Chat With Random Folks

[Quagmire]

Seems self harming chicks from Logie don't even know what JMG is :L:L:L

 

 

You: Hi, how are you? What do you do?

What do you listen to? Where do you go?

Are you with them or are you with us?

How do you dress? Who are your friends?

 

Won't you shut the f**k up?

I'm just trying to watch the band.

Stranger:

Somewhere beyond happiness and sadness

I need to calculate

What creates my own madness

And I'm addicted to your punishment

And you're the master

And I am waiting for disaster

 

[Chorus]

I feel irrational

So confrontational

To tell the truth I am

Getting away with murder

It isn't possible

To never tell the truth

But the reality is I'm getting away with murder

(Getting away, Getting away, Getting away)

 

I drink my drink and I don't even want to

I think my thoughts when I don't even need to

I never look back cause I don't even want to

And I don't need to

Because I'm getting away with murder

 

[Chorus]

 

Getting away, Getting away, Getting away,

Getting away, Getting away, Getting away,

Getting away, Getting away, Getting away,

With murder

 

Somewhere beyond happiness and sadness

I need to calculate

What creates my own madness

And I'm addicted to your punishment

And you're the master

And I am craving this disaster

Stranger:

Somewhere beyond happiness and sadness

I need to calculate

What creates my own madness

And I'm addicted to your punishment

And you're the master

And I am waiting for disaster

 

[Chorus]

I feel irrational

So confrontational

To tell the truth I am

Getting away with murder

It isn't possible

To never tell the truth

But the reality is I'm getting away with murder

(Getting away, Getting away, Getting away)

 

I drink my drink and I don't even want to

I think my thoughts when I don't even need to

I never look back cause I don't even want to

And I don't need to

Because I'm getting away with murder

 

[Chorus]

 

Getting away, Getting away, Getting away,

Getting away, Getting away, Getting away,

Getting away, Getting away, Getting away,

With murder

 

Somewhere beyond happiness and sadness

I need to calculate

What creates my own madness

And I'm addicted to your punishment

And you're the master

And I am craving this disaster

Stranger:

Somewhere beyond happiness and sadness

I need to calculate

What creates my own madness

And I'm addicted to your punishment

And you're the master

And I am waiting for disaster

 

[Chorus]

I feel irrational

So confrontational

To tell the truth I am

Getting away with murder

It isn't possible

To never tell the truth

But the reality is I'm getting away with murder

(Getting away, Getting away, Getting away)

 

I drink my drink and I don't even want to

I think my thoughts when I don't even need to

I never look back cause I don't even want to

And I don't need to

Because I'm getting away with murder

 

[Chorus]

 

Getting away, Getting away, Getting away,

Getting away, Getting away, Getting away,

Getting away, Getting away, Getting away,

With murder

 

Somewhere beyond happiness and sadness

I need to calculate

What creates my own madness

And I'm addicted to your punishment

And you're the master

And I am craving this disaster

You: word muthf**ka, do you like roxette?

Stranger: Hahaha Tha's what you get

You: get what, it was lovely?

Stranger: Ok dumb time over lol

Stranger: Gee that is soooooooooooooooo lovely to know

You: gee? where you from?

Stranger: Uk yourself?

You: uk

Stranger: I thought you were from NiggerLand

Stranger: Or summit like that

You: I am, Bradford

You: where about in the uk?

Stranger: I am f**king Suicide Hilton but call me Hilton

Stranger: Scotland

You: hilton? that sounds such a sh*t area!

Stranger: Yeah it is

You: I was went to Scotland, aberdeen and stayed in Logie? It was the sh*t man, never been somewhere so nice

Stranger: Really? I hate it here T.T

You: We got to stay in a room with windows

Stranger: Oh yeah are you a boy or girl?

You: Im a bro dude, yourself?

Stranger: I'm a chick

Stranger: Lol I'm a chicken hahaha no I'm a girl

You: How old of a chick?

Stranger: You tell me your age first 'cause I don't do anything without getting it first

Stranger: *Pulls a snobby-ish face*

You: Im a 21 year old bro, but im all man dude!

Stranger: I'm sure you are

You: JMG?

Stranger: Wtf is a JMG?

You: Jimmy Must Go? No?

