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Schwartz Grill Mates


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Has anyone tried these? They were on promotion in Asda a month or so ago and I decided to purchase a few of them. So last two nights due to the reasonable weather, bunged a few burgers etc on the BBQ. Decided to give these a try ...... I'm impressed. The missus marinated some chicken and put them on skewers and chucked them under the grill. Tastiest chicken if had in a while.


Had Deep South Brown Sugar and Smokey Texan. Still got to try the Cajun one and won't be trying the Mojito one (Boke).


They are priced at £1 a sachet so not the cheapest but makes for a cheap meal overall if your on a budget. They are exclusive to Asda too incase anyone ends up wandering Tesco cursing me!


There are also seasonings that sound tasty and might give them a go soon.


** Topic Fucked - True AFC Chat style **

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No. Just following a logical sequence. You are what you eat. Your unborn is already taking in aspartame from diet coke and god knows what else by allowing her to ingest "mass produced shite". Give the kid a chance for fuck sake.


It's not me that's pregnant though.....

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Jeezuz. You're not even kidding either. Bait not big enough, or rather, the catch would be too small.


Well.. I WAS kidding, just a vague reference to the 'you are what you eat' comment, meaning my wife didn't try the grill mates. Even if she did try them... I'll admit I wouldn't be to overly concerned.


When you said "allow her to.." do you think I am Josef Fritzl? Sorry, no dungeons here, and I am nice enough to "allow" her to make her own choices. I'm a nice fella like that.

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Theres nothing wrong with doing any of that shit when pregnant.


Its character building for the bairn.


Smoking while pregnant stunts the growth of a baby and makes it ugly. Your mum must have been on 60 a day while carrying you being that you are a 5 foot tall ginger rotund Steven Pressley lookalike.

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Thanks for the tip J4, I'll give that stuff a go.


I use something similar for chicken, it comes with a baking bag and spices, you just put the chicken into the bag then sprinkle and shake, bobs yer uncle pop the bag in the oven and yer done, really fine.


Don't be put off by rocket, he clearly has anger/mental issues.

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If your talking about the Maggi, So Juicy then yes sir. They create a lovely juicy chicken supper.


I'm a fan.


That's the one! does exactly what it says on the packet.


Whilst rocket is mixing his spices from a dozen jars my chicken will be steaming in its own juices and getting infused by Maggi's So Juicy, simples.

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Re - dining out. P & J Saturday supplement and Tam Cowan take note.


There's nothing better than getting a meal cooked for you by a right fat bitch.


Bloaters ken their meat.


If I find myself in someplace unfamiliar, and I'm looking for scran, I look at the various options and usually go for the one which has the fattest bitch of the lot behind the counter.


If the owners are skinny, the food will be shite.

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Last time I cooked anything was almost 30 years ago. Saddest thing to be seen on supermarket shelves are these ready-made sauces for curry or for bolognaise or frozen lasagnes and pre-made other meals for one. People buying these should be shot.


Fortunately, I've not had to shoot or even threaten to shoot the wife as she's not so stupid to buy all that shite. Although if I did shoot her, I would starve so I'll need to think that one through masel.



But you do have a softness for HP broon sauce, and steak pie's from chippers...

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Dunno about the horrible, dark shit-hole that is the far wasteland of Scotland but in this part of the world, every wifie that works in a chipper these days is either grossly obese or polish. I'm thinking the obese ones are just fat bitches with zero self-discipline who eat shite all the time rather than a walking, waddling positive advert for the food quality.


I'm talking more cafes than chippers.


Fat people are indeed fat because they eat too much.


But, if you're hungry, bearing in mind the assumption is you dinna eat too much, then you can do worse than take the hostelry of the fat bitch over the skinny one.


They ken their chips and gravy.


Better that than some bitch like Gillian McKeith who sits and eats fucking roots and shoots all day but when it comes to the crunch turns out to be utterly pathetic.


Look at that fat prick that won the EuroMillions. Never mind more chins than a Japanese phone book. This cunt has a double neck!


i.e. a double chin backwards.


But he disna give a fuck. He celebrated his win with two bacon rolls ffs.


With broon sauce I reckon.

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Worse than pre-made sauces or meals, much worse, are biscuits and crisps.


A normally functioning human, when eating crisps or a biscuit, has an instinct which kicks in and says this shite isn't good for me.


The abnormal person is so satiated by the saturated fats and flavourings etc. that they carry on regardless, like the thickos that they are.


Unfortunately, the abnormals are becoming the norm in the UK with Scotland being the very worst.


As for fizzy drinks and Irn Bru in particular, that disgusting electric orange drink appeals only to the worst of minks.


Red Bull is another which is exclusive to the underclass with instinctius defunctum.



energy drinks are the preserve of minks.

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Especially given the cake quality of Scots bakers. Everything is fatty shite and we wonder why our nation is morbidly obese.


A cheeky little eclair once in a while is acceptable.


you can eat more if you get rid of it.


the reason scotland is fat, is that we are now lazy. its a society thing. nae a food issue

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