Pet Hates

[spamspamspam]

 

Got in this afternoon to discover the wife had printed a list of shit that needs done... not only did it have things I still have to get done, it also has the things I've recently done on the list... with a nice wee tick in the box next to it, just by way of encouragement. As if to say GOOOD BOY.. WHO'S A GOOD BOY? YOU ARE! YES, YES YOU ARE!

 

This list runs to two pages.

 

 

thats going to eat into your porntime.

[Jigot]

Got in this afternoon to discover the wife had printed a list of shit that needs done... not only did it have things I still have to get done, it also has the things I've recently done on the list... with a nice wee tick in the box next to it, just by way of encouragement. As if to say GOOOD BOY.. WHO'S A GOOD BOY? YOU ARE! YES, YES YOU ARE!

 

This list runs to two pages.

 

At least I now ken it's not just me, or am I just being the selfish arsehole?

[Ke1t]

At least I now ken it's not just me, or am I just being the selfish arsehole?

 

She reckons she's going easy on me, I think.

 

About 5 weeks ago I caught a cunt of a flu which turned into what I thought was bronchitis, but turns out to be walking pneumonia

 

My lungs feel like they're only operating at 2/3 capacity and I've been fucked up for about 3 weeks, coughing and wheezing and acting like a 65 year old... I feel like Burt fucking Reynolds looks most of the time.

 

So shit hasn't been getting done, and I KNOW she's been sitting on this list all that time, adding to it each day... and now I'm starting to feel a bit better she's launched her List O Shit You Better Get Done on me.

 

Pinned it to my corkboard and told her it'll get done as soon as is likely.

[Jigot]

Thon flu/cauld shit is rampant here, fuck me, I had it for weeks. Taking it easy is the only known cure. Tell the wife the Doctor reckons you"ll be up and running, about the 3rd week in September. Pint Whisky toddies, may or may not, speed up recovery but try them anyway, it'll prove to the wife you're like a springed coil, ready to work through the list, but no the noo.

[Ke1t]

Thon flu/cauld shit is rampant here, fuck me, I had it for weeks. Taking it easy is the only known cure. Tell the wife the Doctor reckons you"ll be up and running, about the 3rd week in September. Pint Whisky toddies, may or may not, speed up recovery but try them anyway, it'll prove to the wife you're like a springed coil, ready to work through the list, but no the noo.

 

 

"Aye... no the noo" That'll be my catchphrase for the next couple weeks if she wants anything done.

[Jigot]

 

"Aye... no the noo" That'll be my catchphrase for the next couple weeks if she wants anything done.

Aye, it's auld Scot's for "Ah would if Ah could but Ah cannae"

[Chewie37]

Very good tip.

I'll continue to cycle through the woods though.

Fairys muff......mud flaps required then!

 

Cunt in question would probably answer "So.., soap"

A slap every time he starts will train him not to do it, eventually

[Chewie37]

Thon flu/cauld shit is rampant here, fuck me, I had it for weeks. Taking it easy is the only known cure. Tell the wife the Doctor reckons you"ll be up and running, about the 3rd week in September. Pint Whisky toddies, may or may not, speed up recovery but try them anyway, it'll prove to the wife you're like a springed coil, ready to work through the list, but no the noo.

Yeah that bug was pish. Off the booze seems to mean germs stay in you longer, normally I'm only sick for a day or so, three/four weeks I had that snotty, lung shite

[alscotoz]

Thanks to my nuts/dried fruit/gluten free diet, I never get sick.

 

Drinking too much keeps me off the sickie list.

[Guest milne_afc]

People throwing slanderous and factually innacurate insults like murderer around willy nilly.

[fine-n-dandy]

 

Boy IS a murderer.

 

Boy takes knife to school

Boy takes knife out to scare other boy that he just called a fat bitch

Boy gets in fight with boy

Boy stabs boy during fight

 

Boy is murderer

 

Boy wasn't charged with murder because it was easier to ensure conviction with lesser charge but boy is murderer all the same

 

Sue me

[Robbie Winters]

Lassies who dye their hair pink or turquoise on the cheap

[StandFree1982]

Lassies who dye their hair pink or turquoise on the cheap

That's a bit more accurate.

[Dynamo]

Edinburgh accent.

[Henry]

Edinburgh accent.

 

 

[Poodler]

Pub sports - pool and darts.

[minijc]

Pub sports - pool and darts.

Shite at both are ye?

[Lencarl]

Football Managers who wear tracksuits at matches. They need to be suited and booted. The Italians have the right approach.

[BWG]

Pool is ace - its the arseholes that it arracts that I hate.

[reekie_dock]

Bandits are worse

 

Fucking horse takes up a houra space in the pub...

[Poodler]

Shite at both are ye?

Haven't played either in about 10 year. I go to pubs to drink and chase women, Nae play games

[StandFree1982]

Haven't played either in about 10 year. I go to pubs to drink and chase women, Nae play games

Chase women?! Sounds like something you'd do in primary school. Do you punch them in the arm and run away as well?

[tommo1903]

 

She reckons she's going easy on me, I think.

 

About 5 weeks ago I caught a cunt of a flu which turned into what I thought was bronchitis, but turns out to be walking pneumonia

 

My lungs feel like they're only operating at 2/3 capacity and I've been fucked up for about 3 weeks, coughing and wheezing and acting like a 65 year old... I feel like Burt fucking Reynolds looks most of the time.

 

So shit hasn't been getting done, and I KNOW she's been sitting on this list all that time, adding to it each day... and now I'm starting to feel a bit better she's launched her List O Shit You Better Get Done on me.

 

Pinned it to my corkboard and told her it'll get done as soon as is likely.

 

Just do it all really badly, then you'll not get asked to do it again

[Poodler]

Chase women?! Sounds like something you'd do in primary school. Do you punch them in the arm and run away as well?

Nah, I'm basically Ike Turner min.

[caledonia]

 

She reckons she's going easy on me, I think.

 

About 5 weeks ago I caught a cunt of a flu which turned into what I thought was bronchitis, but turns out to be walking pneumonia

 

My lungs feel like they're only operating at 2/3 capacity and I've been fucked up for about 3 weeks, coughing and wheezing and acting like a 65 year old... I feel like Burt fucking Reynolds looks most of the time.

 

So shit hasn't been getting done, and I KNOW she's been sitting on this list all that time, adding to it each day... and now I'm starting to feel a bit better she's launched her List O Shit You Better Get Done on me.

 

Pinned it to my corkboard and told her it'll get done as soon as is likely.

 

And jobs which take time even if tradesmen do them are expected to be done quick or you get (have you no done that yet what is taking you so long)

dissna help if the minute she goes out the door you sit on your arse and watch sport either

[Chewie37]

Unfunny weegie cunts taking the piss out of anyone else's accent

[alscotoz]

Nah, I'm basically Ike Turner min.

 

So you batter them and run away?

[Poodler]

When people say 'end of rant'

[fine-n-dandy]

Folk that say things like"that's one of ma pet hates that"

 

That's one of my pet hates

[Sheep#1]

All this 'welcome back Rangers' pish everywhere, how can they be welcomed 'back' to somewhere they've never been?