Stranger: wtf

Stranger: Bye

[minijc]

Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: hi

You: hey how are you doing

Stranger: i'm black

Stranger: thought i'd get it out of the way

Stranger: cause i keep getting disconected when people discover this

You: ok as am I,i have a big pee pee, do you

Stranger: massive mate

Stranger: you're not black though

Stranger: i can prove i am

You: as can I

You: where you from burdda

Stranger: england

Stranger: u?

You: scotchland BRAP BRAP BRAP

Stranger: you aint black ffs

Stranger: why lie

Stranger: there are like 2 black people in scotland

You: Jimmy Calderwood and myself, mini jimmy

You: my name is LEROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOY JENKINS

[Scarface]

Connecting to server...

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: JMG

Stranger: f**k aye

Stranger: WMMG

You: LMAO

Stranger: SMMG

Stranger: You MUST GO!

[fine-n-dandy]

Connecting to server...

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: yo!

Stranger: df!

You: Hi

Stranger: whats up

You: Not us, we're struggling along in forth place

Stranger: oh thats too bad

You: Could be worse i suppose, could be bottom 6

Stranger: i am #1

You: You are numero 2

Stranger: eat a dick

You: Poop

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

or send us feedback.

[Quagmire]

Stranger: JMG

You: f**k aye

Stranger: JMG

You: WMMG

Stranger: LMAO

You: SMMG

You: You MUST GO!

Stranger: BCMG

You: LEON MIKE MUST COME BACK

You: ROBBOMUSTGO

 

You: MiniJC MUST GET LAID

 

 

[Maniac Cop]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: i came

You: cod4cod4cod4

You: wtf?

Stranger: did you?

You: all over my cat yes

Stranger: feels good man

You: cat didnt think so

Stranger: gg

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

 

This is going to be great fun when drunk!

[Dynamo]

Connecting to server...

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: JMG

You: Spread the word

You: JMG

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

 

 

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: JMG

Stranger: anywhere on own

You: JMG? do you agree?

Stranger: ok

Stranger: of course man

You: yas

Stranger: mygosh

You: top 6 is not a success!

You: we want a trophy!

Stranger: damn

Stranger: yes

You: even you can see that!

Stranger: what should i do ?

You: Jimmy must go (JMG) spread the word

Stranger: ok

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

 

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: lets get naked!

Stranger: hello

Stranger: its all we ever do

You: JMG!

You: jimmy must go!

You: Spread the word

 

SPREAD THE WORD :)

[Bobby Connor]

Stranger: Hi

You: Hi, how's it going?

Stranger: where are you from?

You: Are you there

Stranger: Its going very good, and there?

You: I'm fae Govan. Had an awful week.

You: Govan Glasgow, Scotland.

Stranger: ohhh, okay!

Stranger: what happened?

You: I'm a coach of a popular team. We haven't won in ages. Lots of pressure on yours truly.

Stranger: woow.

You: The fans are ridiculous.

Stranger: Why?

You: They expect to win every game, they expect to win trophies.

You: We're not geared up for that sort of thing.

Stranger: dont you have money for gear for your team?

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[Scarface]

Connecting to server...

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: hello

You: Hi

Stranger: would you like a glass of lemonade?

You: No

Stranger: please make yourself at home

You: No thanks

Stranger: ok

You: do you think jimmy should go

Stranger: i think jimmy should go

You: me too

You: he's taken us as far as he can

You: top 6 is not an achievement

Stranger: i agree

Stranger: i vote him off the island

You: who should replace him though

Stranger: me

You: do you have a track record

Stranger: yes

You: elaborate

Stranger: but i am especially good at breaking open locks

You: what about sticking to a 4-4-2

You: and playing players in their natural positions

Stranger: i prefer 5-9-7

You: jimmy prefers 1-1-9

Stranger: youve got it all wrong

Stranger: so does jimmy

Stranger: its all about the 7

You: what jamie smith?

Stranger: almost

Stranger: janice smith

You: worth a look?

Stranger: seems crazy, right?

Stranger: trust me

You: how much would she cost

Stranger: youll be in her pants in no time

You: is she good to have around the place

Stranger: only $30

Stranger: its a bargain

You: what about a loan deal

Stranger: ill supply you with a leash and harness

You: what's her best position

Stranger: we only loan out $20

Stranger: you need a $10 down payment

You: i'm not sure we can afford that

You: milne says we're skint

Stranger: then you'll have to go with ROBERT

You: who does he play for

Stranger: who do you want him to play for

Stranger: lets smoke some herb

You: man utd

Stranger: ?

