Bluto10 Posted July 28, 2018 Share Posted July 28, 2018 The reason you don't is that you have nothing about you mentally or physically You couldn't do a best man speech, you're not up to itYou're an anchovy, I'm an orcaHey big guyanchovies makes fuckin good pizzas but you, you are indeed apex. Killer whale. Link to comment
ebbe Posted July 28, 2018 Share Posted July 28, 2018 I did a best man speech last year I wasn't allowed any drugs beforehand. And my speech was entirely rewritten when vetted by some more sensible people than me, the night before. Managed to hold up the first dance though. Nowhere to be found, racking up lines in the ladies toilet with a bridesmaid. Then the party started. Tough gig, when soberPoor form from the groom insisting, or agreeing to you being straight. I’d of insisted on the party Poodler. Link to comment
Bluto10 Posted July 28, 2018 Share Posted July 28, 2018 done one speech.Mostly off the cuff.Wasn’t sober.didn’t enjoy it. it’s horrendous hearing a NE accent.esp when it’s your own 1 Link to comment
Arabian Knight Posted July 28, 2018 Share Posted July 28, 2018 I hate public speaking, was best man at 19 for my mate.....speech was horrendous, shat my pants (not literally, I was in a Kilt anyway obvs) second time was for my brothers wedding, 14 years later, speech went well, not as nervous. Definitely requires a bit of confidence or maturity or both........not sure about shoulder width thoughYer speech wis horrendous cos yer a waste eh space. Ye goat ony idea how shyte ye ir? Every cunts goat ye oan block cos yer that pysh. Is it sinking in wit a waste eh skin ye ir? 2 4 Link to comment
The Boofon Posted July 28, 2018 Share Posted July 28, 2018 Poor form from the groom insisting, or agreeing to you being straight. Id of insisted on the party Poodler.Even poorer form getting a speech vetted. Link to comment
dazzy_deff Posted July 28, 2018 Share Posted July 28, 2018 Even poorer form getting a speech vetted.Agreed. Expected better fae poodles. Thought he had a backbone. Link to comment
The Boofon Posted July 28, 2018 Share Posted July 28, 2018 Lad I worked with from Bradford did a best man speech. One of the brides family had been done for stabbing someone. Think it was a brother. Anyway he gets bladdered and starts the speech saying the marriage better work or there will be another bloodbath. Mass brawl erupted approx. 30 seconds later. Didnt finish his speech. ?? Link to comment
minijc Posted July 28, 2018 Share Posted July 28, 2018 Been best man once and the speech was fine, initially was a little scared of it but after 13 days straight boozing it was a lot easier than I has expected, got a few laughs, the groom and his wife loved it, got a trip to the world darts championships as a gift which was rare. Link to comment
Guest milne_afc Posted July 28, 2018 Share Posted July 28, 2018 Wouldn't ever be a best man, have refused twice. Marriage is an outdated concept and a sign of weakness for any so called man who agrees to it. It's for poofters and lezzas these days anyway. Link to comment
BillyStarkDivinHeeder Posted July 28, 2018 Share Posted July 28, 2018 Poor form from the groom insisting, or agreeing to you being straight. Id of insisted on the party Poodler.5 minutes of him laughing until guided back to his seat? Link to comment
BillyStarkDivinHeeder Posted July 28, 2018 Share Posted July 28, 2018 Wouldn't ever be a best man, have refused twice. Marriage is an outdated concept and a sign of weakness for any so called man who agrees to it. It's for poofters and lezzas these days anyway.Yip. Weddings - lol. Link to comment
ebbe Posted July 28, 2018 Share Posted July 28, 2018 5 minutes of him laughing until guided back to his seat?He has an infectious laugh. Perfect for such a scenario. Link to comment
King Street Loon Posted July 28, 2018 Share Posted July 28, 2018 Been a best man once and it went well. Speech was well received i think.Piece of piss. Link to comment
BillyStarkDivinHeeder Posted July 28, 2018 Share Posted July 28, 2018 He has an infectious laugh. Perfect for such a scenario.I'd have enjoyed it more if it wasn't for my concern that I was heading the same way. Link to comment
