Annoying Things About Working In An Office

[ChutneyLove]

Hope to fuck for your ain sake it wisnae you that was stealing my yoghurts fae one o the fridges fae my work a few weeks back...

 

Nope, yoghurts aren't my thing.

Sausage rolls or any other pastry delight - tick.

Pizza - tick.

Neatly cut sandwiches - tick.

Anything wrapped in tin foil, anything wet or anything that may be vegetarian - nit, gads - I'd rather eat my own stuff.

[The Boofon]

Thank you for your email but I am either currently: In a cupboardRunning like fuck across the desertBeing interrogated by the fedsIn Las Vegas In case your matter is urgent please contact Sky or any other media outlet and they will contact me.

 

Brian fae Bergen wants a read request sent.

 

Do you want to send an unread and deleted request instead?

 

YES PLEASE.

[dervish]

Nope, yoghurts aren't my thing.

Sausage rolls or any other pastry delight - tick.

Pizza - tick.

Neatly cut sandwiches - tick.

Anything wrapped in tin foil, anything wet or anything that may be vegetarian - nit, gads - I'd rather eat my own stuff.

 

? Ya clatty bastard.

[muttonhumper]

Nope, yoghurts aren't my thing.

[granite sheep]

Serial farters. Noisy ones I can handle, they almost always apologise. The fuckers that unleash the dreaded Silent But Deadly: and carry on as if nothing's happened- utter scum.

[King Street Loon]

Serial farters. Noisy ones I can handle, they almost always apologise. The fuckers that unleash the dreaded Silent But Deadly: and carry on as if nothing's happened- utter scum.

You wouldn't have been impressed with me lastnight then.

 

Had a curry in that Shiri Bheemer in Belmont Street lastnight and stunk out Slains Castle a couple of times.

There was someone to take the fall though and he got the blame.

[granite sheep]

Ken a boy that works for one o the sewage plants, he's got it made as apparently the entire complex reeks of shite: can fart awa to yer hearts content and naebody will ever ken...

[BrianFaePerth]

Another place that is brilliant for farting is a plane. The engine noise covers the sound and no one can pinpoint the culprit

[dervish]

Another place that is brilliant for farting is a plane. The engine noise covers the sound and no one can pinpoint the culprit

 

Follow through on take off and you're in a world of hurt though.

[Henry]

 

ALMOST two thirds of Aberdeen professionals work outside ‘regular’ office hours, according to research.

The study collected the opinions of more than 3,000 business workers in the UK and shows a rise in the numbers, compared to five years ago.

It found that 60% of professionals in Aberdeen believed that fixed hours “no longer suited their duties”.

66% of those questioned in the survey, by flexible workspace firm Regus, also reported a rise in the number of staff who work remotely.

Richard Morris, Regus’ UK CEO, said: “These findings clearly show that UK working practices continue to evolve.

“The fact that so many workers in Aberdeen are finding that ‘regular’ hours no longer suit their roles should prompt companies to embrace flexible working practices.”

[boboisared]

 

 

ALMOST two thirds of Aberdeen professionals work outside ‘regular’ office hours, according to research.

The study collected the opinions of more than 3,000 business workers in the UK and shows a rise in the numbers, compared to five years ago.

It found that 60% of professionals in Aberdeen believed that fixed hours “no longer suited their duties”.

66% of those questioned in the survey, by flexible workspace firm Regus, also reported a rise in the number of staff who work remotely.

Richard Morris, Regus’ UK CEO, said: “These findings clearly show that UK working practices continue to evolve.

“The fact that so many workers in Aberdeen are finding that ‘regular’ hours no longer suit their roles should prompt companies to embrace flexible working practices.”

 

So two thirds of 300 folk, rather than two thirds of the whole city?

 

Pish survey.

[looksgoodinred]

So two thirds of 300 folk, rather than two thirds of the whole city?

 

Pish survey.

 

two-thirds of 3,000.

and 3,000 as a sample size is probably statistically reliable.

 

 

EDIT: more than sufficient according to this handy-dandy calculation.

https://www.surveymonkey.com/mp/sample-size/

[StandFree1982]

 

two-thirds of 3,000.

and 3,000 as a sample size is probably statistically reliable.

How are they defining "professional"?

 

If they took 3000 randomly from different types of companies, different backgrounds and different roles, this will very likely give you a different result than 3000 PM's from Oil and Gas companies, for example.

[looksgoodinred]

How are they defining "professional"?

 

If they took 3000 randomly from different types of companies, different backgrounds and different roles, this will very likely give you a different result than 3000 PM's from Oil and Gas companies, for example.

fair enough. though your first concern was with the sample size. and as size goes (3,000 out of what? a total of 300,000 population? and something less that works), it's statistically reliable.

[boboisared]

fair enough. though your first concern was with the sample size. and as size goes (3,000 out of what? a total of 300,000 population? and something less that works), it's statistically reliable.

Nah I never believe those types of polls. No-one in either my company or where I work as a vendor works from home.

 

EDIT: There obviously could be some who do, but certainly not two thirds.

[daytripping]

I'm on flexi time but I'm more flexible than the boss would like, I have a problem getting my arse out of bed in the morning, would rather work later and have a lie in, traffic is a mare in rush hour as well, makes sense to space out starting and finishing times.

[boboisared]

I'm on flexi time but I'm more flexible than the boss would like, I have a problem getting my arse out of bed in the morning, would rather work later and have a lie in, traffic is a mare in rush hour as well, makes sense to space out starting and finishing times.