You: we could get him on loan

You: fergie might do us a favour

Stranger: youre a crack head

Stranger: get out of the gutter

You: Jimmy has put us in the gutter

You: sack him

You: and miller

You: and milne

You have disconnected.

[Bobby Connor]

Connecting to server...

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: Hi , Are you a hun?

Stranger: I'm a Dun.

You: What's a dun?

Stranger: The opposite of a Hun

You: There is no opposite of a Hun unless you are one of God's angels

You: I suspect you are a hun.

Stranger: SHIT I'M DISCOVERED

[minijc]

You: liken chum

Stranger: poll is closed

You: Jensen won anyways

Stranger: so

Stranger: i herd u liek mudkipz.

You: Jensen is like a giant white button

You: ZA BRAP ND TING

Stranger:

Stranger: omg

You: JMG

Stranger: GMJ

You: WMMG

Stranger: WMP

You: are you a hun

Stranger: if u want me to

You: Willie Miller is a hun

Stranger: so ive herd

You: aye JIG

eh

Stranger: yes

You: do you ken fit that means

Stranger: yes

You: what then

[Bobby Connor]

 

Classic thread already.

[Bobby Connor]

Connecting to server...

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: Fuck off

Stranger: i am mohamed

Stranger: and you

You: I'm a ballbag.

Stranger: ?

Stranger: its your name

You: What's so complicated?

You: My name is Neil

You: I'm conducting a survey of the world.

Stranger: sorry but i am irak and no understand english

[Quagmire]

First one to bang some chick off Omegle wins

[Glas_don]

First one to bang some chick off Omegle wins

 

 

wait a minute, there are chicks on this

[Scarface]

Connecting to server...

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: hi!

You: Hi

Stranger: country?

You: Scotland

Stranger: oh, i don't know this!

You: where you from

Stranger: brasil!

You: i am a soccer coach

Stranger: wow! how old are you?

You: in my 50s

Stranger: 50?

You: can u play soccer

Stranger: hahaha there isn't only soccer here

You: are you good to have around the place?

Stranger: do u want that i explain u what there is here?

You: what are you up to next saturday?

You: fancy a game verus caley?

Stranger: what?

You: have you ever played for a dutch ameteur team?

Stranger: no, because i don't play soccer

You: aye and neither does darren mackie but he still gets a game

Stranger: I study History at the college! haha

You: well look up 1983 cup winners cup and you will learn something

Stranger: i dont wanna be a soccer player

You: why not

Stranger: because i wanna be a history professional

You: and i want us to finally win a trophy but it's nae going to happen is it?!

Stranger: hahaha are u crazy?

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[Quagmire]

...or a bloke, i realise its 2009

[Bobby Connor]

:bounce:

 

Scarface's conversations are legendary.

[Quagmire]

I need to get off of here

 

Stranger: Hello

You: hi

Stranger: Helloooo

You: hello my name is Leon Mike

Stranger: This is your first time?

You: sing it with me, Leon Mike Mike Mike

Stranger: Hello my name is Maartje Josiene.

Stranger: Leon Mike Mike Mike!

You: i was once a great player you know!

You: you ever heard of me?

Stranger: A/s/l?

Stranger: A great what player

You: football man

Stranger: Well, then I definitely don't know you.

You: 27/m/originally from manchester but spent the best years of my life in aberdeen

You: google me biatch!

Stranger: Asl

Stranger: I'm not your biatch, thank you.

You: I just told you brother

You: Leon has enough bitches

Stranger: 16/f/netherlands

You: Once again, LEON MIKE MIKE MIKE

 

You: do you not like football?

You: Do you know Scott Calderwood, he stays there

Stranger: Well, then you'll probably won't mind if I disconnect, would you now.

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[fine-n-dandy]

Think i'm being stalked

 

 

 

Connecting to server...

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: Hi!

Stranger: Yes, hello.

Stranger: Is this the internet?

You: tis indeed

Stranger: A friend told me to go here and told me it was the internet.

You: Are u dim?

Stranger: Are you my friend?

Stranger: Friend

You: I'm James, I'm everyones friend, do you work for the press?

Stranger: The newspaper I worked for went bankrupt, now I'm using internet.

You: Must of used some of my quotes eh?

Stranger: I always quote my friends

You: Even if they're stupid & fat & orange?

