Matt Armstrong's Dog Posted May 5 Share Posted May 5 Oocha! I thought Easter had passed for the year......🤔 https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-northern-ireland-68961875 Link to comment
Parklife Posted May 5 Share Posted May 5 1 hour ago, Matt Armstrong's Dog said: , most burglars do not give a fuck about the security of a properly Well that's just nonsense. That'll be their main concern when assessing what house to target. Link to comment
For Fecks Sake Posted May 5 Share Posted May 5 43 minutes ago, Parklife said: Well that's just nonsense. That'll be their main concern when assessing what house to target. Just not taking into account if the owner has a shotgun or two handy. Link to comment
Ke1t Posted May 5 Share Posted May 5 I read somewhere that the best deterrent against burglars is a dog. Even one of the wee, shivering rat breeds like a Yorkie or a Chiuahua will give a burglar second thoughts. Not from a 'It'll tear me limb from limb' point of view, but because it'll just stand there yapping and shivering and waking the entire street up. No-one's doing their best work with that sort of racket going on, especially burglars who prefer a quiet work environment. Bigger dogs are better, because they'll back their noise up with proper violence, obviously. No need for firearms or murder. Surprised said fermer didn't have a couple of ratting dogs, at the very least. Jack Russells, or the like. Link to comment
Ando Posted May 5 Share Posted May 5 Probably should've just stabbed the ne'er-do-wells like this perfectly reasonable chap. Link to comment
Redforever86 Posted May 5 Share Posted May 5 What if he invited them round to fuck his wife, then changed his mind and just shot them when they turned up. 1 Link to comment
Redforever86 Posted May 5 Share Posted May 5 Never know these days. Some right sick fuckers out there. Link to comment
Reed or deed Posted May 5 Share Posted May 5 9 minutes ago, Redforever86 said: Never know these days. Some right sick fuckers out there. Aye and you’re one of them. Link to comment
Parklife Posted May 6 Share Posted May 6 7 hours ago, Ando said: Probably should've just stabbed the ne'er-do-wells like this perfectly reasonable chap. Donated. Falkirk. Link to comment
1903Fitba Posted May 6 Share Posted May 6 8 hours ago, Ke1t said: I read somewhere that the best deterrent against burglars is a dog. Even one of the wee, shivering rat breeds like a Yorkie or a Chiuahua will give a burglar second thoughts. Not from a 'It'll tear me limb from limb' point of view, but because it'll just stand there yapping and shivering and waking the entire street up. No-one's doing their best work with that sort of racket going on, especially burglars who prefer a quiet work environment. Bigger dogs are better, because they'll back their noise up with proper violence, obviously. No need for firearms or murder. Surprised said fermer didn't have a couple of ratting dogs, at the very least. Jack Russells, or the like. My pals Dad always used to have one of those “beware of the dog” signs on his side gate with a pic of a German shepherd on it. had two cats, never had a dog. Always used to make me chuckle. Don’t think he’s been robbed (yet) 1 Link to comment
Poodler Posted May 6 Share Posted May 6 20 minutes ago, Parklife said: Donated. Falkirk. Welcome to edgeland bro 😗 Link to comment
Matt Armstrong's Dog Posted May 6 Share Posted May 6 18 hours ago, Parklife said: Well that's just nonsense. That'll be their main concern when assessing what house to target. Nonsense? Mmm OK. So why is it that some fucking pondlife burglars don't even try to conceal their identity, or make a really pathetic attempt to do so, when breaking into a property that clearly has CCTV (whether it be evident via a yellow and black CCTV in operation sign and/or easy to spot external cameras), a fully-operational burglar alarm, and properly secured windows, doors, and other potential access points?🤔 Link to comment
Redforever86 Posted May 6 Share Posted May 6 12 hours ago, Reed or deed said: Aye and you’re one of them. I just piss on yir ma, it’s her who enjoys it. Link to comment
Don Fonte Posted May 6 Share Posted May 6 9 hours ago, Parklife said: Donated. Falkirk. Home from your holiday? Link to comment
