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North East Scotland


Geoff_Tipps

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You could include Peterhead and the Broach in the same bracket as Keith and Huntly. Embarrassments to normal NE people.

 

Mealy mouthed tattie picking fish stinking shitholes.

No you couldn't.

 

Keith and Huntly are inland for one and so fish stinking shitholes they are not.

 

Stick to what you know best about Rumpus. Fuck all.

 

Where the fuck is the Broach anyway you retarded multipersonality fuckwit.

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Who asked you to come along and have an opinion?

 

I may be a 'retarded mutipersonality fuckwit' but I've never squirted watery poop into my fearty pants while half naked in a cupboard.

 

How would you have handled the situation, out of interest?

 

alalam_635044093043311376_25f_4x3.jpg

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Croick Kirk is worth a visit. Very moving

 

Wrong time of year though as the days are too short.

 

Try a drive in June- Leave Inverness in the morning, off to Ullapool for lunch (clearly stopping a few times along the way) amazing fish and chips on the harbour wall - Drive round to Stac Pollaidh, one of the most beautiful mountains in Scotland.

 

Then head for Kinlochbervy and Durness - Ben Hope stands out Mount Doom or something and you'll drive past some of the most stunning scenery in the world. Hot chocolate for a fiver (worth every penny) then head along the North coast to Tongue - where you'll see Ben Loyal - arguably the best Scottish mountain - and therefore the world. You drive round it to get to the road South through Altnaharra- previously the coldest ever place in Britain.

 

Take in Loch Sinn, Lairg and Invershin falls and the back to your B&B in Inverness- nice round trip I've done in a day a few times. I've also gone the other way from Invershin and up past Elphin then back down the middle as well as going up the A9 and back down the middle. Caithness is nice and bleak the first couple of times, but gets a bit dull after a while. Sutherland, Wester Ross and Torridon are something else though

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Rocket, out of interest, could you give us a quick virtual tour of the NE border...

 

How far north, south and inland does it extend?

 

NEBorder_zps41096297.png

 

 

Huntly = kiddy-fiddling and animal-abusing paradise. Every region has it's bad bits.

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By the way, our southern border was designed such so that we teach our kids that Brechin is smelly and the inhabitants of said shit-hole know that they are most definitely not wanted in the NE.

 

Elgin and Keith should be flattened actually, and all residents exterminated. Then we can reclaim it for cattle grazing. Eventually.

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Why doesn't Stonehaven make it Rocket?

 

A very small-minded and horrible place. A diver I know used to be in charge of the doors in Aberdeen and was housed in a hotel in Stoney for 6 months. He described the town as soft but crazy. I never really got what he was saying until I battered a cunt on the sheet ice at the market square a few years ago, then I started to appreciate what he meant. There was no need for that penis to suffer a broken nose and a broken shoulder. Had it been in Aberdeen, I would not have stopped but small town, he didn't know what he was dealing with etc., I hauled him up off the deck after he got the message.

 

You know why very few retail businesses ever make it there? Because the landlords price them in cheap and squeeze them up and then out usually after a year. One of the most racist bunch of cunts you'll ever meet.

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