Pet Hates

[Poodler]

Money don’t make my world go round, I’m reaching out for a higher ground??

Hahaha

[dazzy_deff]

No need to be so red-yellow about it all.

Turned out I was a cool blue.

[The Boofon]

I was on the lego bricks one last Friday - absolute nonsense. Walked out with a 18 page document about my personality - given to me by folk who don't know me.

 

Then told to display my lego bricks on my desk - wise up.

I do that every year. Your co workers and managers fill in an anonymous appraisal on you.

 

Easy to work out who said what purely from the way they write.

 

The Commissioning Manager wrote “needs to grow a grey beard” on the “How I can progress to the next grade” question.

 

Highly amusing at the time but you’ve to use the feedback reports for internal job applications.

[dazzy_deff]

I do that every year. Your co workers and managers fill in an anonymous appraisal on you.

 

Easy to work out who said what purely from the way they write.

 

The Commissioning Manager wrote “needs to grow a grey beard” on the “How I can progress to the next grade” question.

 

Highly amusing at the time but you’ve to use the feedback reports for internal job applications.

Ours was based on a questionnaire we filled in about ourselves. Canna complain too much, was a day out the office.

 

If you grew a greybeard you’d look like Noel Edmonds.

[The Boofon]

One original thought is worth a 1000 mindless quotings.

[Fridge]

Yeah but either you SHOULD be there and therefore your non interest in who people are is poor

 

Or, you shouldn't be there at all in which case you should be challenging your invite

You’ve roped me in MT but how the fuck do you challenge your invite to meetings or team building exercises?

 

Do a no show? Decline and put a comment say I’m can’t be fucked going to that horseshit? I’m afraid I can’t make a meeting that everyone has been requested to go to as I have the dentist?

 

Genuinely intrigued as to your tactics as we might all be able to adopt them.

[shut up meg]

Money don’t make my world go round however it helps when buying a reacharound

[RAZOR]

It probably better just to go but with minimal participation. I told them I thought the Lego thing was very demeaning . When I said that, a few folk agreed, a couple also refused to do it, and the whole thing was basically ruined. The couple hosting the event were rattled. 

 

I suggested maybe constructing a fun limerick would be a better way to pass half an hour. 

 

I rule. 

 

Always on Time being a classic.

[Poodler]

Always on Time being a classic.

He was on fire then. Mesmerize. Livin it Up. I'm real.

[Parklife]

He was on fire then. Mesmerize. Livin it Up. I'm real.

Never again trumps the lot imo.

[For Fecks Sake]

Canna be arsed trawling back through this thread but I reckon I have mentioned this one before....

 

Cunts who wear those 'hilarious' Christmas suits. You know the ones, adorned with Christmas trees or snow flakes, cheap as fuck, made of shite polyester that means they are probably a walking fire hazard.

 

Just walked past a bloke wearing one, probably on his way to his works Christmas party. Imagine he believes that he is the office 'joker' whereas in reality he the office cunt.

 

@@Millertime are you in Aberdeen today by any chance?

 

Aye, it's been a long day.....

[Poodler]

People (women) unplugging emergency equipment to plug in the Xmas tree lights.

[zander]

People (women) unplugging emergency equipment to plug in the Xmas tree lights.

Life support machines?

[StandFree1982]

Canna be arsed trawling back through this thread but I reckon I have mentioned this one before....

 

Cunts who wear those 'hilarious' Christmas suits. You know the ones, adorned with Christmas trees or snow flakes, cheap as fuck, made of shite polyester that means they are probably a walking fire hazard.

 

Just walked past a bloke wearing one, probably on his way to his works Christmas party. Imagine he believes that he is the office 'joker' whereas in reality he the office cunt.

 

@@Millertime are you in Aberdeen today by any chance?

 

Aye, it's been a long day.....

 

I'd imagine anyone wearing something like that is suffering from chronic depression. You'd have to, wouldn't you?

 

People who describe themselves as "fun" and "crazy" are the same. Usually boring cunts too. 

[reekie_dock]

People (women) unplugging emergency equipment to plug in the Xmas tree lights.

Where’s your xmas spirit Scrooge ??

 

Unplug a mong, plug in some fairy lights. It’s not like the mong was lightening up anyone’s day

[The Boofon]

People (women) unplugging emergency equipment to plug in the Xmas tree lights.

Haha. Jesus.