BrisDon Posted May 6 Share Posted May 6 19 hours ago, Ke1t said: I read somewhere that the best deterrent against burglars is a dog. Even one of the wee, shivering rat breeds like a Yorkie or a Chiuahua will give a burglar second thoughts. Not from a 'It'll tear me limb from limb' point of view, but because it'll just stand there yapping and shivering and waking the entire street up. No-one's doing their best work with that sort of racket going on, especially burglars who prefer a quiet work environment. Bigger dogs are better, because they'll back their noise up with proper violence, obviously. No need for firearms or murder. Surprised said fermer didn't have a couple of ratting dogs, at the very least. Jack Russells, or the like. Pretty sure I’ve bored everyone with this story before, but we had a ‘break in’ a few years ago. It wasn’t a ‘break’ in as such as it was Queensland in summer and we had our bi-fold windows open. Fucker jumped the fence of the property behind ours which was vacant at the time. My wife caught the little shit trying to lift our car keys. She was 7 months pregnant at the time and for some reason decided to chase the cunt out and was successful although she had a nasty fall in the process. Getting to the point, we have two large (but soft as shit) dogs. They are probably temperamentally incapable of attacking a person but their bark sounds quite intimidating and they bark at everything. Many an Uber Eats driver has shat his briefs approaching our front door. On the one day in their useless lives they had a job to do, what did they do? Fuck all! Cunts slept through it like Buddhist monks. Link to comment
NEM Posted May 6 Share Posted May 6 On 5/4/2024 at 3:21 PM, Reed or deed said: Increase his security would be a start. Decent locks and CCTV is cheap nowadays. An intruder alarm is also cheap. Best advice if you confront somebody in your house under that circumstances would be to let them get on with it and go. Unless you want to take the risk of being stabbed or get life for killing somebody. What a poof 😂 5 2 1 Link to comment
Dons79 Posted May 6 Share Posted May 6 2 minutes ago, NEM said: What a poof 😂 A thought the best advice would be to turn the perp into a pin cushion but there yae go, shit it, curl up into a ball, stick thumb in mouth, gently rock back and forth whimpering mama is also an option. Link to comment
NEM Posted May 6 Share Posted May 6 2 minutes ago, Dons79 said: A thought the best advice would be to turn the perp into a pin cushion but there yae go, shit it, curl up into a ball, stick thumb in mouth, gently rock back and forth whimpering mama is also an option. Probably guide the cunt in if he caught someone shagging his Mrs 😂 1 Link to comment
Dons79 Posted May 6 Share Posted May 6 Just now, NEM said: Probably guide the cunt in if he caught someone shagging his Mrs 😂 And here is a selection of whips and chains in the chez long, sultry costumes here in the cupboard, lube on the dresser table, when will I come back?half an hour? no, of course, normal men prefer 3-4 hours ok, il see you then and if you could refrain from biting the mrs areolas region that would be grand, she doesn’t like that, thanks. whats that love, aw you do like that, enjoy. Link to comment
Redforever86 Posted May 6 Share Posted May 6 1 hour ago, Dons79 said: And here is a selection of whips and chains in the chez long, sultry costumes here in the cupboard, lube on the dresser table, when will I come back?half an hour? no, of course, normal men prefer 3-4 hours ok, il see you then and if you could refrain from biting the mrs areolas region that would be grand, she doesn’t like that, thanks. whats that love, aw you do like that, enjoy. Love Wet Leg Link to comment
Matt Armstrong's Dog Posted May 6 Share Posted May 6 3 hours ago, BrisDon said: Pretty sure I’ve bored everyone with this story before, but we had a ‘break in’ a few years ago. It wasn’t a ‘break’ in as such as it was Queensland in summer and we had our bi-fold windows open. Fucker jumped the fence of the property behind ours which was vacant at the time. My wife caught the little shit trying to lift our car keys. She was 7 months pregnant at the time and for some reason decided to chase the cunt out and was successful although she had a nasty fall in the process. Getting to the point, we have two large (but soft as shit) dogs. They are probably temperamentally incapable of attacking a person but their bark sounds quite intimidating and they bark at everything. Many an Uber Eats driver has shat his briefs approaching our front door. On the one day in their useless lives they had a job to do, what did they do? Fuck all! Cunts slept through it like Buddhist monks. Shame there weren't a couple of feisty Eastern Brown snakes in the vicinity when the louse tried to nick your car keys loon. Link to comment
Arabian Knight Posted May 6 Share Posted May 6 https://www.thescottishsun.co.uk/news/12623834/body-found-search-missing-scot-jumped-prague-river/ weege joop sparks body found efter jumpin aff boat eccied Link to comment
Roberto Posted May 6 Share Posted May 6 21 minutes ago, Ohjimmyjimmy said: His brither Brut must be devastated. Wonder if it was cool waters he jumped into. Link to comment
Ohjimmyjimmy Posted May 6 Share Posted May 6 It wasn’t eccies he was sniftering the Old Spice. Link to comment
Arabian Knight Posted May 6 Share Posted May 6 thon rivers current cin b sauvag this time o year Link to comment
Ohjimmyjimmy Posted May 6 Share Posted May 6 He’d have been better off jumping in the Dior the Don this time of year. Link to comment
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