Stranger: NO, DAD, NO. THAT'S WHERE I POOP

Stranger: ARHGHGHH

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

or send us feedback.

[minijc]

Stranger: I LOVE YOU!!!

Stranger: Dracula's real name is much scarier

Stranger: I respect you now.

You: do you, Well Jimmy Calderwood is my agent, a secret one

Stranger: Do you know about Alvin York?

You: No who is that

Stranger: He killed 20 Germans with 8 bullets from a Colt Pistol and got 132 Germans to bow down and surrendur during the world war.

Stranger: Google him.

You: wow, he aint got sh*t on me though

You: I killed a nation with a cold hard stare

Stranger: Jack Churchill

You: You may know me as Chuck Norris

Stranger: Ran into the world war with a bow, arrows, and a claymore

Stranger: While playing bag pipers

Stranger: pipes*

Stranger: Chuck Norris lost the game.

[NPRC]

Stranger: oi

You: JMG?

Stranger: JMG?

You: Jimmy Must Go?

You: Yay or Nay?

Stranger: yay

You: I like your style

Stranger: you know me?

You: probably not

Stranger: how you like my style, iuahuiahiuahiuhaua

Stranger: where are you from?

You: you don't like jimmy - that's all i need to know

Stranger: who is jimmy?

You: he's an overweight orange tombola merchant

Stranger: ah ok

[Bobby Connor]

Stranger: I LOVE YOU!!!

Stranger: Dracula's real name is much scarier

Stranger: I respect you now.

You: do you, Well Jimmy Calderwood is my agent, a secret one

Stranger: Do you know about Alvin York?

You: No who is that

Stranger: He killed 20 Germans with 8 bullets from a Colt Pistol and got 132 Germans to bow down and surrendur during the world war.

Stranger: Google him.

You: wow, he aint got sh*t on me though

You: I killed a nation with a cold hard stare

Stranger: Jack Churchill

You: You may know me as Chuck Norris

Stranger: Ran into the world war with a bow, arrows, and a claymore

Stranger: While playing bag pipers

Stranger: pipes*

Stranger: Chuck Norris lost the game.

[Dandyjam]

I agree, massive lol to Scarface's conversations!

[Mouse]

Connecting to server...

Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: hello

You: hola? que tal?

Stranger: wus good nig

You: do you like big cocks?

Stranger: nooo, i like big tits

You: do you think JMG?

Stranger: whats that

You: Jimmy Must Go

Stranger: dawg, wtf

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[Bobby Connor]

You: are you good to have around the place?

[Dandyjam]

You: hi

Stranger: r u a grl?

You: no im a guy called jimmy

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[minijc]

Stranger: Hi

You: HIYA

Stranger: Where are you from?

You: USA, yourself

You: ASL ACTUALLY

Stranger: EU

Stranger: Germanyt actually

You: ahh you male or female

Stranger: female

You: ahh straight or gay

Stranger: bi

You: oooh

You: have you got nice arm pitts?

Stranger: and you?

You: I am female with hairy arm pitts from Munich

Stranger: arm pitt

Stranger: ?

Stranger: What is that?

You: yeah is it full of hair us germans are usually like

You: hat

You: that

You: arm pitt joint between shoulder and arm

Stranger: But you said you arte form the USA...

You: But I am on holiday

Stranger: oh

Stranger: No I don;t have arm pitts

You: are you a flid?

Stranger: flid?

You: yeah, armless

Stranger: No

Stranger: I have 1 arm.... otherwise i couldn't type this

Stranger: But I have to go

Stranger: bye

[Mouse]

I'm just freaking them out now. I tried the Millertime quote from my sig:

 

You: once i worked out the dodgy gear placements and the fact that the steering wheel wasnt f**ked, it just i was spoiled by power steering in the past, it became a f**kin joy to drive. lookin out over that big massive bonnet (which i'm asap going to find a young/mature lady to have splayed over for me with her vagina glistening, encouraging my willing member to slide inside...) it felt amazing not driving it, but commanding it. steering it if you will. f**kin lovely!

Stranger: hey

You: is jimmy good to have about the place?

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[Bobby Connor]

Stranger: hi

You: hope we can have a sreious conversation.

You: Too many JIG on here

Stranger: I don't kwon what is JIG, but i have some serious conversations too

You: Jimmy is God. Never mind. Where are you from?

Stranger: I'm from Brazil, you?

You: Cool. I'm from Scotland.

You: Home of Dave Narey.