its shite, and feeding it and cleaning up after it.

 

It better stay out of my fucking way.

 

Anyway, don't accept their hospitality... they're at it.

Oh aye they're at it,every morning we return, the skip (dumpster)is vacant of the auld timber we put into the cunt the day before.They just have to say and we would stack it on the deck.It would(nae pun intended)save them fae clambouring in a skip with nails hingin oot every where.They all deny it,it's fucking wierd that's all.

Talking about the weekend,one of my wife's Aunties popped her clogs there and has the audacity to be cremated on Saturday! I telt the wife I'll take her but we'll no be gaun fer cups o'tea and curly-up-at-the-corner pieces as I've got the fitba at 3 o'clock.

[Bluto10]

bad mobbys bedroom. some queer shit goes on in there im sure of it

[360]

bad mobbys bedroom. some queer shit goes on in there im sure of it

 

This from personal experience or from your wet dream?

[zander]

Me and my mates speaking tonight of going up to Shetland or Orkney for a weekend, iv only ever been on Shetland going offshore and that was at Scatsta and Sumburgh.

 

Is it safe enough?

[jassb]

The Wicker Man springs to mind.

[Bluto10]

why anyo e would live even further from noth beyond aberdeen is beyond me.

 

to get to edinburgh which itself is isolated takes two hours. and thats in one of the smalles countries around.

 

i u dersta d the lure of the countryside but north of aberdeen? theres a rwaon tourists dinna go there

[zander]

Whenever in Inverness or north of it, man it gives me the heebie jeebies.

 

Tain, Brora, Golspie, Dornoch, Alness, Invergordon - all fucked up.

 

In fact, everywhere north is fucked up, Zetland being coldly odd. They tell me Orkney is lovely but how can it be?

 

Nairn is another creepsville. Buckie is weird, Keith is shite, as is Huntly. Dyce is the pits.

 

One of my mates is Orcadian orgins hes slightly weird can imagine his relations being of that sort. I've the folk in Shetland are friendly and will invite you to parties and such like maybe that comes under the over friendliness of them to watch out for.

 

That said they surely can't be worse than towns in the north east Banff,Broch etc who hate all outsiders.

[Jigot]

Whenever in Inverness or north of it, man it gives me the heebie jeebies.

 

Tain, Brora, Golspie, Dornoch, Alness, Invergordon - all fucked up.

 

In fact, everywhere north is fucked up, Zetland being coldly odd. They tell me Orkney is lovely but how can it be?

 

Nairn is another creepsville. Buckie is weird, Keith is shite, as is Huntly. Dyce is the pits.

I've only been to Huntly on your list but I agree,the road there from Aberdeen is marginally better than arriving.

[minijc]

Inverurie, was on a boogie bus out to there, as soon as I walked off the bus, two boys outside the pub go "Check this fucking prick" then I had to endure 5 minutes of them eye balling me inside the bar, so I left.

[Bluto10]

Inverurie, was on a boogie bus out to there, as soon as I walked off the bus, two boys outside the pub go "Check this fucking prick" then I had to endure 5 minutes of them eye balling me inside the bar, so I left.

 

why didnt you take them?

 

idve battered them

[Nig]

Inverurie, was on a boogie bus out to there, as soon as I walked off the bus, two boys outside the pub go "Check this fucking prick" then I had to endure 5 minutes of them eye balling me inside the bar, so I left.

 

 

To be fair, that happens no matter where you go......

[Jigot]

One of my mates is Orcadian orgins hes slightly weird can imagine his relations being of that sort. I've the folk in Shetland are friendly and will invite you to parties and such like maybe that comes under the over friendliness of them to watch out for.

 

That said they surely can't be worse than towns in the north east Banff,Broch etc who hate all outsiders.

My mate used to go out with an Orcadian teacher,she was known as "the nutter wi' the putter"a fuckin fruit loop.He used to come to my hoose for a nights sleep,away from the phones ringing and his door getting chapped all oors.

[zander]

Inverurie, was on a boogie bus out to there, as soon as I walked off the bus, two boys outside the pub go "Check this fucking prick" then I had to endure 5 minutes of them eye balling me inside the bar, so I left.

