Scottish Football - An Internal Problem

[Dandie1992]

Disclaimer - Look, the debate is over. It’s struggling, It’s falling behind in quality against the other European nations. We can’t qualify for shit nationally or domestically and our individuals are not valued. The excuses of it being out of our control are wrong, it’s not just because we’re Englands neighbour, or ‘We’ve only 5 million folk’, or just all the TV money. We are controllers of our own national game. Disagree? Then fuck off now and save yourself a read, cus I’m going to explain why.

I’ve been lucky enough to visit on matchday some of the great and hallowed footballing coliseums around the world. Nou Camp in the El Classico. Dortmund. The Kop against Everton. The Allianz. The Rome Derby. A wild year long fling with an Argentinian super-psycho-bitch named Valentina somehow found me seated next to her father in the Boca Juniors end at River Plate.

Holy fuck.

Atmospheres to blow your nuts to mince. Local grunnys taking their teeth out so they can shout Hispanic obscenities loud enough to make fucking sure Diego from the wrong team KNOWS he's a puta. However through all of these I’ve enjoyed the experience of being there but I’ve sat thinking it’s the same basic game and watching the actual game does nothing for me. I hand on heart would swap an El Classico for watching the 4-0 against Copenhagen in Section Y again. Or swap the Rome Derby for watching our trophy in 2014 at Celtic Park, my first. Put together a best XI from all of those world class teams and I’d still want to re-see the sight of Richie Byrne and Derek Young going in 2-1 up at half time against Bayern Munich again.

Obviously its because Aberdeen is my team and AS Roma is not. Desmond Morris had it right, that’s what football is about. Your local, hometown or national tribe beating another fucking local, hometown or national tribe.

However we in Scotland have managed to completely fuck how this works and thus break down the foundations of our national football system.

Football is built around finding out who is the best team out of any given lot, because it matters to the thousands and millions under its umbrella to have that little piece of the animal brain ticked that goes ‘My pub/side of town/town/city/country fucking dumps all over your shitty pub/side of town/town/city/country’. Without those behind it needing and caring about the animalistic need to have this via association with your team, football is a group of a dozen or so lads against the other in this vein, and football isn’t the giant business it is today.

Where this all breaks down in our country comes from when Mr. D. Weeb, who is a football fan, doesn’t care about coming to watch his hometown team see if they can beat the town further up the road. He wants to stay at home and support a team in another country he has no affiliation with, play another similar team.

For example, Mr. D. Weeb doesn't want to come to Pittodrie to watch the team represent the city he grew up in, which his parents and grandparents grew up in. He wants to watch Arsenal play Crystal Palace in the Capital One Cup. Then have a rant on Facebook titled WENGER OOT as if he’s actually a fucking Arsenal supporter.

So what is the excuse of the dweeb, the dweebs, the fucking dweebs, the motherfucking weak minded virginous dweebs, for infesting my social media with shite about Lukaku and Pogba and annoying emojis to show how excited he is about ‘his team’ signing these players, this alongside your attention seeking post from last week with the coupon you won full of foreign teams.

1) ‘Scotish fitba is fuken borin’ - Then Señor Dweeb do you really like or understand what the core essence of football is as explained above? Can you really call yourself a football fan if you simply demand nationwide drama or aesthetically pleasing football over the thrill of seeing the team you support win? Find another sport because supporting a personally unaffiliated team in another country that meets this criteria is experiencing only ever a fraction of what real football feels like.

2) ‘Canna be asked, too fuken dear’ - But you’ll pay for Sky to watch Stoke vs Huddersfield? Then moan about its contents messing up your fantasy football team. Fuck off.

3) ‘Scotish fitba jist about twa teams onywy’ - Then fight the good fight and help to change it.

Through all of this copious dweebishness, TV demand for Scottish football falls, and we (as seen on a recent Facebook post) have a lower fucking TV revenue than Norway and Switzerland themselves, while more flows to our neighbour.

Nothing wrong with having a second team, but its what your main team is that matters.

Furthermore - Business school 101, want to fix a business, look at its culture.

*See Trainspotting speech… It IS shite being Scottish.

We’re ridiculous, defeatist, moaning, thick half wits, where the acquisition of alcohol and being rich enough to drive a 4x4 in the city is more important than the acquisition of real success. As nation we’re self defeatist and more than willing to listen to the opinions of the doubters. Anyone seen to be trying to better themselves to raise themselves above the pack is brought down like a sack of tatties. 'Whats that min? You’re nae coming out on the pish with us inite and are practicing your free kicks? Fuck off you square prick. Fa do you think you are?’ Fair play to Brendan Rogers, he nailed this on the head about Scottish football. Lads aren't willing to make the sacrifices necessary, but beyond this I think its because making the necessary sacrifices to become better is looked down on by us as a culture as something negative. - This must change.

