The Boofon Posted June 10, 2012 Author Share Posted June 10, 2012 Having just won the euro millions and purchasing an isolated island. I now need some dinosaur dna. Where can I get some. Bonzo Stephen's Corner Shop on Hutcheon Street in Aberdeen. They sell everything else. Poppers, Dildos and Dinosaur bones. Link to comment
Chrisyboy81 Posted June 12, 2012 Share Posted June 12, 2012 Get yourself some Rapist Glasses and a Paedophile beard. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EVcyNANK5cY http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oOCAvxLByi8&feature=relatedHa ha Jon la Joie class! Link to comment
StandFree1982 Posted June 12, 2012 Share Posted June 12, 2012 Tup's Corner was my fucking idea in the first place! I demand compensation.... Link to comment
The Boofon Posted June 12, 2012 Author Share Posted June 12, 2012 Tup's Corner was my fucking idea in the first place! I demand compensation.... No problem. What would you like? Link to comment
StandFree1982 Posted June 12, 2012 Share Posted June 12, 2012 No problem. What would you like?How about some advice? Dear Boofs, I am currently looking down the barrel of a second interview for a job I applied for a few weeks ago. What should be my approach? SF1982 Link to comment
The Boofon Posted June 12, 2012 Author Share Posted June 12, 2012 How about some advice? Dear Boofs, I am currently looking down the barrel of a second interview for a job I applied for a few weeks ago. What should be my approach? SF1982 Turn up well dressed, on time and if you're a smoker don't smoke before hand. Link to comment
StandFree1982 Posted June 12, 2012 Share Posted June 12, 2012 Turn up well dressed, on time and if you're a smoker don't smoke before hand.What about drinking coffee? Link to comment
The Boofon Posted June 12, 2012 Author Share Posted June 12, 2012 What about drinking coffee? I doubt you'll get offered one but accept it if offered. Link to comment
BrianFaePerth Posted June 12, 2012 Share Posted June 12, 2012 Dear Poofon,Someone eh ken is an awful name-dropper. He can barely complete a sentence without Elton or Buzz, or his old mukka Gadaffi being thrown in for good measure. Anyways, my question is, what is the cost of a loaf of bread? Yours,Byen Link to comment
The Boofon Posted June 12, 2012 Author Share Posted June 12, 2012 Dear Poofon,Someone eh ken is an awful name-dropper. He can barely complete a sentence without Elton or Buzz, or his old mukka Gadaffi being thrown in for good measure. Anyways, my question is, what is the cost of a loaf of bread? Yours,Byen Link to comment
BrianFaePerth Posted June 12, 2012 Share Posted June 12, 2012 Dear Poofon,Can it be seen as a coincidence that the capture of this gay guy directly coincides with Tup's disappearance from this board? Cheers,Byen Link to comment
Karl Fletcher Posted June 12, 2012 Share Posted June 12, 2012 Boof, Is Tup deid? Karl Link to comment
BrianFaePerth Posted June 12, 2012 Share Posted June 12, 2012 Boof, Is Tup deid? Karl Get yer own fuckin question Link to comment
Coopy100 Posted June 12, 2012 Share Posted June 12, 2012 Boof. Due to the news today of Rangers (deceased 1872-2012) I need some advice. What is the best way of removing cumstains from my underwear due to spontaneous ejaculation? Also this keeps happening every time I see anything else on the demise of the huns. Howe can I stop this? Yours in hope. Coops Link to comment
The Boofon Posted June 12, 2012 Author Share Posted June 12, 2012 Dear Poofon,Can it be seen as a coincidence that the capture of this gay guy directly coincides with Tup's disappearance from this board? Cheers,Byen No. Boof, Is Tup deid? Karl No. Boof. Due to the news today of Rangers (deceased 1872-2012) I need some advice. What is the best way of removing cumstains from my underwear due to spontaneous ejaculation? Also this keeps happening every time I see anything else on the demise of the huns. Howe can I stop this? Yours in hope. Coops Gouge out your eyes. Link to comment
Coopy100 Posted June 12, 2012 Share Posted June 12, 2012 Gouge out your eyes.Thanks for the excellent advice boof. This however only answers part two. Part one remains unanswered. Tup was better at this than you. I will however give you a second chance. I have gouged my eyes out as suggested but now I cum anytime I hear anything about the huns demise.This was typed by my assistant upon my dictation. Also please answer part one of my first post. Buck the fuck up. Coops. Link to comment
The Boofon Posted June 12, 2012 Author Share Posted June 12, 2012 Thanks for the excellent advice boof. This however only answers part two. Part one remains unanswered. Tup was better at this than you. I will however give you a second chance. I have gouged my eyes out as suggested but now I cum anytime I hear anything about the huns demise.This was typed by my assistant upon my dictation. Also please answer part one of my first post. Buck the fuck up. Coops. Gouging your eyes out gets blood on the stains which removes the spunky mess. Don't doubt my advice. I gave one answer to two problems saving you a considerable amount of time and money. With regards to hearing about the huns please take your gouged eyes and stick them in your ears. Link to comment
