If you could only eat one nation's cuisine for the rest of your life...

[The Buzzard]

4 minutes ago, Fridge said:

Well get your takeaway stories out you moaning fucks. Probably both been kicked in for being dicks.

How about this one then Fridge. I once bought a pizza from the takeaway. I was pissed and stumbled into a lamppost and knocked the pizza  to the ground, where it landed on the dirty pavement. 
I then proceeded to go get myself a Chinese. As I returned from there and passed the fallen pizza I decided I wouldn't see it go to waste. 
I picked up the pizza, picked off the pieces of grit etc. that had stuck to it. I then took it home and ate it. 

[Fridge]

I actually do have a half decent takeaway story was in Shezans on Holburn Street and bumped into Dean Windass. He was half cut, bought a kebab and I said you better score  tomorrow as we were away to Dundee Utd. He duly did.

Would love to say it was the winner but if I recall it was 1-1.

[Bluto10]

37 minutes ago, Fridge said:

Why this story has came into my mind I have no idea but a mate of mine once bought a Chinese , he was obviously totally pished woke up the next day and and had no recollection. Was located on his front doorstep.

done similar myself, but also slumped down and slept there

[Parklife]

22 minutes ago, Fridge said:

Well get your takeaway stories out you moaning fucks. Probably both been kicked in for being dicks.

Here's a classic 

https://metro.co.uk/video/woman-bared-breasts-accused-kebab-staff-rape-violent-rampage-2260050/?ito=vjs-link

 

[Don Fonte]

 

[manboobs109]

1 hour ago, JumboJET said:

 

 

 

 

 

Thank you all for your suggestions.

Why would you choose these cuisines?

Kebabs

[manboobs109]

20 minutes ago, Bluto10 said:

done similar myself, but also slumped down and slept there

And soiled your scants

[Beachend Bootboy]

6 minutes ago, Don Fonte said:

 

Awe, cards.

[Fridge]

6 minutes ago, Bad_Mobby said:

Fixed 

Probably my fault but comedy all the same

https://www.planetfootball.com/nostalgia/remembering-the-time-dean-windass-got-three-red-cards-in-one-game/

[Fridge]

29 minutes ago, Fridge said:

Probably my fault but comedy all the same

https://www.planetfootball.com/nostalgia/remembering-the-time-dean-windass-got-three-red-cards-in-one-game/

I actually might be a worse Jonah than @Dad I also managed to wipe out half the Aberdeen team in Soul bar with Covid.

Joking of course but I was there and with then,  I never got it. Next day they were all tested positive.

 

[Simply Red]

Went into Maccys union st hammered one sat night for another big mac and they gave me the wrong order. Massive bag of stuff, easy £80-£100 worth, i just grabbed it and scurried out sharpish. Could hear the lassie shouting “sir sir” at me down the street but i was offski. Found a quiet spot away from any police helicopters up Mcombies Court (where fopp used to be) and got tore in. 
Guts were well fucked for 24hrs after. Was so delighted with my prize that i had to wake the missus up when i got in to tell her about it and see if she wanted a burger. She told me to fuck off iirc.

Career highlight.

[Don Fonte]

7 minutes ago, Simply Red said:

Went into Maccys union st hammered one sat night for another big mac and they gave me the wrong order. Massive bag of stuff, easy £80-£100 worth, i just grabbed it and scurried out sharpish. Could hear the lassie shouting “sir sir” at me down the street but i was offski. Found a quiet spot away from any police helicopters up Mcombies Court (where fopp used to be) and got tore in. 
Guts were well fucked for 24hrs after. Was so delighted with my prize that i had to wake the missus up when i got in to tell her about it and see if she wanted a burger. She told me to fuck off iirc.

Career highlight.

You got a bag with maybe 10 full meals in it minimum. I totally believe you.