In terms of our actual football skills, we are using utterly antiquated and stone age types of tactics. Watching football in other countries first hand, even at the lower levels you ask yourself what the fuck we are doing. Blooter folk off the park and and just hoof the ball up the park seems to permeate our national game and it stems from a young age. Watched young lads of 8 training in Germany next to where I was staying. Whiteboard oot, doing attacking pattern drills and the defenders had to guess the attacking pattern and respond accordingly. Bayern U-10 team? No, a school team ffs. Doesn't take a genius to see we don't do this kind of thing.

Our standard of refereeing and just officiating is just garbage. Not talking about bias or bad calls. Refs get fucked for shite calls and decisions in every country and are accused of bias all over the world. I can't believe how slow our game runs compared to other countries leagues. Seems to be 4 times as much fouls and then 4 times as long to get the ball back moving again when that happens. Never have I seen games run with so little football being played like here.

Fuck it, rant over, in short we are fucking ourselves before we even get fucked by FIFA and UEFA’s European competition structures.

So all the moaners within the upper echelons of Scottish Football complaining about outside factors, take a long fucking look at this country first.

[RUL]

Are my eyes fucked or have you posted this in the smallest font going?

[Henry]

TL;DR

 

Pretentious shite.

[BWG]

Aye fuck reading that.

 

Fuck Glasgow

[McPhee123]

 

Edit: I have now read and agree to a certain degree Our human nature wants to belong. When we belong to a team/group of fans we are empassioned by the prospect of being the best. Folk belong to any old thing nowadays though. They belong to their smartphones, belong to their self-imporance.

 

But also, its boring, too expensive and it's only about 2 teams,

 

Kind Regards,

D Weeb

[Foster14]

Load of contradictory nonsense is about my summation of the op.

 

Complains about those not supporting Scottish football and that they can't have any reason for it, then says that all constituent parts of Scottish football are in need of repair.

 

Says there is nothing wrong about having a second team, but complains about his timeline on Facebook being filled with English football shite.

 

Complains about English football, but states "The Kop against Everton". Not Anfield. Not Liverpool. The Kop. Probably sang You'll Never Walk Alone as well...

[Old manny]

Zzzzzzzzzzzz..........

[Dynamo]

I don't think Scottish football is shite. I quite enjoy it.

It would be good if there wasn't such a big disparity between Celtic and the rest, but that's another debate.

 

There's a fascination with clubs doing well in Europe. Obviously the financial rewards are great but there's a remarkable lack of self awareness these days. Firstly there's about double the amount of countries than there used to be competing, secondly, these countries have moved into the 21st century. Your Slovenian/Slovakian/Cypriot/Macedonian/etc etc clubs weren't going to be shite forever.

[dave_min]

TL;DR

 

Pretentious shite.

+1.

[Big Hat Logan]

What a lot of pish. I couldn't care less what other teams in other countries are doing or what some school kids in Germany are up to.

 

So what exactly is the OP's point or grand idea to change wherever perceived problem he has?

[King Street Loon]

Too long, so didn't read it.

Plus I probably wouldn't care enough about the issue...whatever it is.

[maryhilldon]

Terrible post, doesn't really explain what the problem is and doesn't suggest any solutions to the problem, whatever it is?

[The Oxford Don]

If I'm reading it right, he's basically saying that Scottish football is fucked because our methods are backwards and likely to remain so owing to a combination of cultural factors and the draw of the English game, which has been artificially inflated by money from the likes of Sky, which in turn has created a new generation of highly irritating armchair fans who have zero connection to the local game.

 

Somehow, we are supposed to think that this qualifies as startling insight.

 

As opposed to, say, stating the fucking obvious.

[Pash]

Scotland is fucked therefore so is Scottish football.

 

It's a mind-set thing that will take a lifetime to correct.

[The Oxford Don]

Scotland is fucked therefore so is Scottish football.

 

It's a mind-set thing that will take a lifetime to correct.

 

He could literally just have written this, and saved us all the bother of a lengthy read.

[Dal Riata Don]

'Bout the OP - the argument that as Scotland the nation is fucked - so is her football:

 

Looking at the latests FIFA rankings [yeah, I know]

 

1. Brazil - absolute shit hole - take your life in your hands everyday there

 

2. Germany - one of the best run counties in the world

 

3. Argentina - an absolute basket case of a nation

 

4. Switzerland - one of the wealthiest nations on earth.

 

So, not much of a relationship between national development/ quality of life and footballing prowess in evidence then.

 

 

The other point is about the commercialization of the game, moving beyond local tribal rivalries.

 

This sounds pro-sectarian to me.

 

I'm proud that Aberdeen means Stand Free - free of tribal weegie pseudo-religious shite. I want that out.

 

And if you don't like the commercial side of the game now - aren't you better off with the way things are now - i.e. we don't spunk wads of cash on foreign journey men just to come and play in our league?

[BWG]

Agree regarding the technical aspects not being appreciated nor developed enough at the development stage.

 

Anyway.., the best thing is , we have choice. SUPPORT WHOEVER THE FUCK YOU LIKE.

