Kickings

[tightbreeks]

I am a master of ho no Ken, I base my technique on pressure points. So the attacker will explode if I hit one of the 256 on the body. I'm Keeping it a secret after the apocalypse. I'll be on the good side, coz I know there are others out there waiting to take advantage of ww3, and prey on the weak. I will be the saviour of this century when IT happens. You can contact me on cb radio, as modern tech. Will be deemed useless.

[tightbreeks]

Bag puss Classic, youtube it. They find a hamish and bag puss tells a story about it. Brings a tear to my eye.

[Bluto10]

He's def fishing. Gutted no-one picked him up on the other fishing attempt from yesterday re Solsbury Hill. @bluto10 

[Simply Red]

Might have known Aberdeen's hardest chino wearer would be in amongst this thread.

A damning indictment there Henry.

Lol

[dazzy_deff]

Parka and bucket hat the night @@Henry

 

Stick to yer bootcuts buddy.

[fatjim]

I'm just saying police use the term Caucasian for a white man in various TV shows n movies.

Man of European decent. Diluted to the masses as White.

Then every banjostring going gets uppity and before you know its lads are whipping off their cocks and ugly women identify as gender fluid cause nae bloke will fuck them.

Ah a fake police term.

[fatjim]

If someone boasted about punching a dog or a hire most people would be appalled. Why is it acceptable to boast about hitting people? I punched my dad once. Fucking proper belted him. He was shit faced and didn't remember it. The thought that one punch could actually kill someone is enough to keep me away from violence.

 

I didn't kill my dad.

[Henry]

Brazilian Jiu Jitsu is well-known as the gayest Jiu Jitsu. 

[dazzy_deff]

Brazilian Jiu Jitsu is well-known as the gayest Jiu Jitsu.

You would ken about gays.

[Henry]

I hope you’re hungover from last night, because that’s about the poorest insult I’ve seen written on here.

[NEM]

'Baby' Kelt just got his black belt in Karate. He's now started in on Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, and when he has a black belt in that he'll either go Krav Maga with me or Muay Thai because he likes Kick Boxing. 

 

How about your kids, big fella?

 

They still eating crayons and calling the neighbour 'Da'? 

 

 

Kids can't get a black belt in BJJ

[Poodler]

Tell that to Rolf Harris

[dazzy_deff]

I hope you’re hungover from last night, because that’s about the poorest insult I’ve seen written on here.

Inbred cunt.

 

Better?

[fatjim]

^

 

Did he have his hands down your fat pants at the time?

 

One might argue he deserved a bish bash bosh in this case certainly.

 

 

@@Dad

 

No I quite liked it when he did that.

[Ke1t]

Kids can't get a black belt in BJJ

 

He also can't get a black belt in Karate, technically. 

 

He has what's known as a Junior Black Belt, since he's progressed to the level required of a black belt, and he has that until he's old enough to test out for his adult belt. I believe that's 16. 

 

In  BJJ there are junior ranks too, so until he's 16 he can only acquire Junior belts, after which he can progress in adult ranks, and at 18 he can go for his adult black belt, assuming he graduates that quickly.

 

By 16 - 18 he should be physically capable of holding his own against bigger opponents, particularly in Krav Maga, which is the domain of thick bouncers, roid-raging cops, and psychotic ex-convicts working out anger-issues. 

[tightbreeks]

Ufc1 was ace, it was like a real life street fighter. Loved the boxer with one glove on. The Gracie brother just wrapped him up and that was that. That competition win for Gracie must've been his easiest.

 

The fat lad how got a full blown kick on the face, tooth flying, was another highlight.

[1903Fitba]

Tell that to Rolf Harris

 

 

[eeps]

'Baby' Kelt just got his black belt in Karate. He's now started in on Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, and when he has a black belt in that he'll either go Krav Maga with me or Muay Thai because he likes Kick Boxing.

 

How about your kids, big fella?

 

They still eating crayons and calling the neighbour 'Da'?

As JB said

 

'I don't know karate, I know karazor'

 

Good luck young Kelt

[eeps]

I never got a kicking but once got a bottle smashed over my head in the Pelican Club. This was a result of getting handsy with a quine while off my tits on pills, inadequate, angry boyfriend.

[eeps]

You put your stinking, unwanted, chemically sweaty, long John Leslie fingers inside a young fillys vagina and are crying victim here?

 

Aaaaaalrighty then.

Simply describing what happened, couldn't blame the poof

[eeps]

Pills make you do mental shit.

 

I mind going back to a house party with people I barely knew and allowing a young filly to sit and suck my thumb for about an hour, while her boyfriend, who was definitely the hardest and most mental cunt in the house sat there looking happy and confused all at once.

 

Then someone tried to get in the washing machine. He got headbutted later on. Nasty violence.

Stupid cunts on pills at parties could be a thread

[Bluto10]

always wondered about headbuts.

surely the guy getting butted gets a broken nose or loses teeth?

somehow that doesn’t always happen

amazes me why it doesn’t

[dazzy_deff]

A perfectly executed heatbutt is a thing of beauty.

 

I of course, am the master .

 

@@Henry

[Fridge]

It is a cheap shot but probably the most effective.

 

Would you like to step outside with some gorilla when you are clearly getting a monumental hiding.

 

Or fuck the rules and headbutt, testicular kick and runaway and hide under a car.

[Simply Red]

Administering a shit headbutt can be catastrophic for the administrator.

Seen a boy attempt to stick the heid on some big cunt outside the chipper/belmont st only to daze himself and push the big lad into psycho overdrive. Was fucking gruesome. Black pudding supper was nice tho.

[The Boofon]

As you open your bag to release the bees, only to realise they have all suffocated to death.

That was plenty. Obviously dead if they have all suffocated.

[manboobs109]

Pills make you do mental shit.

 

I mind going back to a house party with people I barely knew and allowing a young filly to sit and suck my thumb for about an hour, while her boyfriend, who was definitely the hardest and most mental cunt in the house sat there looking happy and confused all at once.

 

Then someone tried to get in the washing machine. He got headbutted later on. Nasty violence.

Haha I remember that. Same washing machine got pissed in if I mind right.

[Hagi's pubic hair]

Was it your own turd?

[Poodler]

Was it your own turd?

 

It was a transcript of his posts

[Simply Red]

It was a transcript of his posts

Meeeow