Rogue Traders - roofers

[perthshirered]

44 minutes ago, maryhilldon said:

Expensive packs of cigarettes going missing would be noticed in no time.

Okay, you got me. I made it all up. 

[cheesepipes]

1 hour ago, maryhilldon said:

Expensive packs of cigarettes going missing would be noticed in no time.

I stole around 100 quid of batteries a month from 1992 to y2k from a small family run instrumentation business.

Along with several others.

Never picked up once.

The only time I got disciplined was when I tried to make an exploding device with a 3 litre juice bottle and various fermenting rotten fruits, powders and liquids.

Detonated it in the carpark as the big boss came out. Couldn't take a joke that cunt.

[JumboJET]

12 hours ago, perthshirered said:

Was either that or be forced onto Lambert and Butler. That was embarrassing at 14 years old. 

Growing up in Perthshite is embarrassing. End

[perthshirered]

9 minutes ago, JumboJET said:

Growing up in Perthshite is embarrassing. End.

Perthshite? 

One of the first things they taught us in Primary school was that folk who use the term "Perthshite" are spastics. I've always doubted this theory but,  after all this time, undoubted evidence. 

[Poodler]

1 hour ago, cheesepipes said:

I stole around 100 quid of batteries a month from 1992 to y2k from a small family run instrumentation business.

Along with several others.

Never picked up once.

The only time I got disciplined was when I tried to make an exploding device with a 3 litre juice bottle and various fermenting rotten fruits, powders and liquids.

Detonated it in the carpark as the big boss came out. Couldn't take a joke that cunt.

Decent explosion at least? 

[cheesepipes]

41 minutes ago, Poodler said:

Decent explosion at least? 

Wasn't bad, it was the putrid mess left on the carpark and building wall that the boss took umbrage with. 

Possibly rightly so.

 

[elephantstone78]

You know what these last few pages tell me? That the wee arseholes today are no different from any previous generation. 
Maybe slightly more innocent times when ol Dad and his peers grew up though. Pilfering apples from the local farmer and catching a glimpse of a young lady’s ankles beneath eight layers of petticoat was the extent of their shenanigans. 

[sigh]

Just now, Sooper-hanz said:

The wee cunts of today are soft as shite. 

aye, thats why more and more of them are carrying knives

and need to spike drinks to get a lady

[Simply Red]

20 hours ago, elephantstone78 said:

Haha £1 a day does sound bad, I suppose it took about an hour from start to finish before school. 
Still shit money and I remember getting a weekend job as a kitchen porter not too long afterwards for about £3.50 an hour and thinking I had hit the big time. 
 

 

I had the same early career path. I got £3.50ph washing dishes and was delighted. 

[Dom Sullivan]

22 hours ago, perthshirered said:

How auld are yous cunts? Must be fuckin ancient if you were only on a pound a day. 

Ha ha.

My paper round paid the princely sum of 97 and a half pence per week for trudging round with the Evening Depressed six days a week.

R S Fucking McColl Garthdee - thieving gypos 
 

[perthshirered]

28 minutes ago, Dom Sullivan said:

Ha ha.

My paper round paid the princely sum of 97 and a half pence per week for trudging round with the Evening Depressed six days a week.

R S Fucking McColl Garthdee - thieving gypos 
 

I hope the natives tipped well at Christmas to make up for it. 

[Don Fonte]

11 minutes ago, perthshirered said:

I hope the natives tipped well at Christmas to make up for it. 

Had a great trick as a paper boy.  Posted a Xmas card from me through everyone's doors mid December.

Muchos cards back with large tips in the following week.  Got about £50.

[elephantstone78]

11 minutes ago, Don Fonte said:

Had a great trick as a paper boy.  Posted a Xmas card from me through everyone's doors mid December.

Muchos cards back with large tips in the following week.  Got about £50.

Did the same. 
Also took on an additional round in the afternoons (evening times) round about late October/ early November and then cancelled it in January. 
Must have been fit as a butcher’s dog back then. 

[Don Fonte]

17 minutes ago, elephantstone78 said:

Did the same. 
Also took on an additional round in the afternoons (evening times) round about late October/ early November and then cancelled it in January. 
Must have been fit as a butcher’s dog back then. 

That's the way to do it.

Aye, and learned a little discipline getting your arse out of bed in time to earn money then go to school.

The last time I saw a paper being delivered (a good few years ago), the little cunt was getting driven round by his mum.

[maryhilldon]

8 minutes ago, Don Fonte said:

That's the way to do it.

Aye ok Punch.

[Don Fonte]

6 minutes ago, maryhilldon said:

Aye ok Punch.

You could fucking fit on a Punch & Judy stage you midget fucker. *

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

*Knew you'd be the one to bite and set me up for that quip.

 

[Don Fonte]

Just now, Sooper-hanz said:

😂 same . I got about £15 which I thought was a fortune. 

I thought I was a game changer.  Just as many sneaky little bastards as me it seems.

[For Fecks Sake]

Used to deliver those free Aberdeen papers back in the day - The Citizen and some other title I cannot remember the name of (Advertiser?)

Piss poor money but you got extra when there were leaflets included.

Well when I say deliver them, I mean I only delivered them to the houses who complained if they never got them and dumped the rest in a building site.

Got away with it for a month or so before they discovered what I was doing and sacked me 😂

 

[Redforever86]

Herald and Post, done it after I quit the evening express. Also done the independent a few times covering holiday shifts. Was never a dumper of papers, not many other jobs on the go at 13/14.

[BrianFaePerth]

16 minutes ago, Redforever86 said:

Herald and Post, done it after I quit the evening express. Also done the independent a few times covering holiday shifts. Was never a dumper of papers, not many other jobs on the go at 13/14.

Loved it so much you bought a paper shop

[The Boofon]

Green Final and milk were top paid jobs. 
 

Milk purely for the skimming of cash (no pun intended)

Green Final for the drunken punters in pubs and selling papers with the top ripped off so you could send the top back as an unsold paper. 
 

Halcyon days. 

[The Boofon]

1 minute ago, Sooper-hanz said:

Milk runs always had the best tips as the lads collected the cash. 

That’s why it had the best pay too. 
 

“15 Seafield Street never paid this week.”

 😇 

 

(Probably what you were implying)

[dave_min]

2 hours ago, Redforever86 said:

Herald and Post, done it after I quit the evening express. Also done the independent a few times covering holiday shifts. Was never a dumper of papers, not many other jobs on the go at 13/14.

Apologies to every reader in Danestone that missed out on both around the year 2000. I tripped and all the papers fell in the River Don.

[Ohjimmyjimmy]

Papers too, Sundays were a bastard though - two bags filled to the gunwhales with all the supplements.

 

I delivered to an estate that was mostly pensioners, it was a fucking gold mine at Christmas. A wee cheap Christmas card in December with a handwritten note “from your Postboy” returned a generous £10 or £20 the following week from the gullible old cunts. Cashback. 💷 

[Guest Matt Armstrong's Dog]

5 hours ago, Sooper-hanz said:

Milk runs always had the best tips as the lads collected the cash. 

Folk that I know who worked on the milk rounds up in Fraserburgh and the surrounding area were known to take the occasion "dippy" into the float's takings. 

Some were caught, some were not. A mate of mine nabbed £79, which was decent coin back then.

I used to pinch pint bottles of Murdoch's orange juice from a milk float parked near to Fraserburgh Academy en route to school. Either sold them for 20p a pop to fellow classmates or kept them for my playtime piece. Looking back I was shafted, just like the milkman😄.

A nice wee earner was had though and subsidised the £1.50 pocket money I received from my parents. 👍