 

Only cunts think you get a choice in who you support.

[NEM]

'Bout the OP - the argument that as Scotland the nation is fucked - so is her football:

 

Looking at the latests FIFA rankings [yeah, I know]

 

1. Brazil - absolute shit hole - take your life in your hands everyday there

 

2. Germany - one of the best run counties in the world

 

3. Argentina - an absolute basket case of a nation

 

4. Switzerland - one of the wealthiest nations on earth.

 

So, not much of a relationship between national development/ quality of life and footballing prowess in evidence then.

 

 

The other point is about the commercialization of the game, moving beyond local tribal rivalries.

 

This sounds pro-sectarian to me.

 

I'm proud that Aberdeen means Stand Free - free of tribal weegie pseudo-religious shite. I want that out.

 

And if you don't like the commercial side of the game now - aren't you better off with the way things are now - i.e. we don't spunk wads of cash on foreign journey men just to come and play in our league?

 

Sorry to break it to you but "Stand Free" is the words to a song, means fuck all else

[Bluto10]

If I'm reading it right, he's basically saying that Scottish football is fucked because our methods are backwards and likely to remain so owing to a combination of cultural factors and the draw of the English game, which has been artificially inflated by money from the likes of Sky, which in turn has created a new generation of highly irritating armchair fans who have zero connection to the local game.

 

Somehow, we are supposed to think that this qualifies as startling insight.

 

As opposed to, say, stating the fucking obvious.

 

Artificially inflated?

 

What does that empty sound bite mean exactly?

[Jessticulate]

So where do we think Scottish football should be internationally and our club sides? What state of affairs would constitute a healthy Scottish game?

[Bluto10]

Sorry to break it to you but "Stand Free" is the words to a song, means fuck all else

Lol

 

I do laugh at that

 

Folk thinking that those words mean something in the grand scheme of things or the city \ club stands for some sort of honourable ideology.

 

No pal, it's a fuckin football club.

 

 

Losers.

[beer gut]

The problem with our game is the governance. The game is ran by self interested wankers with zero vision who hate change and think every club is beholden to Secvo and Celtic. We used to produce brilliant footballers and now we struggle to produce average footballers. Why is that? You certainly wont cure it by changing the number of teams in the top league. Or by having a ridiculous league split after playing 75% of the games.

[Big Hat Logan]

The problem with our game is the governance. The game is ran by self interested wankers with zero vision who hate change and think every club is beholden to Secvo and Celtic. We used to produce brilliant footballers and now we struggle to produce average footballers. Why is that? You certainly wont cure it by changing the number of teams in the top league. Or by having a ridiculous league split after playing 75% of the games.

Can you explain how changing the size of the league and doing away with the split will see us producing brilliant footballers?

[Dal Riata Don]

 

Sorry to break it to you but "Stand Free" is the words to a song, means fuck all else

 

 

Lol

 

I do laugh at that

 

Folk thinking that those words mean something in the grand scheme of things or the city \ club stands for some sort of honourable ideology.

 

No pal, it's a fuckin football club.

 

 

Losers.

 

I'm a protestant.

 

If someone was a Dons fan and was a Catholic, it wouldn't bother me.

 

Likewise if they were a Muslim, etc etc.

 

That feeling in me wasn't created from the words of a song but that song reflects how I feel.

 

 

I'm white.

 

If someone was a Dons fan and was a black, it wouldn't bother me.

 

Likewise if they were a Asian, etc etc.

 

That feeling in me wasn't created from the words of a song but that song reflects how I feel.

 

So Stand Free means something to me because is resonates within me.

[The Oxford Don]

Artificially inflated?

 

What does that empty sound bite mean exactly?

 

I was paraphrasing the OP - something which I assumed was perfectly obvious.

 

By all means ask him what he means when he complains about Sky's impact on English football and the knock-on effect on Scottish football.

[Big Hat Logan]

 

 

 

I'm a protestant.

 

If someone was a Dons fan and was a Catholic, it wouldn't bother me.

 

Likewise if they were a Muslim, etc etc.

 

That feeling in me wasn't created from the words of a song but that song reflects how I feel.

 

 

I'm white.

 

If someone was a Dons fan and was a black, it wouldn't bother me.

 

Likewise if they were a Asian, etc etc.

 

That feeling in me wasn't created from the words of a song but that song reflects how I feel.

 

So Stand Free means something to me because is resonates within me.

Do blacks and Catholics who follow other teams bother you?

[Dal Riata Don]

Do blacks and Catholics who follow other teams bother you?

No, and I'm sorry if it came across that way.

[Bluto10]

I was paraphrasing the OP - something which I assumed was perfectly obvious.

 

By all means ask him what he means when he complains about Sky's impact on English football and the knock-on effect on Scottish football.

 

 

I'm just interested in what way is it artificially inflated?

[Big Hat Logan]

I'm just interested in what way is it artificially inflated?

I would imagine the perceived quality of it.

[Bluto10]

no sorry. Still doesn't make sense