Quality Journalism

[Foster14]

Being a regular reader of the BBC and Evening Express websites, it is not unusual to come across some terribly incorrect or laughable attempts at journalism. Thought I'd start a thread to share our favourites. Today, I am going to start with a terrible story of beef thievery from a local store, called The Store. My fave part of this story was the following:

 

 

The thieves made off with dozens of high quality fillet, T-bone and sirloin cuts, but left sausages and mince.

 

http://www.eveningexpress.co.uk/Article.aspx/3184354

 

I was just working my way through that story and after hearing they had stolen all the steak, my next concern was always going to be "what about the sausages and the mince?" This raises more questions than answers though. What about beefburgers? What about diced beef? Were they interested in non-beef products?

 

Seriously, it looks like it was written by a 7 year old who was just going by train of thought. Instead, it was actually two journalists collaborating and then passing it to editor for review before print. Terrible.

[Dynamo]

Being a regular reader of the BBC and Evening Express websites, it is not unusual to come across some terribly incorrect or laughable attempts at journalism. Thought I'd start a thread to share our favourites. Today, I am going to start with a terrible story of beef thievery from a local store, called The Store. My fave part of this story was the following:

 

 

The thieves made off with dozens of high quality fillet, T-bone and sirloin cuts, but left sausages and mince.

 

http://www.eveningexpress.co.uk/Article.aspx/3184354

 

I was just working my way through that story and after hearing they had stolen all the steak, my next concern was always going to be "what about the sausages and the mince?" This raises more questions than answers though. What about beefburgers? What about diced beef? Were they interested in non-beef products?

 

Seriously, it looks like it was written by a 7 year old who was just going by train of thought. Instead, it was actually two journalists collaborating and then passing it to editor for review before print. Terrible.

 

Any journalist worth his or her salt won't be working in Aberdeen, sadly.

 

It's two people's work that article. Incredible stuff going on over at Aberdeen Journals.

 

Herrow

 

The front page of a P & J last month was about how an Oil company won't let staff use milk for their cereal. I kid you not. The front fucking page

[Huntlysheep]

Must be some right hungry folk in the Foveran area.

[StandFree1982]

It's target audience are older people and families, you shouldn't expect Pulitzer price journalism from a local newspaper.

[Dynamo]

It's target audience are older people and families, you shouldn't expect Pulitzer price journalism from a local newspaper.

 

They'll always be shite if they have that attitude then. Their target area must consist of about half a million people - well the P & J anyway.

[Foster14]

It's target audience are older people and families, you shouldn't expect Pulitzer price journalism from a local newspaper.

 

My point was more that I'd have been lamented for writing a sentence like that in first year English though, not that it wasn't world class journalism.

[StandFree1982]

 

It's target audience are older people and families, you shouldn't expect Pulitzer price journalism from a local newspaper.

 

They'll always be shite if they have that attitude then. Their target area must consist of about half a million people - well the P & J anyway.

 

 

 

It's target audience are older people and families, you shouldn't expect Pulitzer price journalism from a local newspaper.

 

My point was more that I'd have been lamented for writing a sentence like that in first year English though, not that it wasn't world class journalism.

I'm not disagreeing that it's pish, I just think that it's aiming itself at an audience who like to be talked down to. People who watch / listen to newsround and watch the One Show. It's aimed at people who come home from work and just want to read headlines and not have to think too hard. The PJ is a far superior newspaper.

 

I noticed that the Sunday Post was all about the huns this week. First three pages had stories about the huns and a match report! You had to go through about 5 pages to get to the Aberdeen v Hearts game, two of the biggest clubs outside of Celtic!

 

They used to be a bit more impartial, but even they are pandering to the huns and tims.

 

Online is the way forward for news, it means you can filter out all the shite about Sevco winning their first medal and focus on things you want.

[granite sheep]

RE my post a few pages up, it's getting taken down as it was utterly bang out of order and I told a pack of utter lies. I made it all up.

 

My apologies to Aberdeen Journals and all their employees for all the hurt and offence caused.

 

Mods please keep this one up so folk can see it.

[Ke1t]

I reckon you could increase P&J/EE circulation tenfold by simply incorporating The Hat's best thread from the previous day.

 

Front page headline...

 

I'LL TURN YOUR WIFE'S FLAPS INTO A WALLET! THREATENS POPULAR POSTER.

 

Tell me you wouldn't pay your 40p* to find out what the fuck that was all about.

 

* I don't know how much they cost, that was an estimate based upon local journalistic pay averages and the current pulp paper market..

[NorthernLights24]

[Clydeside_Sheep]

Being a regular reader of the BBC and Evening Express websites, it is not unusual to come across some terribly incorrect or laughable attempts at journalism.

 

Good shout, the media in general is of a pretty poor standard.

 

I remember having a real good laugh at this "news story":

 

Couple’s fury as new bed collapses on first night

 

http://www.oldham-chronicle.co.uk/news-features/8/news/45710/couples-fury-as-new-bed-collapses-on-first-night

 

(They were not enjoying vigorous sex when this happened, rather they are both fat as f*ck.)

 

The fat man tries to blame it all on his even fatter wife - however, the gallery pics betray him as they clearly show slats broken on both sides of the bed.

 

Highlights include important details as to how the woman "spilled her milkshake" when the bed gave way and how her husband "also suffers from back problems" (malingerer!).

[caledonia]

some great ones here

https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=funny+newspaper+headlines&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ei=NPvJUsWJL6LO0AXX-IDQDg&sqi=2&ved=0CAcQ_AUoAQ&biw=1920&bih=986#imgdii=_