Divorce

[dervish]

Myself very much looking forward to it, not having to talk to her parents. Or them vicariously through her (point blank lies etc).  

Any joyful enjoyable divorces to speak about?

[RAZOR]

Stay strong bud x

[chief_wiggum]

Sorry to hear that.............................was she ony use atween the sheets

[Don Fonte]

17 minutes ago, dervish said:

Myself very much looking forward to it, not having to talk to her parents. Or them vicariously through her (point blank lies etc).  

Any joyful enjoyable divorces to speak about?

She got a nice trim slit min?

I can ride her if you like, give you more bargaining power in the divorce negotiations.

[Reed or deed]

I only speak to my inlaws through their letterbox.

Nothing to do with divorce, i just dislike them.

[Poodler]

You’ll be ok Dervo

 

yi bloody ledge 

[dervish]

4 minutes ago, Reed or deed said:

I only speak to my inlaws through their letterbox.

Nothing to do with divorce, i just dislike them.

Hopefully only piss through it?

[dervish]

13 minutes ago, Don Fonte said:

She got a nice trim slit min?

I can ride her if you like, give you more bargaining power in the divorce negotiations.

Doesn't like the banging not as up for the riding as your humble narrator. Get your Antikythera oot for a bit between all the wanking.

 

You'd be better asking Chippy King for two slices of Cod. Leave them out of the chiller for a bit, you're a gentleman after all.

 

Edit: moved an s no drama.

[dervish]

Honestly best decision I didn't even make.

Can relax now. Not nasty or anything just yep.

[dervish]

28 minutes ago, RAZOR said:

Stay strong bud x

Cheers min. x

Really actually mean that. You too. 

[dervish]

28 minutes ago, chief_wiggum said:

Sorry to hear that.............................was she ony use atween the sheets

Nah hence not that sad.

[dervish]

It's probably at this point should mention opportunity cost*.  Fucking hell what a waste of time (except one thing, I'm sure you can guess).

Edit: * do one thing can't do the other thing, Wikipedia will tie you in knots.

[Beachend Bootboy]

I take it, it's because she didn't understand you.  If it makes you feel any better neither does any cunt on here.  Yeh haverin, bleeter o' nonsensical shite😁😁😉

[Parklife]

Life's too short to spend it with someone who's not right for you. You're best rid if that's the case here  

All the best Dervish. 

[dervish]

7 minutes ago, Parklife said:

Life's too short to spend it with someone who's not right for you. You're best rid of that's the case here  

All the best Dervish. 

Takes time to learn. Pint whenever. Can tell and appreciate it.

[dervish]

Honestly what the fuck was I doing. Little head lead me on the one on top just went along with it.

I knew.

Anyways, anyone in their own mind too much talk, ask, speak. Everyone will hug you soon and it's nice. Just say.
 

 

[Reed or deed]

🤷‍♂️

[For Fecks Sake]

Nice one min, nothing to stop you now doing all those things you always wanted to do but your wife was against, starting with this

https://www.grindr.com/

👍

[Fridge]

It is fucking  tremendous stuff. Worth it for the comedy value of having to go to court alone. Fucking idiot lawyers on both sides. I went for a walk as I was a bit emotional and they fucked me because I wasn’t there. 
 

I said to the lassie you can’t do that and she said you weren’t there. 
 

Well fair enough you stupid bint it wouldn’t be difficult to find me due to the magic of phoning me or seems I was outside.

She settled it without my consent. 
 

Needless to say I have never used her again.

[dervish]

5 minutes ago, For Fecks Sake said:

Nice one min, nothing to stop you now doing all those things you always wanted to do but your wife was against, starting with this

https://www.grindr.com/

👍

I have a casual dislike for my own but ok.

[For Fecks Sake]

3 minutes ago, Fridge said:

Fucking idiot lawyers on both sides. I went for a walk as I was a bit emotional and they fucked me because I wasn’t there. 

'Fucking idiot lawyers' who still managed to make it to the court on time while the fud they were representing went for a walk missing his own case which resulted in him being shafted.......

Might want to rethink that one 😉

[bonzodaddy73]

1 hour ago, dervish said:

Myself very much looking forward to it, not having to talk to her parents. Or them vicariously through her (point blank lies etc).  

Any joyful enjoyable divorces to speak about?

I divorced my ex 12 years ago, best move i ever made. Always got on well with my ex mother in law much to my ex's annoyance because they hated each other. Sadly last year the mother in law died but as i final fuck you to my ex she left everything to me and the kids. My ex went fucking mental, it was hilarious. Ended up getting her arrested and got a court order to keep her away from me because she would turn up screaming and shouting that the kids and i stole her inheritance.

[dervish]

2 minutes ago, Fridge said:

It is fucking  tremendous stuff. Worth it for the comedy value of having to go to court alone. Fucking idiot lawyers on both sides. I went for a walk as I was a bit emotional and they fucked me because I wasn’t there. 
 

I said to the lassie you can’t do that and she said you weren’t there. 
 

Well fair enough you stupid bint it wouldn’t be difficult to find me due to the magic of phoning me or seems I was outside.

She settled it without my consent. 
 

Needless to say I have never used her again.

Emm carried on with my own thing did you get raped?  Mebbies controversial option but men can't get raped by women. We'll fuck everything. Slightly confused thought you were trying to metoo out of a "wasn't even drunk cana't blame that".

Man likes hole all it is.

[Redforever86]

11 minutes ago, Fridge said:

It is fucking  tremendous stuff. Worth it for the comedy value of having to go to court alone. Fucking idiot lawyers on both sides. I went for a walk as I was a bit emotional and they fucked me because I wasn’t there. 
 

I said to the lassie you can’t do that and she said you weren’t there. 
 

Well fair enough you stupid bint it wouldn’t be difficult to find me due to the magic of phoning me or seems I was outside.

She settled it without my consent. 
 

Needless to say I have never used her again.

Why were you emotional? Was she keeping the friends box set you big poof? 

[RAZOR]

1 hour ago, Reed or deed said:

I only speak to my inlaws through their letterbox.

Nothing to do with divorce, i just dislike them.

Do they communicate back to you through said letterbox? Genuine question.

[Fridge]

7 minutes ago, Redforever86 said:

Why were you emotional? Was she keeping the friends box set you big poof? 

No the actual story was I didn’t want to get divorced, and I went for a walk as I had to think about the settlement and I thought I would go for a walk and think about it.

 

[Reed or deed]

2 minutes ago, RAZOR said:

Do they communicate back to you through said letterbox? Genuine question.

You didn’t think i was being serious? 😅

[RAZOR]

Anything is possible on the Hat.

[Fridge]

42 minutes ago, Redforever86 said:

Why were you emotional? Was she keeping the friends box set you big poof? 

Na because despite coming across as a fucking poof I loved her and still do. I’ll get her back at some point.

[CraigHill]

Divorce is great once you get over the pay off!!!

Back to doing whatever the fuck you want!