[BrianFaePerth]

When you get a coffee from the same place every morning, all the staff ken you and have a natter and then one day they have a temp who doesn't know you and has to take your order AND name.

 

Ffs, simple staff training.

[BWG]

I'd imagine anyone wearing something like that is suffering from chronic depression. You'd have to, wouldn't you?

 

People who describe themselves as "fun" and "crazy" are the same. Usually boring cunts too.

 

In my experience these types are usually just completely devoid of a real personality and try to make up for it with such zany antics as wearing garish Christmas attire and making slightly inappropriate comments in the office. Generally harmless individuals and easily ignored, as opposed to the loud mouthed over-compensating weegie type.

[Poodler]

'Raising awareness

[dazzy_deff]

People who call footballers by their first name. Just listened to a hun at work refer to Wes Foderingham as Wes, throughout a 10 minute conversation. Hes nae your mate pal,

[Bluto10]

When you get a coffee from the same place every morning, all the staff ken you and have a natter and then one day they have a temp who doesn't know you and has to take your order AND name.

Ffs, simple staff training.

Oh oh lads, breathe in. Here comes Pongy Pommy for his skinny soya late with extra shot.

[Ke1t]

Female singers who cover songs but do it a lot slower than the original and make it sound all melancholy . I fucking hate that. 

 

The wife watches all these dumb fucking drama shows on the telly, I don't know what they're called because I don't really watch telly... but they're all these over-emotional, melodramatic dramas, aimed primarily at cretins and people who have too many cats. 

 

Anyway, it seems like any time they come to a bit of melodrama, that's once every 5 minutes minimum, they stick a stupid, low-key, overly-slow piano song on... the kind where the singer has a husky voice like she's been crying... while the actor or actress is looking out a window at the rain, or some weak-minded female sobs in a chair as her granny is taken off life support. 

 

I'm in a different room in the house, but like clockwork I'll hear the fucking piano kick in and some 30 fags a day sounding cunt of a vocalist go, "Whoooooaaa uuuhhhhhh oooooohhhh... ooooooo" *piano*. 

 

If I ever snapped and grabbed a knife, ice pick, golf club, or broken bottle to go murder some lad in his flat it would be because of this shite doing in my last fucking nerve... 

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XJDrv9nenQ8

[manboobs109]

Female singers who cover songs but do it a lot slower than the original and make it sound all melancholy . I fucking hate that.

Annie Lennox done that to Smack My Bitch Up. Fucking ruined it.

[Ke1t]

Lad wanted me to fix his iPad for him because I'm "The computer guy". 

 

Explained to him I know fuck all about Apple products, and I probably couldn't even figure out how to turn his iPad on. 

 

"But I thought you were a computer guy?" he said suspiciously. 

 

"Yup, but as mentioned earlier in this very conversation, I know fuck all about Apple products."

 

He then proceeded to go over his problem in exactly the same way he had worded his initial explanation of the problem, ignoring the fact that I know fuck all about Apple products. 

 

Presumably his reiteration was intended to make me an expert in Apple Care, unfortunately it had no effect on my knowledge of Apple products and I still know fuck all about Apple products. 

 

This kind of annoyance happens on a fairly regular basis. 

 

I'm just saying.

[DD1903]

Female singers who cover songs but do it a lot slower than the original and make it sound all melancholy . I fucking hate that.

Joss Stone and that version of Fell in Love With a Girl. Fucking awful

[elephantstone78]

Everything that is on itv be.

 

Overly friendly people. Makes me look like a right dour cunt when am with them when actually I’m normal(ish)and they are weird. Have one pal and he hugs other pals and their partners etc when he sees them. This then makes my perfectly civil greeting look like I have just spat in their face.

[Dom Sullivan]

@@elephantstone78

Everything that is on itv be.

Overly friendly people. Makes me look like a right dour cunt when am with them when actually I’m normal(ish)and they are weird. Have one pal and he hugs other pals and their partners etc when he sees them. This then makes my perfectly civil greeting look like I have just spat in their face.

Lol

 

I'm with you on this.

 

Nae time for this touchy feely pish.

[Tommy]

@@elephantstone78

Lol

I'm with you on this.

Nae time for this touchy feely pish.

Yet you kissed me on each cheek and shook my hand when we met at Hampden.

[Dom Sullivan]

Yet you kissed me on each cheek and shook my hand when we met at Hampden.

You shouldn't have bent down to tie your shoelaces then...

[Tommy]

You shouldn't have bent down to tie your shoelaces then...

Touché