Yeah, most I know are on flexi time. I'm talking about working remotely though.

[looksgoodinred]

Yeah, most I know are on flexi time. I'm talking about working remotely though.

 

but the survey is referencing those with flexible hours as well as a rise in those that reported working remotely. so maybe two-thirds isn't so far off if most you know are on flex time?

 

It found that 60% of professionals in Aberdeen believed that fixed hours “no longer suited their duties”.

66% of those questioned in the survey, by flexible workspace firm Regus, also reported a rise in the number of staff who work remotely

 

anyway, neither here nor there to me really. but you'd think there'd be less traffic congestion if some many are working flexible hours?

[spamspamspam]

I get to work from home quite a lot

 

Luckily they dont expect 60+ hours a week but I've worked in a couple of offices like that before.

[daytripping]

I'd struggle for motivation working from home, would be too easily distracted by Jeremy Kyle and the antique shows.

[ChutneyLove]

I'd struggle for motivation working from home, would be too easily distracted by Jeremy Kyle and the antique shows.

 

At least it's nae the cooking shows.

[reekie_dock]

Having never worked in an office before i can honestly say id probably last half a day before i was charged for sexual harassment or taking a dump in someones bin for stealn my pencil sharpener or changing peoples screen savers to a picture of my balloon knot.

 

Also I couldnt take shit from a woman in the work place. I'm not sexist at all but recently witnessed at a meeting about redundancies on my rig the office junior be heckled by the three HR women in the meeting to hurry up and get buscuits for us. They made the peer lad look like a right cunt. We had been having a conversation before rest of cunts had came in about Football and turned out he was a Dundee Fan, this was couple days after the 3-3 last month.

 

I never ate fack all buscuits thats for sure he came back after 15 mins with opend pack oh chocolate digestives. We shared a look as he came in, which screamed Iv wiped ma spunky cock all over these bastards don't eat them.

[ChutneyLove]

I never ate fack all buscuits thats for sure he came back after 15 mins with opend pack oh chocolate digestives. We shared a look as he came in, which screamed Iv wiped ma spunky cock all over these bastards don't eat them.

 

[The Boofon]

Having never worked in an office before i can honestly say id probably last half a day before i was charged for sexual harassment or taking a dump in someones bin for stealn my pencil sharpener or changing peoples screen savers to a picture of my balloon knot.

Also I couldnt take shit from a woman in the work place. I'm not sexist at all but recently witnessed at a meeting about redundancies on my rig the office junior be heckled by the three HR women in the meeting to hurry up and get buscuits for us. They made the peer lad look like a right cunt. We had been having a conversation before rest of cunts had came in about Football and turned out he was a Dundee Fan, this was couple days after the 3-3 last month.

I never ate fack all buscuits thats for sure he came back after 15 mins with opend pack oh chocolate digestives. We shared a look as he came in, which screamed Iv wiped ma spunky cock all over these bastards don't eat them.

A highly unlikely scenario. You're nothing like that in real life so I doubt you'd have such a massive personality change just be working in an office.

[daytripping]

 

At least it's nae the cooking shows.

 

I'm a big fan of the cooking and food shows, man v food is a great afternoon filler.

[rumpus]

I'd like to add Judge Rinder to the above list. High quality viewing to be enjoyed by one and all.

 

Particularly enthralling was a case the girl from Dundee brought to the bench wanting compensation for tattoo removal from her (ex) boyfriend. He'd purchased his own tattoo kit and after an all day drinking session she let him try out his new toy on her previously untainted buttocks.

 

Wisnae cheap either.

[Bluto10]

I've spent the last 6 months watching daytime TV.

I've really changed my opinion on a lot of it.

For example I used to hate the Hairy Bikers but now I actively seek out their work. On the flip side I used to like Rick Stein now I hope he falls into his own boiling brothpot the arsehole that he is.

You gotta eat here

Luke Nguyens Vietnam

Air Crash Investigation

Happy Days

Supermarket Sweep

All great additions to your day.

Was at Ricks book signing in Padstein.

I got him to draw a fish instead of signing his book.

He found it amusing.

The end.

[tommo1903]

Having never worked in an office before i can honestly say id probably last half a day before i was charged for sexual harassment or taking a dump in someones bin for stealn my pencil sharpener or changing peoples screen savers to a picture of my balloon knot.

Also I couldnt take shit from a woman in the work place. I'm not sexist at all but recently witnessed at a meeting about redundancies on my rig the office junior be heckled by the three HR women in the meeting to hurry up and get buscuits for us. They made the peer lad look like a right cunt. We had been having a conversation before rest of cunts had came in about Football and turned out he was a Dundee Fan, this was couple days after the 3-3 last month.

I never ate fack all buscuits thats for sure he came back after 15 mins with opend pack oh chocolate digestives. We shared a look as he came in, which screamed Iv wiped ma spunky cock all over these bastards don't eat them.

Hmm. Far do you work Reekie min?

[looksgoodinred]

gossips.

[tutankamun]

Nah I never believe those types of polls. No-one in either my company or where I work as a vendor works from home.

 

EDIT: There obviously could be some who do, but certainly not two thirds.

 

I work from home a lot (approx. 50% of my time) as do most of my colleagues. I find if you work from home you tend to actually put in more hours than when in the office... and you certainly get a lot more work done.