Restaurants In Aberdeen

[360]

I was at The Lairhillock recently.

 

Thought it was okay but overpriced.

 

 

 

360

[tup]

I was at The Lairhillock recently. Thought it was okay but overpriced. 360

That about sums up all restaurants.

 

Plus, most chefs are gay.

 

They are probably shagging the chicken before it goes in the oven.

[Bluto10]

 

Generally, the less there is of it the more 'poash' it's meant to be.

 

I've sat at a table and been presented with a plate 90% devoid of food, with maybe a cracker with a piece of salmon on it, a piece of parsley the size of a penny, and some unidentifiable orange sauce dripped over it in a zigzag pattern. 5 seconds later you've emptied your plate, and you're looking around at a bunch of people who are all pretending to be stuffed. "Oh it were delicious, garcon."

 

Aye? There wasnae enough on my plate to tell if it was good, bad or indifferent.

 

For the price of that you could probably get two dozen Mikes Chipper suppers, and a six pack of beer to wash them down.

 

No prizes for guessing which I'd rather have,

 

aye but trheyre completely differnt things, really.

 

take fine dining, i mean the worlds best nae youre local fancy restaurant, is more of an experience - a taste sensation.

 

its completely different to the home cooking comfort food that someone like cheesepipes would eat.

or the bland fraye bentos shite that tup cooks most nights.

 

for me a great meal can be had down the local gastropub just like it can at your 3* michelin joint.

if you appreciate what the worlds top chefs produce then the latter is far more memorable; but as i said you canna compare them food wise.

[alscotoz]

That about sums up all restaurants.

 

Plus, most chefs are gay.

 

They are probably shagging the chicken before it goes in the oven.

 

 

How do they know if the chicken's gay? If it's not, does that constitute rape? Even if it's gay and gets shagged by a gay chef, has it given its permission? Is rape the same as bestiality (birdiality?). You've opened a can of worms here. Could gay chefs shag worms? I really don't know.

[alscotoz]

Are there gay worms?

 

Has anyone ever opened a can which was full of worms?

 

Can you buy a can of worms/

 

Do male worms have a penis to be gay with?

 

 

You've opened a right can of worms there, Rumpus.

[360]

[buchanskii]

Cuban leader?

 

[tup]

Chefs are gay because they are catering for gays.

 

Only gay folk bang on about restaurants IMO.

 

You'd get a burst mooth for that type of chat in my local.

[dave_min]

Chefs are gay because they are catering for gays.

 

Only gay folk bang on about restaurants IMO.

 

You'd get a burst mooth for that type of chat in my local.

 

Does your local do food?

[360]

Anyone ever seen a Chinese person yawn?

Ever seen a goth driving a car?

[Bluto10]

 

Does your local do food?

 

he doesnt drink david - ergo he doesnt have a local.

 

lying bald piece of shit.

[tup]

My local does food aye.

 

Its nothing special, it's just to fill a fucking hole anyway.

 

How good can food get?

 

Who actually gives a fuck?

[The Boofon]

My local does food aye.

Its nothing special, it's just to fill a fucking hole anyway.

How good can food get?

Who actually gives a fuck?

You almost resigned from the pool league because a pub used Tesco Value bread and cheese for the sandwiches FFS.

[360]

I like pub grub.

 

Few cold ones does enhance my desire to eat, admittedly.

[tup]

You almost resigned from the pool league because a pub used Tesco Value bread and cheese for the sandwiches FFS.

That's too far the other way.

 

I just eat normal stuff.

 

When the pretence starts, I'm off, give me a couple of bacon rolls any day over all that shite.

 

One of my pals once said 'i dinna eat foreign food'.

 

As he was tucking into a Pot Noodle

[Clydeside_Sheep]

Here's my helpful review of the restaurants and public bars of Scotland, arranged by City:

 

Aberdeen - shite

Edinburgh - conspicuously shite (an apology of a capital city)

Dundee - shite

Stirling - shite

Perth - not even a real City, but shite anyway

Glasgow - good quality, excellent range

 

[The Boofon]

Here's my helpful review of the restaurants and public bars of Scotland, arranged by City:

 

Aberdeen - shite

Edinburgh - conspicuously shite (an apology of a capital city)

Dundee - shite

Stirling - shite

Perth - not even a real City, but shite anyway

Glasgow - good quality, excellent range

 

You've missed out Inverness.

[Ke1t]

 

 

aye but trheyre completely differnt things, really.

 

take fine dining, i mean the worlds best nae youre local fancy restaurant, is more of an experience - a taste sensation.

 

its completely different to the home cooking comfort food that someone like cheesepipes would eat.

or the bland fraye bentos shite that tup cooks most nights.

 

for me a great meal can be had down the local gastropub just like it can at your 3* michelin joint.

if you appreciate what the worlds top chefs produce then the latter is far more memorable; but as i said you canna compare them food wise.