mcdougall(4) Posted July 28, 2018 Share Posted July 28, 2018 I was at one last year Best man told a story about the two of them getting lifted by the bizziesWhich the bride, his mum, his dad had no idea of.Bit of a conflab all round at the end of it.I laughed... Link to comment
mcdougall(4) Posted July 28, 2018 Share Posted July 28, 2018 I was at one last year Best man told a story about the two of them getting lifted by the bizziesWhich the bride, his mum, his dad had no idea of.Bit of a conflab all round at the end of it.I laughed... Link to comment
HairyPie Posted July 29, 2018 Share Posted July 29, 2018 Lad I worked with from Bradford did a best man speech. One of the brides family had been done for stabbing someone. Think it was a brother. Anyway he gets bladdered and starts the speech saying the marriage better work or there will be another bloodbath. Mass brawl erupted approx. 30 seconds later. Didnt finish his speech. ??Is he going to the game? Link to comment
The Boofon Posted July 29, 2018 Share Posted July 29, 2018 Is he going to the game?Ill ask if he fancies a tear up on Wednesday night. Weve no tickets though so might not invite him to game. Link to comment
Bluto10 Posted July 29, 2018 Share Posted July 29, 2018 Was set to be best man once - but the groom got dumped Groomsman for another, where I managed to raise a laugh reading out the cards while high on cocaineA well known local ped always sends a card to our weddings.Much to the crews hilarity. Link to comment
Bluto10 Posted July 29, 2018 Share Posted July 29, 2018 my latest proper purchases have all been worn yesterday and today.not looked so dapper in the #cruiser since approx the end of the A/W collection last year Link to comment
cruzcampo3 Posted July 29, 2018 Share Posted July 29, 2018 ^An Aberdeen one to hang over the balcony?Not an Aberdeen one this time do have a couple in the cupboard though. Not a Foundry Red and places I go you get a note under the door telling you to remove your towel from hanging over the balcony Link to comment
cruzcampo3 Posted July 29, 2018 Share Posted July 29, 2018 Ralph Lauren T shirt that was on sale Link to comment
cruzcampo3 Posted July 29, 2018 Share Posted July 29, 2018 How positively unfashionableCan’t always wear my best Italian suits. Link to comment
Chewie37 Posted July 29, 2018 Share Posted July 29, 2018 Yer speech wis horrendous cos yer a waste eh space. Ye goat ony idea how shyte ye ir? Every cunts goat ye oan block cos yer that pysh. Is it sinking in wit a waste eh skin ye ir?Yes, you're so right, I'll take more tips from an online fake character, fuck off you boring repetitive spastic cunt. 1 Link to comment
Arabian Knight Posted July 29, 2018 Share Posted July 29, 2018 Yes, you're so right, I'll take more tips from an online fake character, fuck off you boring repetitive spastic cunt.Pffft, Wit a fuckin benderStill canna git the picture oot meh heed eh ye floatin in byens pool, heheheEh mind cunts saying ye wir a poof. It wis true 1 1 Link to comment
King Street Loon Posted July 29, 2018 Share Posted July 29, 2018 Yes, you're so right, I'll take more tips from an online fake character, fuck off you boring repetitive spastic cunt.He's got you rattled chewie. 1 Link to comment
Arabian Knight Posted July 29, 2018 Share Posted July 29, 2018 Thir wis a eerie pic eh chewie floatin face doon in the byens pool wi a btl up ez stinker n lubbocks ghost in the backgrun lyin oan the sunlounger wi the manky bergen rat gittin ez root sooked 2 Link to comment
BrianFaePerth Posted July 30, 2018 Share Posted July 30, 2018 Whatever turns you on AK 1 Link to comment
Chewie37 Posted July 30, 2018 Share Posted July 30, 2018 He's got you rattled chewie.He does have me rattled, he's imagining me naked face down in a pool.....but of Arabian Barrymore going on here, and folk try and say @@Dad does the grooming. No Arabian Kunt, you just go and fuck off now, like the wee fake scurrying serpent that you are Link to comment
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