[Hoofball]

Works night out and workmate got a chicken tikka pizza from La Lombarda, scoffed it on the bus home and came up to me on Monday asking if I knew why his fingers were all orange. I told him he was fingering some fat lassie that was covered in fake tan, he was mortified until I burst out laughing and told him he’d scoffed a chicken tikka pizza on the bus home. 

[Don Fonte]

1 hour ago, Fridge said:

I actually might be a worse Jonah than @Dad I also managed to wipe out half the Aberdeen team in Soul bar with Covid.

Joking of course but I was there and with then,  I never got it. Next day they were all tested positive.

 

You were out on the piss with the Aberdeen squad and gave them covid during lockdown aye.

Lay off the marching powder Fridgeo son and step back from the keyboard.

[Fridge]

10 minutes ago, Don Fonte said:

You were out on the piss with the Aberdeen squad and gave them covid during lockdown aye.

Lay off the marching powder Fridgeo son and step back from the keyboard.

I’m afraid that is a true story and it wasn’t during Covid it was literary the night before it. The day after Aberdeen got lot locked down and they couldn’t play

[Fridge]

Don’t care if you believe me or not but it is true

[Fridge]

I can’t prove it as I I don’t have photos but I was in Soul bar with them all and the next day Aberdeen was in shut down 

[redstrummer]

 

[Parklife]

27 minutes ago, Fridge said:

I’m afraid that is a true story and it wasn’t during Covid it was literary the night before it. The day after Aberdeen got lot locked down and they couldn’t play

 

25 minutes ago, Fridge said:

Don’t care if you believe me or not but it is true

 

20 minutes ago, Fridge said:

I can’t prove it as I I don’t have photos but I was in Soul bar with them all and the next day Aberdeen was in shut down 

You definitely don't care if he believes you. 

[Dad]

2 hours ago, Fridge said:

I actually might be a worse Jonah than @Dad I also managed to wipe out half the Aberdeen team in Soul bar with Covid.

Joking of course but I was there and with then,  I never got it. Next day they were all tested positive.

 

Certainly a bigger arsehole 

[Fridge]

2 minutes ago, Dad said:

Certainly a bigger arsehole 

To be fair I do feel a bit guilty about it but I didn’t have it.

[maryhilldon]

Got a kebab last week, said i wanted salad and sauce. You can imagine my disappointment when i got home only to discover they hadn't given me any salad.

[Beachend Bootboy]

4 minutes ago, maryhilldon said:

Got a kebab last week, said i wanted salad and sauce. You can imagine my disappointment when i got home only to discover they hadn't given me any salad.

You need to choose a better quality of wheeliebin to scran in.

[King Street Loon]

2 hours ago, maryhilldon said:

Got a kebab last week, said i wanted salad and sauce. You can imagine my disappointment when i got home only to discover they hadn't given me any salad.

Sounds chaotic 

[Studebaker-90]

Thai 

[Studebaker-90]

2 minutes ago, Sooper-hanz said:

Thai a rerrow libbon lound the old roak tlee

soy fo ma wife 

[Fridge]

2 hours ago, maryhilldon said:

Got a kebab last week, said i wanted salad and sauce. You can imagine my disappointment when i got home only to discover they hadn't given me any salad.

My mate lost it completely with that , paid for his food and discovered they’d fucked it up. Just launched it.

I said what are you going to do now  and he just said I don’t care 

Surely you would eat it and then complain later but anyway lost it

[Studebaker-90]

3 minutes ago, Fridge said:

My mate lost it completely with that , paid for his food and discovered they’d fucked it up. Just launched it.

I said what are you going to do now  and he just said I don’t care 

Surely you would eat it and then complain later but anyway lost it

Hutch? You kebab making bastards! 

[Crashnyploshnit]

Argentina. Their steaks are just the best.

[Fridge]

11 minutes ago, Studebaker-90 said:

Hutch? You kebab making bastards! 

He’s nae my mate. But if it had happened to him might have been a different outcome. 
 

Air shots getting thrown with kebab and salad down the  leather jacket 

Nae seen the menace in ages, he’s maybe in jail