Humourous Car Crashes

[Clydeside_Sheep]

What humourous car crashes have you been involved in?

 

(no tragic tales of death, injury and misery, thank you)

 

I have a few up my sleeve (!) but this is the most recent:

 

At the flat I have a parking space with a bollard. The bollard is locked in place with a padlock and is removable - I keep it in the boot, when my car is in the space.

 

When I come home, my routine is usually:

 

1) Pull up in front of space with bollard present

2) Unlock bollard, remove and place in boot of car

3) Drive into the now open space

 

However, one time I did this:

 

1) Pull up in front of space with bollard present

2) Become briefly distracted

3) Drive straight into the still present bollard, like a spastic, smashing the front wing of my car

 

 

This was in front of any number of flat windows in the urban center of Glasgow. There must have been various people howling with laughter at the windows.

 

However, (after parking properly at the 2nd attempt), I just got out, locked the car and strolled off casually as if nothing was amiss. No way I was "giving them a show" by jumping up and down with rage etc.

 

I always find it takes the edge off making a c*nt of yourself, if you can 'play it cool' in this fashion

[Robbie Winters]

Where is this urban centre of Glasgow you speak of ?

Do you mean the fashionable bit ?

[Bluto10]

I play life cool CS min.

[zander]

Thats sounds fucking hilarious.

[Bluto10]

At least you didn't need an airbag cheeser min.

[Bluto10]

Lucky you didnt need some buff firefighter to cut you out of the mangled wreck

 

That would've been embarrassing

[Bluto10]

I wasn't for once making a joke about your girth there min CP min.

 

But aye your right.

 

Do they let anyone be dibble these days?

Didn't you used to have to pass test on height eyesight etc years ago?

[Bluto10]

Nah min.

They must've relaxed the rules.

 

I'm sure you get 5 foot 6 plod with specs these days

[gla5gowdon]

Nah min.

They must've relaxed the rules.

 

I'm sure you get 5 foot 6 plod with specs these days

 

TUP LIKES THIS

[Bluto10]

Haha

Good one Gdon

[spamspamspam]

What humourous car crashes have you been involved in?

 

(no tragic tales of death, injury and misery, thank you)

 

I have a few up my sleeve (!) but this is the most recent:

 

At the flat I have a parking space with a bollard. The bollard is locked in place with a padlock and is removable - I keep it in the boot, when my car is in the space.

 

When I come home, my routine is usually:

 

1) Pull up in front of space with bollard present

2) Unlock bollard, remove and place in boot of car

3) Drive into the now open space

 

However, one time I did this:

 

1) Pull up in front of space with bollard present

2) Become briefly distracted

3) Drive straight into the still present bollard, like a spastic, smashing the front wing of my car

 

 

This was in front of any number of flat windows in the urban center of Glasgow. There must have been various people howling with laughter at the windows.

 

However, (after parking properly at the 2nd attempt), I just got out, locked the car and strolled off casually as if nothing was amiss. No way I was "giving them a show" by jumping up and down with rage etc.

 

I always find it takes the edge off making a c*nt of yourself, if you can 'play it cool' in this fashion

 

 

Its just as well you have a few up your sleeve.

[Dynamo]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

 

HAHAHAHAHAHA HA

 

Why did you edit it? I was away to +1 it.

[tightbreeks]

i like the youtubes of americans showing off and getting it wrong.

 

it more often than not involves corvettes.

 

a. cheap

b. fast

c. and most important, doesn't go round corners like European sports cars do.

 

not a crash as such, but the video of the boy saying that he's going burn out his back wheels. so he gets in and burns out the clutch. it's class coz he sees the smoke and is like oh aye, check me, genius.

[Clydeside_Sheep]

Thats sounds fucking hilarious.

 

I said "humourous" not "fucking hilarious"

 

(I have learned to set the bar low on here )

[Clydeside_Sheep]

drive by perving

 

 

Like it.

Good work blaming the kid too!

[Clydeside_Sheep]

Im moderately surprised at how few humorous car crashed we have had on here.

 

Presumably everyone drives like a pensioner and holds their advanced driving test pass?

[Henry]

We're all struggling to top the hilarity of your tale.

 

I have also been to the hospital to get my sides stitched so haven't had time to post.

[Bluto10]

Harcus' afc chat posts.

[Clydeside_Sheep]

We're all struggling to top the hilarity of your tale.

 

I have also been to the hospital to get my sides stitched so haven't had time to post.

 

I see.

Edit do they have motor vehicles in Orkney?

[Henry]

Harcus' afc chat posts.

 

I'm glad you think they're humourous Bluto.

[spamspamspam]

Diana's....for the Queen.

 

 

 

That wasnt humorous whatsoever

 

 

News flashes ruined a perfectly good essential mix

[tightbreeks]

they all drive range rovers in the highlands and islands and are the happiest people in the uk.

 

and most of them want to become independent? watch as the subsidies drift south to the central belt.

 

and they love to drive up there.

[ericblack4boss]

I was in a mates car when we were approaching inveramsay bridge, when before we knew it we went into a skid caused by a pair of trousers no damage done to us or others but imagine the insurance claim form wonder if they'd had that cause of accident before.

[Poodler]

Fell asleep after nightshift and rammed a chirocco in traffic on stoneywood road last year. Funniest bit about it was I had my theatre crocs on and thought I could nip hame without changing. Had to get oot car in scrubs and crocs in rush hour traffic. Lesson learned

[DD1903]

Was there skids left on any trousers?

[Bluto10]

they all drive range rovers in the highlands and islands and are the happiest people in the uk.

.

That's cause there's no boundaries when it comes to mating.

[rumpus]

my chum Fuzzy drove into the side of a granite house on a road with no pavements.

 

The house owner came out and remonstrated quite loudly. In the ensuing fight, Fuzzy bit a chunk out of his bald head.

 

I was fined £30 for contempt of court for having an uncontrollable fit of laughter while being questioned by magistrate.

[Bluto10]

Biting in a fight is fuckib horrible

[Poodler]

Can fuzzy be quite difficult to bear sometimes?

[Bluto10]

Biting is like knife crime.

 

Can do similar damage.