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Bouncers Are Cunts


OddJob

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You have mates that seem to do everything.

 

Why do they hang around with a mummy's boy like you who couldn't even get laid until you were in your twenties?

Mummys boy? Haha good one, I've got a few groups of mates, I know for a fact I'm not making the above up, unlike you with your tales of being wrecked on drugs.

 

Imagination and virtual reality are wonderful things.

 

I'm going to buy a

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I do enjoy a can of Sweetheart Stout on Hogmanay.

 

Sorry Mini darling, I canna even remember typing my cheeky snippet, was having a Caribbean night by my self. Consisted of a bottle of rum and some Regge Regge nuts. Please accept my humble apologies.

 

I'm highly offended you think I make up rock n roll tales though, highly offended.

 

Accepted, glad you came to your senses, didn't want to have to find you and smash you around, providing my mum would let me out of her sight for a while.

It was a romantic evening, straight up the chutney using only his tears as lubrication.

:laughing:

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Should you nae have been getting that cunt help?

 

Ha ha, funny thing is, within about a year of that he had met a bird, bought a house with her, expecting a kid (they now have two) and totally changed his ways and is never seen out any more. I await the massive rebellion one day, when he goes completely off the rails.

 

Like a bottle of Tonic and some sliced lemon for fucking starters.

 

:laughing: I went to get him a glass, but when I returned with it he said he didn't need it any more and was happily drinking the gin and broth combo.

 

If he doesn't remember how he got the money, how does he know he didn't come about it some other way? :dontknow:

 

His arse wasn't sore enough for him to have earned it! His brother was with him at the time and told him the next day he won it at roulette.

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He also got done for drink driving. Coppers pulled him over when he was absolutely smashed and when they had him in the back of the cop car asked him why he was in the part of town at that time of night (he'd given his address at the time, which was nowhere near there) and he said he was looking at a flat he was thinking about buying (which was true) and he goes 'you've done me a favour though' and they were like 'oh aye, what's that?' to which he replied, 'now I don't need one with parking'.

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