Jigot Posted June 12, 2012 Share Posted June 12, 2012 Dear Boofon, The hun next door has topped himself over the happy tidings of earlier today.He is swaying gently in the breeze,from a rope.(blue nylon sort, so no class in the here after either)My quandary may seem trivial to some,but it is affecting me to distraction,hence my heartfelt plea to yourself. What wheelie bin should the fucker go in?The general domestic waste or one of the many for recycle? Your's A considerate neighbour. Link to comment
muttondressedaslamb Posted June 12, 2012 Share Posted June 12, 2012 The incinerator would be a better option. Or feed to him the pigs ala Nat Fraser Link to comment
The Boofon Posted June 12, 2012 Author Share Posted June 12, 2012 Dear Boofon, The hun next door has topped himself over the happy tidings of earlier today.He is swaying gently in the breeze,from a rope.(blue nylon sort, so no class in the here after either)My quandary may seem trivial to some,but it is affecting me to distraction,hence my heartfelt plea to yourself. What wheelie bin should the fucker go in?The general domestic waste or one of the many for recycle? Your's A considerate neighbour. I think landfill would be better as if he's a hun he's clearly a fat cunt and never going to fit in a wheelie bin. Tie the rope round the tow bridle of your car and drag the fucker to landfill. The incinerator would be a better option. Or feed to him the pigs ala Nat Fraser Watch it you. Link to comment
Jigot Posted June 12, 2012 Share Posted June 12, 2012 I think landfill would be better as if he's a hun he's clearly a fat cunt and never going to fit in a wheelie bin. Tie the rope round the tow bridle of your car and drag the fucker to landfill. Watch it you. Did as you kindly advised, but was only successful in ripping the entire arse from my 1975 Triumph Toledo.If I were to feed him to the pigs,as your usurper recommended,that would be cannibalism,no?Anyway,I hung him back up and will leave him there till Guy Fawks or Halloween.He'll make a braw wind chime in 2-3 months anaw. Link to comment
muttondressedaslamb Posted June 12, 2012 Share Posted June 12, 2012 Did as you kindly advised, but was only successful in ripping the entire arse from my 1975 Triumph Toledo.If I were to feed him to the pigs,as your usurper recommended,that would be cannibalism,no?Anyway,I hung him back up and will leave him there till Guy Fawks or Halloween.He'll make a braw wind chime in 2-3 months anaw. brilliant Link to comment
Jigot Posted June 14, 2012 Share Posted June 14, 2012 Dear Boofon, After a spot of rumpy-pumpy,I give me tallywhacker a dicht on the bedroom curtain (velvet) but recently I have developed an alarmingly,gut churning looking rash. Is a visit to the dry cleaners or the clinic on the cards in your esteemed opinion? If the latter,I would happily try any tried and trusted home remedies before I do the walk of shame. I know I'm only scratching at the surface here but I have to go to work. yours, An itchingly inconsiderate lover. Link to comment
The Boofon Posted June 14, 2012 Author Share Posted June 14, 2012 Dear Boofon, After a spot of rumpy-pumpy,I give me tallywhacker a dicht on the bedroom curtain (velvet) but recently I have developed an alarmingly,gut churning looking rash. Is a visit to the dry cleaners or the clinic on the cards in your esteemed opinion? If the latter,I would happily try any tried and trusted home remedies before I do the walk of shame. I know I'm only scratching at the surface here but I have to go to work. yours, An itchingly inconsiderate lover. Don't limit your options Jigot. Think outside the box. It's an allergic reaction to velvet. I suggest a visit to Lynne Frost who is neither a dry cleaner or a doctor. Lynne Frost I mean velvet curtains in this day and age. Link to comment
Dandyesque Posted June 14, 2012 Share Posted June 14, 2012 Don't limit your options Jigot. Think outside the box. It's an allergic reaction to velvet. I suggest a visit to Lynne Frost who is neither a dry cleaner or a doctor. Lynne Frost I mean velvet curtains in this day and age. Unbelievable. I bet he has a ceiling fan as well. Link to comment
Jigot Posted June 14, 2012 Share Posted June 14, 2012 Unbelievable. I bet he has a ceiling fan as well.A punkawalla, actually,3 rupees a calendar month.I like to decorate my bedroom in different themes,just to spice things up a little,if you know what I mean?Currently it is in Funeral Parlour mode,hence the velvet,a really deep red.The subtle aroma of formaldehyde just takes me to the point of no return. Link to comment
Big Man Posted June 14, 2012 Share Posted June 14, 2012 Don't limit your options Jigot. Think outside the box. It's an allergic reaction to velvet. I suggest a visit to Lynne Frost who is neither a dry cleaner or a doctor. Lynne Frost I mean velvet curtains in this day and age. Dear Boofon, Do you know Lynne Frost personally? Regards, BM Link to comment
The Boofon Posted June 14, 2012 Author Share Posted June 14, 2012 Dear Boofon, Do you know Lynne Frost personally? Regards, BM No. Link to comment
The Boofon Posted June 15, 2012 Author Share Posted June 15, 2012 why not? I don't need an interior designer. If I did I'd use Lynne. Link to comment
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