 

 

 

 

 

I've experienced what you'd probably call 'fine dining', and not simply expensive restaurant, but actual 'banquet' style nosh for diplomats, leaders of Industry, and government ministers and the like. I'm assuming outside of the Queen's birthday party or a Bill Gates Orgy, there's probably not many dining experiences that are more high falutin' than the kind of thing I've experienced. I've also observed the harrowing poverty of the Russian peasant as we trolled along in some auild lads giant yacht/cruise liner... I was a little drunk though, and as I've pointed out previously, I could definitely, definitely, 100% shagged the Russian Minister of Technology's wife, but again, the food was, I would have to say, top notch... even if I couldn't appreciate it because I get violently sick any time I set foot on a boat.

 

Same thing here... we spent two weeks in DC with government and military sorts, clinking glasses with angry looking lads in Air Force uniforms and government officials who were clearly only there for the jollies.

 

I should point out that this is all because of the wife's job, fuck all to do with me. Her job has seen her creating and selling Tech solutions to various governments and militaries around the world, including here in the US, so they tend to put on a show for the visiting Yankees. Given the profile of her job she regularly flies (not so much these days) to DC and various other countries to meet with government sorts. Her team designed a whole bunch of solutions for dealing with terrorist attacks against airports, military bases, including attacks from snipers and chemical attacks. As a result Kelt has mingled with the sort of people he has no right to be mingling with.

 

I'll be honest, though, I'm not the high falutin' sort... I'm not into swans stuffed with noodle doodles. Give me a packet of Monster Munch and a stripper with low self-esteem and I'm happy.

 

On one occassion she called me from a trip I was going to join her on at a later date. As she's talking there's screaming in the background...

 

"Is somebody murdering the wee bairns?!?" I asked, anxiously.

 

"No," she says, "I'm in a restaurant with peacocks inside cages. Later we're off to the ballet. What are you doing?"

 

"Eating hotpockets and wanking off to HBO porn." I says.

 

Different worlds, min.

 

Different worlds.

[Henry]

 

 

even if I couldn't appreciate it because I get violently sick any time I set foot on a boat.

 

 

 

[Henry]

Here's my helpful review of the restaurants and public bars of Scotland, arranged by City:

 

Aberdeen - shite

Edinburgh - conspicuously shite (an apology of a capital city)

Dundee - shite

Stirling - shite

Perth - not even a real City, but shite anyway

Glasgow - good quality, excellent range

 

 

A weegie? Belittling things outside of Glasgow?

 

Never.

[Ke1t]

 

 

Can't help it... I've no 'sea legs' at all. Tried the Deep Sea Fishing in Florida... spend about 5 hours spewing into an oil drum. Tried fishing off a pontoon near the shore... spewed like a fanny. Crossing the channel in a ferry, hooring my guts up.

 

Party on a boat... same result.

 

This is all while loaded on dramamine inna.

 

Kelt disnae dae boats.

 

[reekie_dock]

Was on Holiday in Turkey we ma ex and she wanted to go on a boat trip. We went down to the beach and jumped aboard one oh the death traps that they pass as vessels. We we're on the boat for ages before it sailed and she was taking a fair beating in the surf. By the time we set sail ma ex was green. I nipped to bog for a shit which turned out to be a demon after many local beer and kebabs the night before. Ma ex spent the 3hr boat trip in the bog after me spewing and smelling my colossal jobbie while i was larging it up on the boat checking oot all the hairys and beering it up.........

[Sheep#1]

That's too far the other way.

I just eat normal stuff.

When the pretence starts, I'm off, give me a couple of bacon rolls any day over all that shite.

One of my pals once said 'i dinna eat foreign food'.

As he was tucking into a Pot Noodle

What far flung exotic land do pot noodles come from like?

[Ke1t]

What far flung exotic land do pot noodles come from like?

 

Wiki:

 

Pot Noodles are manufactured in Croespenmaen, near Crumlin, Caerphilly, Wales,^[4] which became the topic of a 2006 advertising campaign, showing fictitious Pot Noodle mines in Wales. The factory typically produces 155 million pots annually.

[Sheep#1]

 

Wiki:

 

Pot Noodles are manufactured in [/size]Croespenmaen, near [/size]Crumlin, Caerphilly, [/size]Wales,[/size]^[4] which became the topic of a 2006 advertising campaign, showing fictitious Pot Noodle mines in Wales. The factory typically produces 155 million pots annually.[/size]

Can Welsh produced food be classed as 'foreign muck'?

[Ke1t]

Can Welsh produced food be classed as 'foreign muck'?

 

Only after Independence

[Clydeside_Sheep]

You've missed out Inverness.

See: "Perth"

[Clydeside_Sheep]

And New Byth.

See: "Perth"

[Clydeside_Sheep]

And Elgin

See: "Perth"

 

Though - Kudos to the bold Elgin, it is a place I retain affection for.

[Clydeside_Sheep]

And Brechin, it's a city too.

See: "Perth"