 

Sounds like the majority of North East towns

[Ke1t]

Sounds like the majority of North East towns

 

Not least Aberdeen.

[Jigot]

Sounds like the majority of North East towns

The wee mining touns doon here can be an eyeopener.Tribal springs to mind and every cunt wants to ken "waur yer fae"

If you lived in one and your mum won a fiver at the Miners Welfare bingo,the time she got hame her winnings would have inflated to Euro-millions jackpot through gossip and the grapevine/tomtoms.

[zander]

Here's one that will surprise many. St Andrews. It seduces tourists, the R & A is the centre of the golfing universe and the courses are sheer magic and university life is heaven for the Ok Yah crowd, mostly from England but there's summin nae right aboot yon place if you live there. I reckon it's got something to do with the reformation and killing folk way back then but the crusty whole-life residents are a weird breed of shit and most of the inabootcomers aren't worth knowing.

 

I put it down to being Fife. It is essentially posh Fife maybe not utter shit holes like Methil and Cowdenbeath but still full of fucking weirdos.

[ChutneyLove]

Ok, I'll narrow it down a bit from a city, town or village ....

 

Top floor of Espionage.

 

Something nae quite richt there.

 

[Bluto10]

bad mobbys local.

a poofs bar for ugly folk.

[Jigot]

Gamrie. Try saying Jesus was a sausage like Malky Mac did. Then you'll see how fucked up they are. Da like Turra either.

In the arsehole of Scotland that is Stranraer they talk like this cunt,Scots-Pikey.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IaadphJyy50

[BrianFaePerth]

New Berlin in upper New York state.

 

Simply the weirdest place eh have ever been, it looked like the set for yer stereotypical 80s horror movie

[diamondsr4ever]

New Berlin in upper New York state.

 

Simply the weirdest place eh have ever been, it looked like the set for yer stereotypical 80s horror movie

 

theres so many places that have the hammer house of horror feel that once you are there you wil never leave, hotel california-esque!

 

Lerwick after midnight on a weekday night, is the weirdest place I have ever encountered.....

[ChutneyLove]

theres so many places that have the hammer house of horror feel that once you are there you wil never leave, hotel california-esque!

 

Lerwick after midnight on a weekday night, is the weirdest place I have ever encountered.....

Maybe it's an island thing. Anyone ever been to Stornoway at a weekend? After the pubs close everyone congregates in the wee pedestrianised triangle bit between the shore and the harbour ..... and just stands there. Loads of people, nae much noise - very weird. Remember the first time I was there - I thought it was the meeting point for a party or something. People eventually just drift off. This was over twenty years ago - it might have changed by now.

[Dandyesque]

Most of the place listed, I have found to be friendly and welcoming.

 

Maybe it's just the Aberdeen accent which is not appreciated? Or perhaps you lot are just freaked out by friendliness? Certainly not something you'd experience too much at home given how miserable and grippit most of the city's fowk are.

[BrianFaePerth]

Most of the place listed, I have found to be friendly and welcoming.

 

Maybe it's just the Aberdeen accent which is not appreciated? Or perhaps you lot are just freaked out by friendliness? Certainly not something you'd experience too much at home given how miserable and grippit most of the city's fowk are.

 

 

Maybe you are a weirdo too and jist fit right in?

[Henry]

Me and my mates speaking tonight of going up to Shetland or Orkney for a weekend, iv only ever been on Shetland going offshore and that was at Scatsta and Sumburgh.

 

Is it safe enough?

 

I'm sure you'll survive

 

 

 

[Dynamo]

Most of the place listed, I have found to be friendly and welcoming.

 

Maybe it's just the Aberdeen accent which is not appreciated? Or perhaps you lot are just freaked out by friendliness? Certainly not something you'd experience too much at home given how miserable and grippit most of the city's fowk are.

 

True. Stonehaven especially I thought was decent enough. The beach is not bad and the wee harbour bit has a good couple of pubs.

 

I'll give them Gamrie though, strange, strange place.